How to tell if a guy likes you: 43 signs he has a crush on you

How do you know if a guy likes you?

My name is Viktor Sander. I’ve been working as a dating coach for over 8 years helping both men and women understand the signs we give when we like someone.

Here are the 43 best signs to help you tell if a guy has a crush on you or not.

1. Does he ever stare at you?

You probably know how hard it is to NOT look at someone you like. Prolonged eye contact without talking is a big tell that a guy likes you.

But to be fair, it’s common that guys stare at any girl they find attractive. And it’s an easy way for him to show his interest without having to approach you. But who knows, he might even have a secret crush on you?

2. Is he mirroring you?

Mirroring means that his body language, posture, or even what he’s saying reflects what you said or did.

Examples of mirroring:

  • When you take a sip of your glass, he also takes a sip of his glass
  • When you cross your legs, he crosses his legs
  • When you get very animated/passionate in a conversation, he also gets animated
  • When you lean in, he also leans in
  • When you laugh, he laughs

Note that mirroring is done subconsciously when he has a good rapport with you. But it can also be done consciously if he really wants to impress you or bond with you. It’s a great sign either way.

3. Has he added you on social media (like Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, or WhatsApp) after you met?

Adding you on social media means that he wants to keep contact with you and might be a bit interested in you. This is also good because now you can more easily start a conversation with him online.

4. How long are his texts or messages compared to yours?

If his texts are about the same length or longer than yours, that’s great. It’s especially good if they’re longer than yours.

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If he usually gives short answers compared to you, that’s a bad sign. When you’re giving him long replies, but not getting the same in return, it means you’re probably too eager.

In that case, it’s good to step back a bit and try to match him better.

5. Is he teasing you?

Most forms of teasing (even mean teasing) are usually a sign he’s interested in you. It means he’s trying to create a flirty vibe between you and that he wants a reaction from you.

Have fun with it and don’t be afraid to tease him back! 😉

6. Is he doing the “lean in”?

If he’s leaning in toward you, that shows he wants to get closer to you (or he’s really passionate about what he’s saying). When a guy has a crush on you, it can feel like he’s magnetically drawn to you.

7. Is he getting “too close” to you compared to what is normal?

If you’re in a conversation and you feel like he’s edging closer to you, or as if he’s almost uncomfortably too close to you, that’s a good sign. He may be attracted to you and wants to feel closer to you both physically and mentally.

Note that different cultures have different “personal spaces”. So, if he’s from a different culture than you, see how close he gets to others to see if it’s just you or everyone.

8. Has he ever offered you a massage?

This is one of the more obvious tells that a guy likes you. Offering a massage is a nice thing to do, but it’s also a smooth way for a guy to get you both touching each other. (Remember to offer him one back if you like him!)

9. Is he smiling toward you?

If he’s smiling toward you from afar, that’s an invitation to approach him. (I’m assuming you didn’t just forget to put your pants on when leaving home.)

If he’s smiling toward you when you’re in a conversation, that’s a sign he likes you. Especially if he has a light smile while you’re not even joking.

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10. Is he giving you mixed signals?

Mixed signals are really tricky to interpret and can make anyone confused. But in most cases, they do mean he’s interested in you. Here are the most common reasons why he’s giving you mixed and confusing signals.

9 Reasons why he’s giving you mixed signals:

  1. He doesn’t want to come off as too eager
  2. He’s shy
  3. He’s nervous and insecure
  4. He’s afraid of seeming desperate
  5. He’s afraid you’ll reject him
  6. He’s inexperienced in flirting
  7. He’s following some weird rules or pick-up tips he’s read
  8. He’s just flirting with you (because flirting is all about giving mixed signals)
  9. He likes the attention or validation he gets from you but isn’t really interested in you

If you need help, explain your situation in as much detail as possible in the comments. I’ll reply to well-written comments and help you interpret the signs.

11. Does he give you any compliments?

Getting a compliment from a guy in your age is a good sign. If he’s giving you compliments about how pretty you are, it’s an even better sign.

It can be hard to tell a friendly compliment from a romantic one because they can sound exactly the same. To know for sure, look for other signs he’s also giving you or describe your situation in the comments below.

12. How large are his pupils when you two are talking?

If his pupils get large when you’re in a conversation, you’re doing something right. This one is quite subtle because pupil size is primarily determined by light levels, but secondarily attraction can also increase pupil size.

13. Is he holding eye contact with you for “too long”?

When a guy has a crush on you, it can be so hard for him to keep his eyes off of you. You can notice this if he’s holding eye contact with you slightly too long.

It can almost feel a little weird or intense when it happens. And that’s great (if you like him).

Click here if you want to learn how to improve your eye contact.

14. Is he giving you a slight smile when you get eye contact?

If you’re standing in a group, and when someone else is talking, you two get eye contact. Does he give you a slight smile?

Same thing if you get eye contact at a distance, in a park, or at a bar. A smile is an invitation to start talking. He’s interested!

15. If there’s background music, what’s his body language and what is he looking at?

This sign is most useful at a place with some background music, for example at a bar or a club.

If he’s moving in rhythm with the background music and at the same time looking at you, that’s a sign he’s attracted to you. Dancing like that and looking at you is an inviting form of body language. That tells you he wants your attention and is trying to get you to make a move.

16. Does he straighten his posture when he is close to you?

Is he straightening his back and standing up more straight? It means he’s a bit self-conscious when hanging out near you and he wants to make a good impression.

Not that strong of a sign because most single guys want to make a good impression on attractive girls. But if you see it together with many other signs, it means more.

17. What direction is he facing in group situations?

If he’s facing you more often than he’s facing others in a group, that’s a sign he’s into you and values you more than others in the group. This is especially telling if you’re not the one talking the most in the group.

18. Where are his feet pointing?

If his feet are pointing toward you, that’s a sign in the same line as if his body is facing you. He’s subconsciously focused on you which makes his feet point toward you.

19. Is he fiddling with or straightening his clothes or accessories?

This could be because of nervosity, but it can also be because he wants to look good in front of you. It’s a classic sign of attraction.

20. What direction are his palms facing?

If the palms of his hands are pointed in your direction that signals he might be interested in you. It’s a small sign, but it’s still positive because it’s part of an open and welcoming body language he has toward you.

21. If you touch him, does he touch you back?

For example, if you touch his arm, does he touch you in a similar area later on in the conversation? If he does reciprocate your touch, that’s a great sign.

If he’s shy or inexperienced, he might not feel comfortable touching you back even if he has a crush on you.

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22. Is he extra touchy with you?

A good tell he likes you is if he’s touching you unusually much compared to others.

Common areas to touch are arms, shoulders, back, hands, or thighs. Hands or thighs are usually more intimate if he touches those.

23. Do you ever have “peripheral physical contact”?

Peripheral physical contact is when some part of your bodies are in contact with each other when you are doing something else.

Example: If you’re both sitting down and your thighs are barely touching each other. Or if you’re walking side by side and he grabs hold of your arm.

This kind of passive physical contact means a lot and can build a lot of suspense and attraction. It’s the best feeling being close to someone you got a crush on.

24. Is he giving you more of his attention than he’s giving others?

The more attention he gives you, the more interested he usually is in you. Compare this to how much attention he gives to other girls also hanging out with him or in the same group as you.

Example: If you’re in a group but he seems to direct most of his attention toward you. It could be that he’s asking you lots of questions or that he’s laughing more than others at your jokes. Or just listening more intently to you.

25. Does he ever blush when you talk or get eye-contact?

He might just be shy, but he’s probably a bit extra self-conscious around you because he likes you. This makes him blush around you.

Social anxiety can also cause blushing. But it’s still a great sign.

26. Does he seem to look in your direction from far away?

Guys can be a bit sneaky when they want to check you out. They can make it seem like they’re only looking in your direction or just grazing you with his eyes. And if he has sunglasses it’s even harder to know if he’s checking you out.

So if he’s looking in your direction, especially if he does it several times, he’s probably checking you out.

27. Does he keep the conversation going when you stop talking?

What happens when there’s a pause in the conversation or if you stop talking? If he seems eager to get the conversation going again, that’s good. If he lets the conversation die out or excuses himself, he may not be that interested (unless he’s just shy).

28. How quickly does he reply when you text or message him?

A quick reply is a good sign he likes you. Also, if he replies with several texts to your one text, that’s even better.

However, if he likes you, he may also delay his replies to avoid seeming needy or desperate. But as long as he replies, it’s all good. If he’s slow to reply, it could just mean he’s busy or he doesn’t like texting, so don’t read too much into it.

29. Who texts or calls first?

Is he the one initiating contact or are you? If he is, that probably means he’s interested in you.

But if he never calls or texts first, that’s a sign of lack of interest. In that case, it can be good to take a step back to see if he will take initiative. If you’re always so quick to take initiative, he might never even have a chance to do it first.

30. How often does he text you?

Compare this to how often you text him. He’s eager if he’s texting more often than you, and you’re more eager if you’re the one texting more often. If he’s sending you several texts in a row without a reply it’s a stronger sign.

31. Does he stammer, stutter, or become awkward in a conversation with you?

This could mean that he feels shy or self-conscious around you. When a guy likes you, it’s common that he gets a bit extra awkward or stutters when talking to you. That’s because he gets uncomfortable and doesn’t want to mess up in front of you. It’s kind of cute, isn’t it?

32. Does he back off if you get a bit too close?

If he doesn’t even flinch when you get a bit too close to his personal space, that’s a sign he wants you close to him.

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If you take a step closer, and he backs off by a step, that’s a sign he’s a bit more reserved toward you.

33. Does he ever talk about things he wants to do with you?

Planning or mentioning things he wants to do with you in the future is a very strong indication of some sort of interest, romantic or platonic.

Example: If you’re talking about a newly opened restaurant and they say “We should go there someday!” or “I’ll show you how amazing that place is!”

34. How does he react when you discover you have something in common?

If he’s happy, that’s good. This sign is extra strong if it’s something very trivial, like that you live in the same part of town, that you’re the same age, or that you both like pizza.

Example: You discover that you both grew up in the same city and he gets really excited about it even if it’s no big deal.

35. Is he asking you any personal questions?

If he is, that’s telling you that he wants to know more about you and is interested in you. The more he asks, the better.

Example: Asking about your plans for the future, your childhood, or your favorite food.

36. Has he asked you about your plans for the day or the weekend?

This might just be empty small talk, but it could also be him trying to open a window where you can meet again and hang out. It’s more likely it’s a sign of interest if he brings it up near the end of the conversation.

37. Is he trying to make you jealous?

This is a strong sign he’s interested in you. But it’s also a sign he’s emotionally immature and manipulative. I would avoid someone acting like that. You deserve to be treated with respect.

38. Has he told his family about you?

This one is most relevant once you’ve already started dating. But it’s such a huge sign of interest (and approval) that I think it’s worth mentioning. It’s even bigger if he’s from a culture where approval from the family is important.

If he’s told his family, it means he is visualizing and planning a future with you. Congrats!

  1. Is he staying to talk with you even though his friends have left?

This is a big tell. If you’re in some sort of group conversation with him and his friends, and all his friends leave but he stays – he’s probably into you. Still might not be romantic interest if you just have a great conversation and have lots in common.

An example could be when you’re at a party, and all his friends leave to get a bite to eat, but he stays with you.

40. How can you tell if a coworker likes you?

At work, It can be hard to tell if a coworker is flirting with you or just being friendly. Usually, guys play it safer at work because he doesn’t want to create any awkward situations if he would be rejected. So, he might be probing to see if you like him before he gives you any clear signs of interest.

6 ways to tell if a coworker likes you:

  1. He comes over to talk with you as often as possible
  2. He often teases you
  3. It seems likes he’s flirting, but you’re not really sure
  4. He tries to hang out near you when possible
  5. He tries to be funny when he’s near you
  6. He’s eager to do any work tasks where you work together
  7. He goes above and beyond to help you out at work
  8. He gets weird or stiff when he’s near you, but he’s normal with everyone else

I think this is super interesting, so if you have a work-related situation, write it down in the comments. I will 100% give you a reply and help you interpret the signs.

41. How do you know if your best friend likes you?

Here are 7 signs your best friend might have started liking you as more than a friend:

  1. Is he acting differently from how he usually behaves?
  2. Does he seem jealous or dismissive of other guys you might like?
  3. Is he suddenly extra touchy-feely?
  4. Is he unusually interested in your interests?
  5. Has his behavior toward you changed recently?
  6. Does he seem extra needy?
  7. Has he told you he has feelings for you?

If you’re still unsure, let me know about your situation in the comments below and I’ll do my best to help.

42. How do you know for sure if a guy friend is interested?

You can’t really know for sure if a cute guy is interested just based off of a sign in this list. But there are a few rules you can use to help you know:

  1. Is he regularly showing you signs of interest?
  2. Does he act differently to others than to you? (So he’s not just flirty with everyone.)
  3. Has he shown any particularly strong signs of interest?
  4. Can you see any patterns in his behavior toward you?

43. Are you still unsure if he likes you?

Write down your situation in the comments below in as much detail as possible. I’ll answer the most interesting comments to help tell if the guy likes you or if he’s just being friendly/flirty/mean. I’m also hoping that you can help someone else by replying to their comment – that way everyone gets something.

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Viktor is a Counselor specialized in interpersonal communication and relationships. He manages Socialpro’s scientific review board. Follow on Twitter or read more.

Go to Comments (382)

382 thoughts on “How to tell if a guy likes you: 43 signs he has a crush on you”

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  1. So, he is my English course teacher, 25, and I’m 20. I think age gap doesn’t make any problem. However, the thing is he’s very friendly, outgoing but at the same time he’s very secretive and insecure person, and I’m the one who admired and started liking him. The class is over, but how can I leave him, you know, that’s why I kept starting messages that usually related to grammar stuffs and bla2. But, sometimes, I feel like he gives me hint that he’s interested in me, like telling me that “it would be great if we camp together and talked some philosophic talk and horror stories together” “I miss youuu” “we can do speaking class if you like because my speaking becoming worse..” But what if I made wrong assumption? I don’t wanna get rejected and become awkward to each other, I prefer stay friendly each other, of course! It’s troublesome.. >.<

    Reply
  2. So I have a really large friend group and most are in my homeroom right? There are these two guys we usually talk to, let’s say one is Jacob(tall one) and the other is Zack(short one). So basically he stole my friend’s seat next to the corner which happens to be next to mine and he’s always really nice. This year he started doing this thing where he’d make me flinch and saying that he was ‘training’ me for later. Recently I noticed that even when I’m with my friends he always calls out to me to ask for something and there’s definitely a lot of teasing. I also found out that most of my friends ship me with him and that I’m a dense idiot for not knowing that, so I wanna know does he ‘like’ me or not? I’m super confused.

    Reply
  3. I supervise trustees. I have one that 43 and im 61. He always is touching the small of my back and arms. He
    has asked me to friend him on facebook. Is he intrested in me?

    Reply
  4. I made friends with a guy that works at a restaurant I go to. I asked hos name and told him mine. Everytime I used to go in and it was just him working he would always engage with taking about something. He has mentioned small things like a childhood pet, mentioned that he didn’t know what to get his mother for mother’s day and at one point told me hos last name. He complimented my car and at one point complimented my hair style if front of his boss. He’s talked about maybe going into a different type if job. When I go in and there’s a co worker he says my name without hesitation as soon as he gives me my food or says bye to me. I like him, but I don’t want to make things awkward with maybe adding him on Facebook. I wouldn’t dare ask for his number since he’s at work. I’m a bit confused as to whether he likes me or just makes friendly small talk. I wonder if I should just send the friend request or even send him a DM on Facebook or just keep liking him without engaging?

    Reply
  5. There’s this guy at work I’ve had a crush on for a while now. It seems like we flirt back and fourth some days but I can’t be 100% certain he likes me back or he’s just a nice guy. Today another guy who is interested in me was talking to me alone and the guy I have a crush on noticed and walked over to us. Does that mean he wanted to make sure he was noticed??

    Reply
  6. A nice looking, shy at first, delivery man comes to our office. He does stare, he is younger than I am but i def don’t look 15 yrs his senior. I’m slim good skin, good upbeat attitude. He has not asked for my number and I have never chased. 1. Is it possible his company forbids this in FedEx/UPS? 2. At what point to I stop flirting and accept he may not ask. Ty!

    Reply
  7. I joined a group to get this guy to notice me a few months ago. I’m really shy and he seems like he is a bit too, when I first started I found it hard to approach him but gradually we started having little conversations about music and stuff like that. In a room I can always tell when he’s looking my way and I’m usually right, he’s pretty awkward and likes to walk about checking up with people. Whenever he stops at me I think that there’s some kind of tension, he seems nervous. One day he complimented me on my music, which honestly no guy had ever done before so I was happy. He liked the song I was singing and he plays it a sometimes when I’m around. Yesterday I almost hurt myself in front of him and he text me to check up on me, he told me that when he played the song at group that day thinking about my singing. I was pretty chuffed I’m ngl. We started talking about bands for awhile but then the next day he never replied. That’s not unusual for him but it confused me a bit, I was sad. He doesn’t text anyone else in the group apart from me as far as I know, I don’t want to get my hopes up like I have in the past. I think he has some kind of interest in me but I’m not sure how far it goes because it seems like he won’t act on it.

    Reply
  8. Hi, I’ve liked this guy for a few years! This year I decided to try to make myself known to him so I joined a group he’s involved in! I see him usually once a week and straight off the bat I think he treated me differently to how he treated other girls in the group. He added my accounts on Instagram, text me about how he enjoyed my music, was shy and awkward around me. I didn’t want to push anything because of his obvious shyness so I kept attending for the past few months! (He’s always looking down and scratching his head when we talk). Yesterday he started talking to me over text about bands I like but today he’s left my messages on read which isn’t unusual for him but I’m always confused. Irl he makes small talk but somehow I always know when he’s looking at me when he thinks I’m busy and I’m always right. I know I’m probably getting my hopes up but I get the feeling he at least has some interest in me. Help a girl out? x

    Reply
  9. Hi,
    I am 7 years older than my guy colleague. I am separated and he is single.
    When I was new (5+ years ago), I was surprised when I found out that he knew my name as he always say hello (+ my name) whenever he sees me in the pantry. Then 1 day, while I was talking to another colleague in the pantry about my weekend, he suddenly butted in and was chatting with me (even after my other colleague left) about my hobby. He also recommended a book (I like reading) and said I should try reading it and we can chat about it next time. He then added me on Facebook.. He asked for my number.. He asked me to go out for coffee one day because he wanted to talk to me about a problem he was having (about his teammates at work – we work in different teams). After that day, he regularly asked me out to eat lunch with him (alone) outside the office.. It went on for a month. He also waited for a cab with me when I am going home and kissed me on my cheeks a few times. He also shared his food with me or got food from his team’s celebration to give me.
    One day, he suddenly said he has a love interest and the girl likes him back. I was surprised and kept my distance after that. He still tried (again and again.. And again) to invite me for lunch or to talk.. Up to the point that he begged that I give him 15 minutes to talk about work.. I gave him 5 minutes and he took it.
    After months of blocking him off, I started accommodating him again but not like before. We do eat out but not as often, we talk and chat but not as often.
    Then, he started being close to my friends and sister (I am working with my sister) and even bought food for my whole team (even if he is from another team) a few times. He also invites me to travel with him (and his friends – whom he said he will invite but never did). When his friends (whom he introduced to me before) invites him to meet up, he asks me to go with him. If I decline, he doesn’t push through with the planned trip or meetups anymore.
    Our friends at work often teases and pairs us together. He never ever got angry being paired with me and seems to like it? I told him multiple times that he should just tell them the truth (that he doesn’t like me) but he never does. Whenever our colleagues ask him if he likes me, he always just giggle.
    Recently, we started a work project together and when he learned that I might be taken out of the project soon, he said “No.. I want you! I want you” (pause…) “I want you in the project…”. When he found out that I was thinking of leaving the company, he told me I shouldn’t and he enumerated the pros of staying.. Then he said “Don’t leave the company… (Frustrated sigh) This is making my head hurt…”.
    He often calls me during shift even if he is working. We talk for hours (average of 3) while working.. If not, he calls me after work.. Again.. Average of 3 hours.. Sometimes 4.
    My friends at work keeps on saying that this guy likes me.. But he may be hesitating because he is worried that I will reject him and lose me. Honestly, I don’t know if it’s true but hoping it is. Is there a chance he truly likes me more than a friend? If so, how do I encourage him to make a move?

    Thank you,
    Andrea

    Reply
  10. I get on well with my neighbour. Not to the point we hang out but we usually have good conversations when we bump into each other. A couple of times he has mentioned some girl he’s seeing but always seems to be unsure of them and will say things like “guess I’ll see how it goes” when he talks to me he has the most intense stare and looks really deep into my eyes. Not in a creepy way though lol. Without prying he seems to talk about his relationship issues too. Do you think he’s just being friendly or there could be more to it.

    Reply
  11. So I’d say my guy friend has been quite flirty lately, (always calling me beautiful/ pretty/ sexy etc.) saying that he wishes I was at *insert name here* event and (he’s not from my country) suggested (in a jokey tone) that I marry him so that he can get a passport and when he explained how people change their names in his country when they get married and he used if I had married him as an example. Like to me, he seems to be laying it on pretty thick and even today when we were chatting, we were laughing with each other saying that we loved each other and blowing kisses etc. He’s also recently started to introduce me to his other friends as well. As well as matching messages and calling me first sometimes.

    But he also talks about other girls with me? Like he tells me about girls who have been flirting with him and girls that he has met in a club and flirted with for a bit in the past.

    What do you think?

    Reply
  12. So, I’m pretty confident my coworker likes me. However, I’ve also always been “one of the guys” type of girl. I’m not sure if it’s that or he really does like me and my anxiety is telling me otherwise so I don’t get hurt.

    Reply
  13. when i was new in school i meet this guy in school bus i was fall in love with this guy and he was stare at me so much everyday he stare at me so one day he came to my class and he stare at me but he never talk to me because he don’t know me so i have he was also put love song when i came in bus and he stare at me so now i have instagram & i found out he also have one day i like his post but he don’t know who is me so he check on his post and see my id and he start text me and he ask me who are you and i say my name he ask my school and he say i want to know more thing about you i say all my thing he like my post also but he did not follow me and i did not follow him too one day he ask me why you changing your profile all time and i reply him back and then he ask me we are making group you want to join and i say yes then he reply ok love yrr and then they make group but he doesn’t told me friends group so in that group he text that hello my friends and that time he start follow me on my account and i following him back that day when he follow me he was text me hi how are you and i reply him back and he never text me again till that day when he follow me

    Reply
  14. This single pastor stares at me all the time.and I always get uncomfortable. The first time was that he winked and the other time he smiled at me.there was this time I was talking to a friend he looked at me from afar and smiled.and when I looked at him i wasn’t smiling abit.and I also noticed he doesn’t like it when i don’t dance.so i decided to stay away from him cos he makes me feel nervous.and i stopped coming to his church.so tell me dose it mean that he likes me.😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊.

    Reply
  15. I had a bang today and he asked if he could have a sip and i said yeah and then he came back for another sip and my friend had took a sip and he wiped it off but when i took a sip he didn’t wipe it off, also we kept making eye contact with each other. And he kept fist bumping me

    Reply

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