How to tell if a guy likes you: 43 signs he has a crush on you

How do you know if a guy likes you?

My name is Viktor Sander. I’ve been working as a dating coach for over 8 years helping both men and women understand the signs we give when we like someone.

Here are the 43 best signs to help you tell if a guy has a crush on you or not.

1. Does he ever stare at you?

You probably know how hard it is to NOT look at someone you like. Prolonged eye contact without talking is a big tell that a guy likes you.

But to be fair, it’s common that guys stare at any girl they find attractive. And it’s an easy way for him to show his interest without having to approach you. But who knows, he might even have a secret crush on you?

2. Is he mirroring you?

Mirroring means that his body language, posture, or even what he’s saying reflects what you said or did.

Examples of mirroring:

  • When you take a sip of your glass, he also takes a sip of his glass
  • When you cross your legs, he crosses his legs
  • When you get very animated/passionate in a conversation, he also gets animated
  • When you lean in, he also leans in
  • When you laugh, he laughs

Note that mirroring is done subconsciously when he has a good rapport with you. But it can also be done consciously if he really wants to impress you or bond with you. It’s a great sign either way.

3. Has he added you on social media?

Adding you on social media means that he wants to keep contact with you and might be a bit interested in you. This is also good because now you can more easily start a conversation with him online.

4. Are his texts longer than yours?

If his texts are about the same length or longer than yours, that’s great. It’s especially good if they’re longer than yours.

If he usually gives short answers compared to you, that’s a bad sign. When you’re giving him long replies, but not getting the same in return, it means you’re probably too eager.

In that case, it’s good to step back a bit and try to match him better.

5. Is he teasing you?

Most forms of teasing (even mean teasing) are usually a sign he’s interested in you. It means he’s trying to create a flirty vibe between you and that he wants a reaction from you.

Have fun with it and don’t be afraid to tease him back! 😉

6. Is he doing the “lean in”?

If he’s leaning in toward you, that shows he wants to get closer to you (or he’s really passionate about what he’s saying). When a guy has a crush on you, it can feel like he’s magnetically drawn to you.

7. Is he getting closer to you than others?

If you’re in a conversation and you feel like he’s edging closer to you, or as if he’s almost uncomfortably too close to you, that’s a good sign. He may be attracted to you and wants to feel closer to you both physically and mentally.

Note that different cultures have different “personal spaces”. So, if he’s from a different culture than you, see how close he gets to others to see if it’s just you or everyone.

8. Has he ever offered you a massage?

This is one of the more obvious tells that a guy likes you. Offering a massage is a nice thing to do, but it’s also a smooth way for a guy to get you both touching each other. (Remember to offer him one back if you like him!)

9. Is he smiling toward you?

If he’s smiling toward you from afar, that’s an invitation to approach him. (I’m assuming you didn’t just forget to put your pants on when leaving home.)

If he’s smiling toward you when you’re in a conversation, that’s a sign he likes you. Especially if he has a light smile while you’re not even joking.

10. Is he giving you mixed signals?

Mixed signals are really tricky to interpret and can make anyone confused. But in most cases, they do mean he’s interested in you. Here are the most common reasons why he’s giving you mixed and confusing signals.

9 Reasons why he’s giving you mixed signals:

  1. He doesn’t want to come off as too eager
  2. He’s shy
  3. He’s nervous and insecure
  4. He’s afraid of seeming desperate
  5. He’s afraid you’ll reject him
  6. He’s inexperienced in flirting
  7. He’s following some weird rules or pick-up tips he’s read
  8. He’s just flirting with you (because flirting is all about giving mixed signals)
  9. He likes the attention or validation he gets from you but isn’t really interested in you

If you need help, explain your situation in as much detail as possible in the comments. I’ll reply to well-written comments and help you interpret the signs.

11. Does he give you any compliments?

Getting a compliment from a guy in your age is a good sign. If he’s giving you compliments about how pretty you are, it’s an even better sign.

It can be hard to tell a friendly compliment from a romantic one because they can sound exactly the same. To know for sure, look for other signs he’s also giving you or describe your situation in the comments below.

12. Are his pupils large?

If his pupils get large when you’re in a conversation, you’re doing something right. This one is quite subtle because pupil size is primarily determined by light levels, but secondarily attraction can also increase pupil size.

13. Is he holding eye contact with you?

When a guy has a crush on you, it can be so hard for him to keep his eyes off of you. You can notice this if he’s holding eye contact with you slightly too long.

It can almost feel a little weird or intense when it happens. And that’s great (if you like him).

Click here if you want to learn how to improve your eye contact.

14. Is he giving you a slight smile?

If you’re standing in a group, and when someone else is talking, you two get eye contact. Does he give you a slight smile?

Same thing if you get eye contact at a distance, in a park, or at a bar. A smile is an invitation to start talking. He’s interested!

15. If there’s background music, what’s his body language, and what is he looking at?

This sign is most useful at a place with some background music, for example at a bar or a club.

If he’s moving in rhythm with the background music and at the same time looking at you, that’s a sign he’s attracted to you. Dancing like that and looking at you is an inviting form of body language. That tells you he wants your attention and is trying to get you to make a move.

16. Does he straighten his posture when he is close to you?

Is he straightening his back and standing up more straight? It means he’s a bit self-conscious when hanging out near you and he wants to make a good impression.

Not that strong of a sign because most single guys want to make a good impression on attractive girls. But if you see it together with many other signs, it means more.

17. What direction is he facing in group situations?

If he’s facing you more often than he’s facing others in a group, that’s a sign he’s into you and values you more than others in the group. This is especially telling if you’re not the one talking the most in the group.

18. Where are his feet pointing?

If his feet are pointing toward you, that’s a sign in the same line as if his body is facing you. He’s subconsciously focused on you which makes his feet point toward you.

19. Is he fiddling with or straightening his clothes or accessories?

This could be because of nervosity, but it can also be because he wants to look good in front of you. It’s a classic sign of attraction.

20. What direction are his palms facing?

If the palms of his hands are pointed in your direction that signals he might be interested in you. It’s a small sign, but it’s still positive because it’s part of an open and welcoming body language he has toward you.

21. If you touch him, does he touch you back?

For example, if you touch his arm, does he touch you in a similar area later on in the conversation? If he does reciprocate your touch, that’s a great sign.

If he’s shy or inexperienced, he might not feel comfortable touching you back even if he has a crush on you.

22. Is he extra touchy with you?

A good tell he likes you is if he’s touching you unusually much compared to others.

Common areas to touch are arms, shoulders, back, hands, or thighs. Hands or thighs are usually more intimate if he touches those.

23. Do you ever have “peripheral physical contact”?

Peripheral physical contact is when some part of your bodies are in contact with each other when you are doing something else.

Example: If you’re both sitting down and your thighs are barely touching each other. Or if you’re walking side by side and he grabs hold of your arm.

This kind of passive physical contact means a lot and can build a lot of suspense and attraction. It’s the best feeling being close to someone you got a crush on.

24. Is he giving you more of his attention than he’s giving others?

The more attention he gives you, the more interested he usually is in you. Compare this to how much attention he gives to other girls also hanging out with him or in the same group as you.

Example: If you’re in a group but he seems to direct most of his attention toward you. It could be that he’s asking you lots of questions or that he’s laughing more than others at your jokes. Or just listening more intently to you.

25. Does he ever blush when you talk or get eye-contact?

He might just be shy, but he’s probably a bit extra self-conscious around you because he likes you. This makes him blush around you.

Social anxiety can also cause blushing. But it’s still a great sign.

26. Does he seem to look in your direction from far away?

Guys can be a bit sneaky when they want to check you out. They can make it seem like they’re only looking in your direction or just grazing you with his eyes. And if he has sunglasses it’s even harder to know if he’s checking you out.

So if he’s looking in your direction, especially if he does it several times, he’s probably checking you out.

27. Does he keep the conversation going when you stop talking?

What happens when there’s a pause in the conversation or if you stop talking? If he seems eager to get the conversation going again, that’s good. If he lets the conversation die out or excuses himself, he may not be that interested (unless he’s just shy).

28. How quickly does he reply when you text or message him?

A quick reply is a good sign he likes you. Also, if he replies with several texts to your one text, that’s even better.

However, if he likes you, he may also delay his replies to avoid seeming needy or desperate. But as long as he replies, it’s all good. If he’s slow to reply, it could just mean he’s busy or he doesn’t like texting, so don’t read too much into it.

29. Who texts or calls first?

Is he the one initiating contact or are you? If he is, that probably means he’s interested in you.

But if he never calls or texts first, that’s a sign of lack of interest. In that case, it can be good to take a step back to see if he will take initiative. If you’re always so quick to take initiative, he might never even have a chance to do it first.

30. How often does he text you?

Compare this to how often you text him. He’s eager if he’s texting more often than you, and you’re more eager if you’re the one texting more often. If he’s sending you several texts in a row without a reply it’s a stronger sign.

31. Does he stammer, stutter, or become awkward in a conversation with you?

This could mean that he feels shy or self-conscious around you. When a guy likes you, it’s common that he gets a bit extra awkward or stutters when talking to you. That’s because he gets uncomfortable and doesn’t want to mess up in front of you. It’s kind of cute, isn’t it?

32. Does he back off if you get a bit too close?

If he doesn’t even flinch when you get a bit too close to his personal space, that’s a sign he wants you close to him.

If you take a step closer, and he backs off by a step, that’s a sign he’s a bit more reserved toward you.

33. Does he ever talk about things he wants to do with you?

Planning or mentioning things he wants to do with you in the future is a very strong indication of some sort of interest, romantic or platonic.

Example: If you’re talking about a newly opened restaurant and they say “We should go there someday!” or “I’ll show you how amazing that place is!”

34. How does he react when you discover you have something in common?

If he’s happy, that’s good. This sign is extra strong if it’s something very trivial, like that you live in the same part of town, that you’re the same age, or that you both like pizza.

Example: You discover that you both grew up in the same city and he gets really excited about it even if it’s no big deal.

35. Is he asking you any personal questions?

If he is, that’s telling you that he wants to know more about you and is interested in you. The more he asks, the better.

Example: Asking about your plans for the future, your childhood, or your favorite food.

36. Has he asked you about your plans for the day or the weekend?

This might just be empty small talk, but it could also be him trying to open a window where you can meet again and hang out. It’s more likely it’s a sign of interest if he brings it up near the end of the conversation.

37. Is he trying to make you jealous?

This is a strong sign he’s interested in you. But it’s also a sign he’s emotionally immature and manipulative. I would avoid someone acting like that. You deserve to be treated with respect.

38. Has he told his family about you?

This one is most relevant once you’ve already started dating. But it’s such a huge sign of interest (and approval) that I think it’s worth mentioning. It’s even bigger if he’s from a culture where approval from the family is important.

If he’s told his family, it means he is visualizing and planning a future with you. Congrats!

  1. Is he staying to talk with you even though his friends have left?

This is a big tell. If you’re in some sort of group conversation with him and his friends, and all his friends leave but he stays – he’s probably into you. Still might not be romantic interest if you just have a great conversation and have lots in common.

An example could be when you’re at a party, and all his friends leave to get a bite to eat, but he stays with you.

40. How can you tell if a coworker likes you?

At work, It can be hard to tell if a coworker is flirting with you or just being friendly. Usually, guys play it safer at work because he doesn’t want to create any awkward situations if he would be rejected. So, he might be probing to see if you like him before he gives you any clear signs of interest.

6 ways to tell if a coworker likes you:

  1. He comes over to talk with you as often as possible
  2. He often teases you
  3. It seems likes he’s flirting, but you’re not really sure
  4. He tries to hang out near you when possible
  5. He tries to be funny when he’s near you
  6. He’s eager to do any work tasks where you work together
  7. He goes above and beyond to help you out at work
  8. He gets weird or stiff when he’s near you, but he’s normal with everyone else

I think this is super interesting, so if you have a work-related situation, write it down in the comments. I will 100% give you a reply and help you interpret the signs.

41. How do you know if your best friend likes you?

Here are 7 signs your best friend might have started liking you as more than a friend:

  1. Is he acting differently from how he usually behaves?
  2. Does he seem jealous or dismissive of other guys you might like?
  3. Is he suddenly extra touchy-feely?
  4. Is he unusually interested in your interests?
  5. Has his behavior toward you changed recently?
  6. Does he seem extra needy?
  7. Has he told you he has feelings for you?

If you’re still unsure, let me know about your situation in the comments below and I’ll do my best to help.

42. How do you know for sure if a guy friend is interested?

You can’t really know for sure if a cute guy is interested just based off of a sign in this list. But there are a few rules you can use to help you know:

  1. Is he regularly showing you signs of interest?
  2. Does he act differently to others than to you? (So he’s not just flirty with everyone.)
  3. Has he shown any particularly strong signs of interest?
  4. Can you see any patterns in his behavior toward you?

43. Are you still unsure if he likes you?

Write down your situation in the comments below in as much detail as possible. That way others can help you out by giving their opinion. I’m also expecting that you help someone else by replying to their comment. We need to all pitch in and help each other.

Viktor is a Counselor specialized in interpersonal communication and relationships. He manages Socialpro’s scientific review board. Follow on Twitter or read more.

Go to Comments (560)

Comments

Add a Comment
  1. Hi,
    Ok, so my boss of 3 years hardly talks to me at work unless he needs me to do something for him… very rarely gives me eye contact and barely acts as though I exist during the work day.
    For the past 3 years though, we have messaged almost every night and usually starts off by him telling me something about work. Messaging usually goes on throughout the evening until late at night.
    I am married and he has been in a long distance relationship that has recently ended.
    We sometimes hang out at my house when I organise for a couple of colleagues to pop over for food and drink. He is always the last to leave and we often sit up until the early hours of the morning just talking.
    He loves to talk about himself but also is interested in what I have to say. There is very little touching as he seems to like his personal space, however I sometimes get a hug goodbye.
    He has made it clear that he would never cheat on anyone and would never see a married woman, but I feel there is something there.
    We have never spoken about anything sexual, but recently he has told me he finds someone at work attractive.
    I’m so confused… its so difficult because he’s my boss and he’s super professional but also feel he secretly likes me. Help!

    Reply
  2. Ok so this guy is my age, we’ve been quite friendly for a few years now but recently I feel as though we’ve gotten a lot closer. I thought I liked this other guy but my friend said she noticed me acting differently around guy 1). She’d tease me saying that we’ve got a strong connection but I always dismissed it as I said I liked someone else. But in all honesty I don’t like that guy, and feel as though I might be liking guy 1. We get along really well and always manage to have a laugh together. When we’re sat across the room from each other I do find myself looking at him and at times I find him looking at me. It’s never awkward though and we do acknowledge each other and he tried to make me laugh which always works. He does seem to lean in pretty close when he talks to me, which is fine but today he seemed a lot closer than usual and it made me feel a bit funny, but a good kind of funny, you know? I’m really not sure if he likes me though or if I like him 100%, I just don’t want to ruin what we have already. I really like him, but I don’t know if it’s as more than a friend or not, I’m kinda confused

    Reply
  3. Hello ! I have this Co-worker that I worked with .. so there’s this one time we role play as gf and bf going out for dinner dates , pretending to be his gf I kept giving him very difficult situations and asking him what he would do and all and surprisingly he was so so patient with me and going along with me . There’s this one time he got drunk at work and he texted me and ask me why I didn’t wait for him and say that told me he was drunk all but then the next few days he became so cold to me .. so I tried to get his attention by being abit rude to him and he didn’t talked and ignored me that day .. when we sit down together , we will sit quite close and he will always go along with the requests I give him .. we didn’t talk often via text , even if we do our convo will only last for one day .. ( oh he just recently broke up with his gf ) need some help 🥶🥶

    Reply
  4. Hi everyone.So there is a guy in my life which I think I love a lot.My dad is a bussines man.He has got a bar restaurant and hotel and my crush works for him so I dont actually get to stay a lot with him.When there are events in my dads restaurant I get to stay more with him since my mom works in the kitchen and I go to help her too.While there are events in my dads place we smile a lot at each other we do a lot of high fives eye contacts he winks at me he stares a lot at me and teases me alot too etc etc.But the thing which makes me sad and confused is that he is 4 years older.And he also talks to other girl on his phone so Idk if he has feelings for me too or its just a normal friendship.Please leave a comment to help me <3

    Reply
  5. So there is a guy I talk to ,we chat ,we tease each other ,his family is close to mine ,his sister likes me . we are very close ,but I found out that he is in a relationship with someone,but still we enjoy talking to each other everyday ,he calls me favy and he calls me ma.I really like him but for some reason he doesn’t want to talk to me I can feel it ,its like his scared or something,so I wish you can really help me.I want to know how he really feels about me because I know he likes me

    Reply
  6. I work with this guy he’s 43 we play video games when we’re both free. I told him my true feelings and he told me he wasn’t gay and if we were cool since then we’ve been close friends. He knows I’m gay and that I like him but he goes out of his way to help me out with things. he let me borrow a phone of his when I didn’t have service cause he didn’t want me not having a phone if I was in need of help. He buys me coffee or monster energy drinks in the morning and I do the same. He makes jokes at me like I’m trying to grab his hand or how I didn’t pinch his butt. Just all around naughty jokes only towards me. Whenever I’m talking to a higher up about important business I can see him from the office just staring at me or all around I catch him staring. He’s always laughing at my jokes and I’m no where near a comedian status. We throw things back and forth at each other playfully teasing each other. When we text he calls me a dork when I joke around with him during texting. He’ll hit me up on his days off randomly asking me how’s work or watcha up to. I really like him he gives off vibes that he might closeted but I’m no expert at reading body languages. What should I do?

    Reply
  7. While I was in 1st year of my clg I proposed him.but he turned down gently.He slowed down conversing with me . I started ignoring him but he still talks to me whenever we meet and stares me sometimes and asks for some help and asks me to get a selfie together.i don’t get a proper time to ask him about this. I jus wanna know how does he feels about me. sometimes I feel like don’t wanna get into it/sometimes I wanna.

    Reply
  8. I have a crush on someone who I approached at the club and engaged in conversation with. I sent him a message after via Facebook messenger, suggesting we go out to eat sometime. He tapped my message with the heart emoji. I messaged him the next morning and to this day (2 weeks later) he has not read my message. When I saw him at the club again this weekend, I was with my friends – he was with his – and everywhere I went, him and his friend followed my group and stood nearby – as if he wanted me to see him there. I’m confused – why not open my social media message but then follow me around the club making sure I see you? The fact that he did not read my social media message makes me feel rejected.

    Reply
  9. There is a guy in my gym, who literally steal glances, staring at me. Try to make eye contact, look at me whenever he laugh. ALWAYS try to help me with my excersise and position and all But he never took any initiative in messaging me. He even flirt with me .. i don’t know

    Reply
    • Hello Kuki, I would say be patient maybe and give it some time. If you like him too then I would message him first since that sounds pretty chill for now.

      If you don’t like him like that then I’d suggest maybe keeping in touch and maybe even asking him if he likes you! I mean hey you never know right! Also, you can always just be friends.

      Hope this helps! All the best 🙂

      Reply
    • Hello Kuki, I would say be patient maybe and give it some time. If you like him too then I would message him first since that sounds pretty chill for now.

      If you don’t like him like that then I’d suggest maybe keeping in touch and maybe even asking him if he likes you! I mean hey you never know right! Also, you can always just be friends.

      Hope this helps! All the best 🙂

      Reply
  10. So there is this guy in my neighborhood that I like we have known each other for as long as I can remember our moms are friends so we hang out a lot. And through that time I have grown to have a crush on him! A couple weeks ago we were both at this dance and we slowed danced with each other. While on the dance floor the conversation went really smooth and he kept finding things that we both enjoy to talk about. And now a few days ago we both showed up a party I kept teasing him but he just laughed lightly. He really won’t talk to me after we danced. I don’t know what to do or what to think! Any advice would be great! Please!!??

    Reply
    • Hello Grace,

      I would say text him thank you for the drink. Unless, you’re scared that your husband might found out and things may go down the drain even more.

      Hope this helped! All the best 🙂

      Reply
    • Hello Grace,

      I would say text him thank you for the drink. Unless, you’re scared that your husband might found out and things may go down the drain even more.

      Hope this helped! All the best 🙂

      Reply
  11. So there is a guy of my sports team I really like. But I dont know if I‘m interpreting things or if he feels similar. I see him regularly but I dont know him that well. Once I tried to talk to him, he went away. He sometimes laughs at me and teases me. I was never really alone with him and if that happens we didn’t speak, since I’m shy and I believe he is shy too. Thoughts?

    Reply
    • I have a feeling this could be something.

      This would be a cute love story.

      I feel like you both should maybe start talking to each other more and see if that’s something that both of you may really want. Hope this helped and all the best 🙂

      Respectfully, P.

      Reply
  12. So there’s this guy I kind of work with, he’s a delivery driver for the place I work so I only see him once a week. He always makes it a point to get my attention in some way by either talking to me, scaring me, pretending like he’s going to throw stuff at me, sticks his tongue out at me just really playful or teasing. If he’s walking by where I’m at we always make some form of eye contact sometimes with a smile and sometimes even like a grumpy face to get a reaction out of me . I feel like he likes me buuut I’ve had a crush on him from the moment I laid eyes on him so I don’t know if I’m just reading too much into it because I’m hoping he likes me too. Would love some insight.

    Reply

Leave a Comment