175 thoughts on “How to deal with someone who makes fun of you or tries to dominate you”

  1. This might sound weird, but I am 61 and still deal with people/friends that hurt my feelings/put me down, ever since childhood. I know they are basically joking, but it still gets to me sometimes. These people all talk to me normally at times, call me and invite me places or to parties, etc. and sometimes even help me out. Sometimes I am able to come back at them with something but they are much more aggressive at it when there is a crowd. Then it’s like they all pretty much gang up on me and it doesn’t seem to matter if I have a comeback or not, they are just relentless and can say some pretty nasty things to me/about me. Especially if there is someone there who I don’t know or don’t know very much which makes me feel even worse because then I feel those people then tend to form an opinion about me. I even get put down by female friends occasionally which makes me really cringe. It’s one thing if your buddies do that but to me it’s much, much worse getting it from the opposite sex. The thing is I don’t know why I am always the brunt of the jokes, I feel I’ve always been a normal person (ok when I was a kid maybe I was a little weird—but none of these people even knew me back then). And I have other friends that treat me with respect and some who even look up to me. I don’t show any anger or just portray to them that I’m just laughing it off but deep inside I feel tormented. Then when I am alone I feel really bad about it. I’m not really looking for solutions because I’ve tried them all. Guess I’m just getting it off my chest because right now I feel pretty bad after being insulted by a female after another male asked her jokingly if I was going home with her.

  2. I never knew what’s is causing me harm from a long time until one day it stuck it’s my friend.
    I went to the therapist to talk but she just wants to dig more and cause more harm making me prove that it’s unreal. You don’t want to talk what is causing you harm. I would always enjoy with her because our mental abilities are just the same or if you want to call it intellectual talk. Honestly, I saw changes in me and bad changes and it really took time for me to understand the cause of my downfall.
    She is a good person, so am I right in my own way.I get involved with only few people and because she is so clingy I couldn’t ever get rid of her then even started liking the way she would treat me but I always knew it was harming my values.She never did intentionally but someone else taking charge over me is just not acceptable. She acts like my mother, toxic.
    Although once you understand then You can anytime convert to healthy by ignoring or by leaving them.

  3. My classmate always try to dominate me and I couldn’t do anything because she’s my friend’s friend. I just stay quiet and try to ignore her words.

  4. Some of the boys in my grade always say some gay comments to me or talk about me in front of their friends.
    When they see me they will ask something gay straight to my face like “kiss my lips” and other stuff and that all act gay around me like putting their butt or bending over in front of me. I don’t know what they mean or how to stop them doing those things and now more people also doing it to me.

  5. There is this girl who always make fun of me and my mum , she never give up….she is into prostitution work and believes that no one can talk to her or correct her. Each time she sees us , her fun begans and am a kind of person that things can easily hurt. Am always heart broken

  6. So I’m trying to find ways to manage a colleague who can tease/joke at others but gets upset when it’s done back to her.
    I lead the team where we work and other members have shared the same observation and frustration as I have regarding her. Some backstory: her jokes towards others are a constant (if not, daily) occurrence. The receiving party is clearly not too happy about being the brunt of the joke (who would be) but accepts it as he/she/I understand the context of the conversation and know that she did not have any malicious intent. So the receiving person just accepts it and plays along. The moment a joke is directed at her, she shows and voices her unhappiness upfront, coldly, and then proceeds to ignore you for as long as she wishes. Basically, steps you advised above. It does kill the joke atmosphere and everyone feels awkward, but everyone feels the same way – that she can do it but no one else can.

    How do I manage her without using “if people can take it when you do it, why can’t you take it when people do it to you?” – I’ve tried this before and the response was “that’s just me” or “I’m like that” or “then it’s ok I just won’t talk to anyone anymore” .

    I must say though, she is a valued team member for her work, and she is also very helpful to team members, and is generally a good friend to colleagues. It’s just tiring for her friends-colleagues to be walking on eggshells with her emotions.

    Any suggestions?

  7. Ok so I tried to talk to her today to stop teasing me. I told her how I felt when she teases me, how she should stop, but she just kept telling me to shut up which annoys me a lot. I don’t think I will ever get her to stop teasing me. She is always racist about other people too, but mostly me just because i’m Indian, which i’m proud to be, but she keeps on roasting me.
    I don’t know what I should do now.

  8. My name is Samir but people call me Sam. Yea, so i’m in 6th grade and there’s this really mean and annoying girl in my class. She kept judging me because of my shoes, she said i’m ugly, and she keeps bragging about her grades. She said she always has A’s and B’s and I have D’s and F’s. She always tries to pick a fight with me and I tried to tell her to please stop being mean to me but she does not care. She keeps on judging me just cause i’m Indian, which I am. Almost every time I tell her to stop talking to me she just keeps on talking because she wants me to hit her or something. Sometimes when she is alone, she starts to feel kinda “nervous”, but EVERY TIME she is with her friends, she starts to be mean, as usual. She keeps making fun of me and it makes me feel less than.
    I saw this today and I think it will help me talk to her to stop teasing me. Thank you for this advice.?

  9. i came across this looking for what is wrong with me. people say don’t be too nice. but then you seem rude. I don’t seem happy enough. I’m not open. I’m too open. I’m too angry. whatever! I don’t understand why today people analyze everything and take four aspects they see in someone and fill in the blanks themselves after three encounters or something

    I am insecure. but I’ve always felt like the punching bag. I try to be happy and stay positive. but this always always backfires. I end up being that one person everyone makes passive aggressive stabs at.

    then people say it’s all in my head. this is why I give up on everyone. It is just mean.

  10. There’s this really annoying boy in my class. I told my ‘best friend’ something extremely private and told her not to tell anyone, but she told that annoying boy and he told his friends and now they are all tormenting me and making fun of me. So, this helped a lot. Thnx

  11. There’s a friend in my social group that uses this phrase :
    “I don’t know why you didn’t just”
    In opposing anything anyone just did.
    My response is
    “Oh.. you don’t know? ”
    Or “You don’t know why?”

  12. I am small and often got threatened. When I was in the 7th grade a person threatened me by saying they would beat me up. I said ” What , then brag about beating up Kelly McDonnell, anyone can could do that”. They shrugged their shoulders and walked away . It worked . In grade school I would go out another door that day. All that bullying and only 2 fights. Yes I did think about killing myself in the 8th grade. It is tough to sneak out a door when you have to ride the bus which is a rolling jail at best. I think there are 4 types of people in the world, the bully the bullied the person who watches and does nothing and the person who speaks up.

  13. Viktor,

    I am using this as a safe space to vent.

    Thank you for publishing and posting this article. I found it very helpful today, I only wish I had read it yesterday before my so called adult friends pushed me over the edge. There are about 8-10 of us adult guys who often hang out with each other and are spouses are all friends. So I see these folks quite regularly. 2 of the guys have make disrespectful marks to on a regular basis in sly back-handed compliment way and one of them has made very inappropriate comments about my hot spouse. The two of them have been acting this way for over a year now. 3 of the guys have been completely respectful to me, we laugh and joke together. Then there are two guys who are completely cool guys and nice to me when we are a small group hanging out 1 on 1 or a smaller group of 3, but when we get in a large group they turn into complete assholes and feed off each other as if they were frat brothers.

    Yesterday they finally pushed me over the edge and I finally spoke up for myself. I kind of said to the group in a stern manner I would appreciate it if you would stop talking to me/about in this because I could very easily speak to them in the same manner. They all stop at that point. I really feel like the only way to earn their respect would be to show them through a 1 on 1 physical challenge (ie. wrestling, boxing, grappling, race…) or a mental challenge to prove to them that I am not some dumb ass fat pussy man they can walk all over.

    Inside I really wanted to let them have it and just trash their ego and hurt their feelings just like they had been doing to me. I have a mean hateful side that has been asleep for many years, and I don’t really want to wake it back up. I have been trying to live as better person. Why do I always make myself be the better person?

    What it comes down to is about 10 years ago I had moved from one state to another for my spouses job. In doing so I made a huge sacrifice and left a very close knit group of about 6 friends that I knew had my back and were alway respectful to me. All I need is to find one good friend, but I have yet to do so.

    Any additional feedback or advice is welcomed. I plan on trying to avoid them for a bit/weeks/a month or until the anger dissipates. I am going to use some of your strategies and comebacks when necessary. I am hoping I don’t have to completely drop my friendship, but only time will tell.

  14. My supervisor, recently started wanting to be “friends” we are the same age and have some things in common, we have hung out one on one a few times, and with her “other” friends a few times too. It is common for her to put me down about certain qualities I have, calling me “weird”, making fun of me for embarrassing things that have happened at work. I recently confronted her about this asking her why she feels like she has to put me down 1:1 and around friends, and her response was, “that’s how I joke, and my friends and family”, “you’re too sensitive, It’s funny, I was joking”. As a well as “I don’t want to have to walk on eggshells around you”, and “maybe we are very different”. I asked why insulting my intelligence and pointing out different things about me was funny to her? Her next response, was not an apology; but a “maybe I need to set better boundaries.” and “I know you like your friends a certain way and maybe I’m not that” HMMMM could she not see that is what I was exactly trying to do???? MY FRIENDS DON’T PUT ME DOWN!! YES! I have high standards for my friendships. AS I SHOULD! I realize she may have never been my friend to begin with.

    • Some people are just like that, I have been facing things like these from childhood around friend circles. I just act like what they say doesn’t get to my skin, but inside it’ll be grinding me. I feel it’s best to ignore such people. If its something like you have to work together then always have a kind response to rudeness, eventually what they say or do won’t bother you.
      Just agree to anything they say even if it sounds stupid, because by this time it shouldn’t matter, and by this time after giving many responses, you’ll be way ahead from feeling low and stuff. 🙂

  15. I am 76 years of age and only in the last 5-6 years I find people are making fun of my name,
    being Mary they start quoting “Mary Mary quite contrary”, or ” Mary had a little lamb” never never so they say “Mary is a grand old name ” These are people mostly in their 60-70-80 age bracket. I find it very disrespectful and I do not do it to other people, in fact I am always saying “what a pretty name “. I have pulled about 6 men up in our Table Tennis Group and they were very gracious about it and haven’t done it since. However when I approached a lady who said it, I said, we don’t do that here Fay, we have respect for other peoples name and I would appreciate you did not do it, she told me to “get a life” and was very angry and said “don’t you say anything about my name ” and then accused me of being angry and that she was not an angry person.
    What is going on here?

    • That lady sounds like a very troubled person. That is not a normal response.

      Sorry people are being so mean and disrespectful, it’s good that you tell them that you expect to be treated with respect.

  16. Thank you so much I’m so happy I randomly discovered this as I am the victim of a narcissistic psychopath who has called me everything bullied and tormented me on Facebook even told me to go kill myself I have tried to get help through the police and that’s just a whole other story and even said that he’s going to send his father who just got out of jail for murder to my home and my dad’s and then he goes to my family is going to destroy it and he did literally from the inside out

  17. How about a simple, ” STOP with the teasing.”
    Then walk away. Now if you are in a car… “That’s enough!”

    Or “No more!”

    Now these are stuff that worked for me!

  18. Thank you for publishing this great article! I noticed people bullying me throughout my life growing up and even recently. I’ve grown in confidence and resilience tremendously! But this article is definitely that extra cherry on top.

  19. Hi,
    I was facing bullying and lot of unecessary comments recently. First I tried to laugh it off but things really went out of my control when in an authorative voice I had to say “Stop, it is enough now!”. After that I have not talked to them and hope to keep them out of my life as much as possible. It really hurts to have received such a behaviour from a friend I trusted so much.

  20. My husband of many many years is a sneaky bully. His new favorite phrase is “who cares about that?” Or “nobody cares about that” He says this when I say something like… “the dogs are barking” or “the chairs will get wet if it rains” or my favorite ” flys are coming in the house when you leave the door open for the dogs and besides we have the air conditioner on too” And he does this daily and even leaves the house sometimes after he does it. This is just one example.

    • Hi Cece,
      I am no one to tell you what to do but still I’m sharing this piece of advice, hoping that it will be of some use to you.

      Whenever your husband tells you “Who cares” look at him sternly and say “I do” ,may be he isn’t realising that it affects you so much. If he still continues you can do something to annoy him for once and say Who cares and then ask him, “See how it feels?” Hopefully, he’ll realise and change for better.
      Hope you an amazing life.

  21. This article has been helpful to me and I plan to share it with my daughter who also struggles with this issue. I’d love more tips on how to handle workplace situations where you have to maintain working relationships. For example, how do I diffuse people who take credit for your work, or talk about others behind their backs?

  22. This has been helpful though, I needed this. I just wish there were some support group here. Thank you. forgive me if I said a lot, no one to confide it to, not even to my brothers and sisters, not even to my other kids. They find it OA.

    • Hi Uni,
      I wish there was a support group too but there isn’t and we have to deal everything on our own coz this is life. But on a positive note, with every stand we take for ourselves, we become stronger and more independent.

      If your daughter is being a jerk ask her to get out. Make her realize that you’re the kind one who allowed her to stay under your roof when she was needy. May be sometime after this display of anger you can tell her that you didn’t mean her to leave but that she’s getting too much over the head and tell her how both if you need to compromise and work together in order for things to work between you. And then make her realise how much you love her and always want the best for her.

      Again, this is just my opinion. I can’t imagine myself in the situation. But, hopefully, this advice might be of some use to you.

      Hope you have an amazing life.

  23. help me. though am trying to stay cool, my adult daughter I think is getting dominant, obviously disrespectful, though it just might be abused by words, still we argue repeatedly especially if I do not give in to what she is saying, she wants me to stop working for her 8-month-old baby, but with her character, I feel me and my autistic son will always be at her mercy. I took her in without question when she had a baby, she sees I have been working home-based, paying bills, putting food on the table, she was formerly working, and now with the small food business and also working in an international call center. When we argue her voice is higher than mine and she won’t go down or stop bickering. I am trying to keep my cool by giving her now the silent treatment, but I love my granddaughter, taking care of her from morning till say 6-7 pm and I worked from 5 am to say8am on weekdays and on weekends 5 am straight to 11 PM, she works in the morning in an office, just giving you the scenario.

  24. So , there are my few friends who got my weired photos and started trolling it on social media . And i dont like it at all

  25. There’s this kid who makes fun of me for my metal disabilities, skin color and my weight say I’m fatter than him when Im 145 and he weights 190 every time I’m in school and I try to defend my self this 6 grader jumps in my business to defend his “Best friend”..I hate being treated like crap and my school doesn’t know what the word bully even means and then I’m suspended I just want my freedom as a black girl instead of being brought down

    • Find some good comebacks & use them. Then walk away. No emotions. Bullies bully because they feel powerless in some area of their life. The energy they suck from others is the air that they breath. Find a few one-liner comebacks you’re comfortable with & deliver with no emotion. If you stick with this, bully will get bored with you & find a new victim.

      For people with learning differences, high school is probably THE hardest time in your entire life?

      Why? Because most teenagers are assholes. Blame it on under-developed frontal lobe (part of brain responsible for sound judgement & logic).

      It’s not you, it’s them. Trust me.

      Life gets MUCH easier after high school because in real life, bullies are squeezed out like the pimples they are.

      But teenagers are weird, so just hang in there & know it gets easier.

      Trust me when I say this – almost ALWAYS these bullies at the 10-year reunion, are the ones working at the gas station, Circle K etc.

      Because 99.999% of them are idiots.

      Keep your chin up & remember, it’s not a “disability” just because the medical establishment labeled it as such.

      You’re just different from the majority, and society doesn’t like “different.”

      Be happy you’re not just another robot, and hold your head up high!


  26. My one friend (we’ll call her Rosanne) I’ve known since we were kids and we are adults. I was wearing ripped leggings (that’s the design, I didn’t make them) and out of the blue Rosanne said “I don’t like those pants” in a serious tone. This didn’t bother me or maybe it did I just didn’t react emotionally right away. Then her sister in law chimed in saying “Yeah, they confuse me”. THEN I was bothered because Rosanne’s sister in law is a conversational narcissist and is fake. How could I have responded to that without being rude? How could I have turned it on her sister in law so she could see she was rude? Or both? Rosanne’s sister in law is a compulsive liar, conversational narcissist and tries to get attention all of the time or she will somehow try and get it turned to herself with an outside source.

    • I have a guy friend who gets off on putting others down (obviously, he’s got a very tiny penis & it makes it feel bigger is my guess).

      He’s usually a pretty nice guy, but after a few drinks the demon comes out.

      I used to get offended. He’d say things like, “Damn, you’re fat,” “What in the hell happened to your hair?” or my (least) favorite, “You’re so fucking old.”

      Don’t get me wrong, he has some very strong friend qualities, hence why keep him around.

      He also had some major damage to his head while serving in the army, after which his “filter” dwindled significantly.

      I wasn’t used to someone talking to me this way so understandably, had a very hard time with it.

      Then after some research & observing how he treated others (same) I realized it WAS him. And learned how to let it bounce right off me.

      One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned in life so far – other people’s shit is other people’s shit. Not mine.

      So, my long answer to your question … but in summary, let me tell you exactly how I’d respond to your friend’s comment re: your pants.

      “Really? I’m sorry.” Change subject.

      When bullies don’t get energy from their victims, or worse … when made to feel like the bumbling idiots they are when someone calls attention to their mean, insecure comments or better … ignores them … they move on.

      I have a friend who’s a bully type. Used to bully me until I figured out how to make him look like a dick.

      He told me until that time he enjoyed getting me all riled up, stopped only after I gained his respect. I see him do to others all the time and have to laugh.

      Deep down inside though, as most bullies are, he just uses as a facade to cover up his insecurities (and there are MANY). You’d never n

      Think about it – authentically confident people don’t cut others down, they build them up.

      I honestly pity the bully type, because no accident how they got there (lack of control, powerlessness, bullied by someone else – mother, father, siblings etc).

  27. It really hurt when those you see as friends make fun of you or degrade you. I believe it’s part of life…. Let it flow over your ears like water.

  28. I told them a fact, they didn’t think it was true so they kept making fun of me, but they’re scared to look it up in case they’re wrong. I know I was right because it’s a FACT that is true, but they are now bullying me and escalating things to a more upsetting level, they called me retarded, and said that the reason I left school is because they they only want smart kids.

  29. So I have 2 toxic friends. One always thinks she is so funny, and all the girls laugh. She legit laughed at lettuce! Its not funny, but that’s how much she manipulates the group. And then she acts nice when its just me and her, but with others, she is so mean!

    Then my other friend is so mean! He doesnt care about my feelings, amd not about me. He says we are friends, but doesnt act like it. He said i was annoying, bland, and only sometimes cool. And he knows that hurts me, because I told him I have low self esteem, and I used to suffer from deppression, and I told him I was fixing myself.

  30. I am thinking about moving schools, and I really hope that three is not a bully, but it is best to be prepared. This website really helped me. Thank you.

  31. I have a communication issue like this with my younger sibling. Granted that as children, I was probably a bully sometimes and we didn’t get along in general. In adulthood, it’s become worse, talking to her creates a defensive barrier where she always says that she doesnt remember what she said or I’ve said and will bully me with insults and go in circles to get her way or make things an arguement about her feelings rather than answering a yes/no question.
    I don’t know if this bullying scenario applies. I’ve used this bully remedy on friendships/acquintances… but if someone is closer and more menancing in life, as in they live with you or they won’t back down from an arguement…. like what can you even do?

    • When we are innocent and people do such crazy behavior, one way is to pass it to God, to guide these toxic persons.

      You haven’t done any bad thing, so try to relax and know that they are the bad guys, they need to see a doctor.

      Please call cops the next time. Or talk to the manager about security that doesn’t defend you.

  32. Tonight I have been out to a public place where a lot of people were. A man whose wife or partner teamed up to come and bullied me and harrassed me and humiliated me by saying that I owe them money. Its a dispute matter that I dispute this firm because they are not worth a cent because I never received any of the products I asked for on time, they bullied me in their office when i came in to order my things. Two women including this one whom I saw tonight at the same where I went .. they teamed up to bully me and they are the most horrible women I have ever come across with. This man yelled out to everyone in the room where I was to humiliate me in public. I called for security and they came and did nothing to this couple because they told them that I owe these two money. I was horrified and I almost lost my cool. This man came and sat right next to me and said my name. I said do I know you ? He said something about his woman that I owe her money. I said I dont owe anyone any money. He persisted that I do and I said to him … Then go away and leave me alone .. he kept on talking to me and I was feeling his motive was to come to harrass me and I called the security. He stood up with the security and yelled out that I owe him or her money .. and the security did nothing but listen to this man and woman’s crap and rubbish. I was annoyed but I knew hes a nasty man with no brains but a mouth like a coward .. I came home feeling very hurt and confused and I thought the security did nothing. This is in Christchurch. Bullying, Harrassing, Hate from this woman Jacki Dunn who works for Microfilm and her short manfriedn and they were the horrible couple teaming up nasty against me .. so I am wondering what i can do next when i see them or her or him ?

    • saman
      When we are innocent and people do such crazy behavior, one way is to pass it to God, to guide these toxic persons.

      You haven’t done any bad thing, so try to relax and know that they are the bad guys, they need to see a doctor.

      Please call cops the next time. Or talk to the manager about security that doesn’t defend you.

  33. How can I come up with a comeback phrase with the MOOOOOOOOOOVVE cow thing. I’m very skinny but they still call me a cow

  34. A freind in case I thought is my Life Partner
    First 15 years it never came to mind, this stage will come, afterwards I realised I realised he was Nice to me till he needed me .
    Problem is if i confront he may say that was never the case, even though i can give specific example, as suggested earlier
    Now i am used to this formal relation
    I wish to revive old friendship ( If it existed)

  35. U asked above to leave a incident of bullying
    I have my personal experience today that made me end up here today

    I was at school…we had met after about a month and my friends were casually asking which stream I was going to pick up and then a friend (I don’t if she is fake or real) said that “aren’t you Taking commerce without bio?!”and then hahaha all over spread.Again when I asked a good friend as if we had to bring up the marksheet of 10th STD(I didn’t knew that I had to bring it up for registration and I didn’t bring it) and then she said “go,go,you won’t get admission here,go,go” as if she was saying that to animal,I felt so much guilty about myself then.
    This is the most casual incident,many big pranks and jokes often happen with me,but today it was unbearable so I ended up on this site

    I really thank u so much from my inner heart (I can’t even explain my feelings right now,it comforts that way)….u are amazing guide for the bullied ones

    Just love you
    With lots of love

  36. Thanks for this article.In many ways, I relate to this .I feel this may come in handy in such tricky situatiuons in future.

  37. Hey, great article. In many ways, I relate to this. I’m actually a student. And there’s this guy that comes to my friends and tries to tell jokes about me. This guy has always tried to ruin things for me and I really want him to stop coming to my friends and making fun of me. He has a friend that comes to me and my friends and once he told my friends that I had put a flashlight up in my a**. Even tho it’s not true. One of my friends laughed at it but I don’t think he understands that it’s not funny for me. I would say he’s a bully because each day he tries to make my life worse.

    • When i was a student there were both kind and toxic guys.

      My trick was to join nice people and avoid stupid sick persons.

      They have big problems in their personal life, so they reflect that in their personality specially at school.

      1-Be arround nice persons and cut bad relationships
      2- Ask friends to support you (Or find true supportive friends)
      3- and know that as you get older, toxic people will be really less than what you experience at school (this is my experience)

      I used to be joked at school. Even bullied by some family members. But when I got older, (like after 25), they started to pay more attention.

      Toxic people never finish, but i believe it is us that change and can learn to protect ourselves more and more

  38. I got in a fight with my friend because she said I asked too many questions and I was annoying her all the time when I did that.
    She kept saying I was asking what color Jeans she wanted us to wear for the picture and I was confusing the whole wedding party because I asked this. Then she told me it’s bad to get so specific with details.
    I asked her afterwards, since I thought she was giving me the cold shoulder, if she was dropping me as a friend. She got really mad at that and now she’s not talking to me.
    It has been about 2 weeks and I keep reaching out to her but there is no response. I told her that I apologize for the way I yelled at her but that I wont apologize for asking questions.
    I value our friendship but now she isnt even talking to me.

    I used to be a very social butterfly but now when I am in groups I stay quiet and dont say that much.
    She has also been dismissing me in front of her friends which I didnt appreciate.
    I work from home

    • Hi Shanthi. We all humans are different. I used to have a friend that I was whit each day. But the problem was my friend started to get violent and wasn’t the friend I used to have. Then he found a new friend and then they just told me that they didn’t wanna be whit me anymore. And 1 whole year I was jealous and sad that they just left me. The worst part was when I saw them having fun and etc. But after 1,5 years I saw that they were just idiots and I’m really happy that they stopped being whit me because maybe I would have become toxic as them. Anyways my point is that we beginners don’t know what a bad friend is. And its really hard to find good friends. I recommend you thinking if shes really worth it. If she’s not wanting to use her time replying to you. Then what’s the point of wasting your energy on her when you can go and find someone else to be whit.

  39. this person im not friends with makes fun of my name randomly when they see me and talks to their friends about it. they pronounce it weirdly on purpose, heck i didnt choose my name. i try to say something back but i still feel like im on the lower end in that situation. ifeel really bad and insecure and depressed after it but i hope i can make this article help me.

    • Just say ‘Yeah. I get it. My name is funny. Haha.”

      That always works for me when people comment about how short I am.
      I say ‘Yeah. I get it. I’m short. Haha.”

  40. I have a friend and colleague who I work with. She will be pulling faces and making actions in front of her friends and insighting then to laugh at me and join her in making me the butt of the joke. She normally does this when I’m getting to know people in the group and people start liking me.
    It’s frustrating because I really like her and enjoy working with her. But her behaviour is disgusting.
    Just this past Friday I went on sight to see a client with her. She did not stick to agreed meeting place and ended up phoning me every x3minutes like I was an idiot. I told her to go ahead and to give me the address.
    Eventually I got there and I was calm. She felt stupid. I could see that by her behavior. After the meeting I spoke to her about the client and she cut me off. I thought wow! What’s happening here Miss Rudie

  41. I have a coworker that acted nice until one day. I asked her if she was available for a weekend thing for girls, because she was acting she was always bored blah blah blah. I guess she took that as me crossing some boundary. She began to be nasty, but one day at a time. Not all the time. Then another coworker invited us out. I was having a drink with champagne, and I’m not a drinker and my eyes got watery. She began to point at me a laugh, saying her cousins would laugh so hard at me. For what, not being a drinker!? I said a few times, “Is am not a drinker.” In a low voice and this disarmed her. I continued to eat and acted as if nothing had happened. Absolutely the best defense!

  42. Hi

    One of my colleagues always tries to pass snide remarks at me. She is nice sometimes but then she will slip very hurtful things somehow in the conversation. I also have noticed that she will make my friends, her friends and somehow after that my friend would start to be mean to me as well.

    I have started to become terrified of any social event at my workplace. It had been going on for more than 2 years and at this point I am so nervous that I either opt out of going to any social things or I am super anxious at the event which makes it not only super uncomfortable but also my tendency to say something stupid increases.

    Please help!

    Thank you

  43. I told my husband to not degrade embarass or humilate me its hard already having to be a Mum for years but he hates it when I stand out at something or get a little bit of validation elsewhere. Anytime I win something or stand out at anything. Distrespectful never apoligizes. He wants to do only the best for other people but never for me his wife the kids ?? He sleeps in the spareroom as I asked him to cause I’m ignoring him but he doesnt seem to get the message. And keeps on breaking me down whenever he can. Especially in front my children…hurts me I live a life if isolation in a new country and decided to join the gym cause I now have deep depression grief and miss interaction. So started winning little prizI won little prizes at the gym for various functional training also for bringing a positive vibe at the gym…but the only response I got from my husband was I should let others win so they can feel better about themselves too…
    Please help

    • He does not sound like a good man. You deserve to be treated with love and respect.

      I’d suggest marriage counseling, and if he is unwilling to change, you may need to prepare to leave him.

      And congrats on your prizes, you are worth every ounce of attention you get!

    • Give him a really good response that shuts him up. For example
      Him: You should let other people win so they can feel better about themselves
      You: Mm true. Its not like you have a chance against me anyway

    • Hi, I have Friend whom I confided her in my problems. I consider her a very close Friend. But I later found out she actually discuss my problem with her ‘gay’ friends and she tells me that her ‘friends’ thinks I’m weird and stupid after gossiping about my problems. I was upset at first but I thought she is my Friend and she do not have bad intention so I continued to confide her in my other problems hoping to get some advice. And again she says the person who criticises me thinks I’m stupid for putting myself in situations. She always says someone else says I’m stupid or this person thinks I’m stupid.
      Can some one please tell me what should I do? Thanks.

  44. I’ve got a friend, my supposedly boyfriend who at times use words rashly on me. I’ve actually screwed up everything we shared severally so I think that’s the reason for his actions.I just sometimes lock up without no argument only to return 2 months later to say I’m sorry. I think it’s his actions that make me behave like that sometimes but at other times he’s got nothing to do with it I’m only being a douchebag. Right now I’m trying to see if things will work out for us and I’m really willing to put in my all to see ị don’t mess things up again. I’ve been the one initiating our chats often and when I talk to him about this he says I’m talking from my ass. The last time he said I don’t just expect things will go back to normal after my every fuck ups. I decided not to start a chat with him or call for 3 days and he didn’t blink. And when I eventually said hi this morning, he turned the table around saying stuffs. Ps:the last time something similar happened, I visited him and wasn’t cool with the reception I got. When I came back, I tried talking about it but then I decided not to just to be sure I observed right. I didn’t talk to him for a month and he didn’t reach out too. When I eventually thought I should break the silence, he said he was really angry with me making me the bad one, saying I don’t know what love is and there’s something obviously wrong with me. Note that since then I’ve been trying to be my very best by constantly keeping in touch but he most times he talks to me rudely. Do you think I this relationship can work?
    If no, pls suggest how I can go about it without using words rashly on me. Thanks.

  45. Thank you. This was really helpful, when you’re not that of a social person and encounters such situations and it all becomes awkward (Me!)

  46. Kind of sad. I’m the butt of my boyfriends jokes. He plays poker for a livingI go with him I sit behind him which automatically gives him the hand up. He has to carry control. In everything conversations… . (I get all dolled up)In his eyes, but in mine I’m just getting ready for the night. Anyhow, he depicts me as a dumb Blonde, when in actuality I am a successful business owner a few times over. I’m at my wits end with how disrespectful he is to me in front of others. One on one he’s nice so I hold onto him being nice again. Nice just doesn’t cut it though. I never thought I’d end up here. It’s quite odd to be in this predicament.

    • He does not sound like a good person. Have you talked to him about it? Because his behavior is unacceptable and you deserve love and respect. Your partner is supposed to lift you up and make you feel good. He’s just pushing you down.

      Being nice 1-on-1 just means he is fake. Good people are nice almost all the time, regardless of the situation or company.

  47. I work in a frozen retail supermarket! This customer came in and made a really creepy joke, every time he comes in, he thinks he’s really funny and then he tries to goad me and I just ignore him! If I could come back with a dry wit or a remark that would stop him, then I would try that! But what do I say?

  48. I honestly need help, like a lot. I have this friend were she is always so nice and stuff, gets me anything I want, y’know? But… Once we’re with other people, she starts trying to make the others laugh by making fun of me. My comebacks are literal trash which always makes her.. how do I say this? Makes her win?? I guess. I honestly don’t know what to do anymore, I cherish her friendship a lot and she’s a wonderful person. I know she doesn’t mean it, but she just forces it. When I told her how I felt, she said “I don’t really care.” And I was like… Wow. After school I told my (other) friend about what happened, she told me that the other girls always make fun of her behind her back, which made me feel bad. I hate feeling bad, especially for people who disrespect me. So my question, how do I tell her I don’t want to be friends with her in a way where she will regret ever making fun of me?

    • Ignore her. No contact. No warning. Just leave her to her own consequences. Only try again if you value her friendship but with tough love.

  49. There is this guy, he’s sort of like my friend, sometimes he’s really sweet and sometimes he puts me on the spot and it feels like he is daring me to do something or to say something, and I kinda like him when he’s sweet but sometimes he asks confusing questions from me, it’s very weird because I don’t really understand if he likes me or not it feels like he is always testing me at something…can you help me out with this, thanks.

  50. I’m awful at cricket but what to do if a boy doesn’t let you bowl and gives you batting at the last or second last just because he plays well

  51. Parent, co-worker, boyfriend dominate personalities; She/Parent for 32 years said my features not good, No, one won’t be around me. Worst, Co-worker slapped my hand year ago. Didn’t put’ hand on her before nor, after. Boyfriend said I’m not good person’. I lended thousand, six -hundred dollars he didnt pay back. Something wrong with picture.

  52. I have a boy who likes boys and embarrases me in front of my friendsa nd i called him baled headed and he said he was gonna pull my hair off what di i do!!!!!!!!!?????????

  53. I have one friend, who always makes me feel stupid whenever I do something “wrong”. I accidentally called a learner’s permit a driver’s permit, for example. She was like, “Greyyy, honey, you know there’s no such thing as a DRIVER’S PERMIT, right?” and proceeded to laugh. I don’t ever know if she is trying to help me, or trying to make me feel stupid.
    I also said once that it was sweet when somewhat famous people took time to look at fanart or fan letters from people, such as Thomas Sanders, or The Dragon Prince writers. She proceeded to yell at me about how most famous people are busy, and how she HATES when people make out the ones who reply to everyone to be better than the rest. Did I say that? NO. Was I too scared to tell her what I meant? Yes.
    If anyone can help me decide how to deal with her, that would be great. And please don’t say “block her out”, because I’m running out of friends, and we have been a duo since 2nd grade.

    • Hi. I think, like the article hints at, bullies are looking for a reaction, which she must be getting for her to keep doing this to you. If you can change your reaction so she no longer gets her fix, you probably could solve the problem and still stay friends. Try some of the methods listed above. Either that or you confront her, as in Step 5 of the article. I’m sorry your friend is treating you like this and I hope you get it sorted out amicably. Cheers, Sadi

  54. I have these 2 people in my class and they make fun of my retainers. Wearing retainers is a very common thing and i know a few of their friends who wear retainers too. So i have no clue why they think it’s alright to make me feel self conscious of doing the basic thing called speaking, or expressing my joy through smiling. Its very faustrating

  55. I sit in band class and just mind my own buisness and sometimes talk to my best friend and one time I realized that this kid in my class was staring at me and i’ve never talked to him before.ANd he would wave at me and say hi and bye to me and I dont know what is going on. Also he has a friend who sits next to him that whispers to him and the friend is someone who I like and I think that they are making fun of me or something but i’m not sure. One person told me that he likes me and the other said that he makes fun of me. I havent been the same in that class becasue im always self concious. I really dont know if there making fun of me or something else.

  56. I’m a student staying in a room with my three roommates. They always make fun of how I’m always quiet and how I don’t talk.They even said I’m a dull person. Sometimes it makes me feel so bad that my heart aches
    My coursemates too and people I call friends make fun of me. They see me as someone who can’t stand up for herself in any case because I don’t talk. They say I’m wierd

  57. I have this women at work who always stands in front of me when we are in a group conversation when I move she will just find another way to stand in front of me. Also comments on how I dress as she is a personal stylist but always negative to how I dress it’s really hurtful what should I do ?.

  58. I’m a freshman in high school. I’m fine with almost every class and am even fine with sitting alone at lunch since my REAL friends are not in my line. However, there is another student who i label as a “friend” that always makes fun of the clothes my mother paid for and the sports im blessed to be able to participate in. It is ALWAYS in a group of people and other friends and sometimes he even humiliates me in front of people i dont even know. Any time i try to make a comeback or to ignore him he always laughs and gets others to join in and makes me even more frustrated and ashamed. There is also one more friend who constantly tries to smack, slap, punch, kick, hit me in front of people regardless of where we are. He takes me things and throws them on the floor, and because im a relatively chill and down to earth guy who tried to ignore things like this, he repeats this every single day and it’s beyond angering. Between the two of these people, i dread 2 of my classes and wish i could skip them altogether. I would genuinely appreciate any advice to help with this specific situation, as im sure im not the only person going through these things.

  59. So I’m in a dance group and a certain girl always make fun of my dancing and laughs and teases me of my dance in front of my other teamates I don’t like it what do I do?

    • Hi Emily. That sucks and it’s not acceptable behavior from her.

      May I ask how old she is? And what have you tried so far?

      One thing you can start to do is to try to get everyone else on your side. Become friends with the others and tell them how it makes you feel when that girl makes fun of you. That way they will back you up and everyone will think she’s an asshole. But it depends on how mature they are.

      • She’s 13. So I tried to talk but I couldn’t because it’s complicated her sister is the dance teacher and she does nothing about it. She just laughs with them. I don’t know how to be friends with them because it’s like they all don’t like me. I do this dance group for god that’s why I’m still in the group. Thanks for your help.

  60. I’m going to try the last method with my mother in law tomorrow. I’ve talked with my husband about my frustrations of her dominating my house while she visits, and am looking to respectfully establish it back. She’ll be here for a whole month so it’s best it gets done ASAP ??

  61. I have a work place “funny guy” bully. I tried ignoring him but it turned to passive aggressive mumbles and glaring at me 30 minutes before his shift through the window as he sits outside in his car with the lights on. I took this to Management and “funny guy” used that he was a person who use to help people and that he could never be rude. He turned it around and said I was someone not to be trusted because I told our manager he was being rude. I can’t get over that the manager sided with him and told me that “I’ll get use to him.” I’m not sure how to handle this situation. I’m not someone who can confront people easily.

    • Start with a window shade for those 30 minutes.
      When he mumbles, ask him “Excuse me, I did not hear you. What did you say?” Practice. Show no fear.
      Then quietly keep a log of the factual details of his worst actions/behavior according to your direct experience, the date and time, witnesses, the end result and how it negatively impacted you/the workplace. Put it on the list then let it go and instead focus on doing great work. Eventually, privately, take this list to HR.

  62. Thanks for your wonderful article. I will practice one or all the steps you mentioned. However, I had a situation when I was at loss how to react. My classmates and I were having a casual conversation with our professor. When one of my friends remarked that I drive motorcycles, my professor quickly snapped that I was a little headed one and that I didn’t have enough courage to even question anyone who hits my motorcycle accidentally. He also added that I was not even fit for driving motorcycles. He did not only behave as a funny guy but also teased me in front of my friends. He made me feel like I was a total dumb head. Can you tell me how could I have possibly reacted in this situation?

    • For the motorcycle thing, I’d use the ignoring – so after the mean comments are over, pretend you didn’t hear them, don’t show any emotion and just continue where you left off, maybe repeat the fact that yeah you drive motorcycles it’s awesome, and continue the original conversation.

    • Laugh,exaggerate,and return.
      – Ha ha ! Yes,you’re right professor.When I approach on my motorbike, all my neighbours hide they children in their basements and my doctor is informed in advance.I’m hopeless.
      – By the way,Do you still drive that ancient Volvo, with a wooden dashboard which takes up 3 parking spaces.

  63. While the work place bully you can leave at work, I’m dealing with family bullies. We have a mother when interrupts conversations will physically put her body in the way while you are working i.e. Take over the sink while you are at it doing dishes, push you out of the way while you are cooking or rearranging furniture and claiming a common family place as theirs. This mother even bullies the DOGs by taking away their beds and throwing them outside when they have always been in door dogs. She’s a menace to our community as well. Is a massive gossip machine and a Debbie downer. She’s associated to social media and will follow family members around reading aloud the comments she’s posted and the bad news from the world after you’ve confronted them to stop.

    I’m 40 yrs old and she will pick on me in public… telling other adults ” “can’t take your kids anywhere… quit being a toddler… you dress like you are 4. …” often making references to immaturity and said de mouth comments.

    We have a toxic bully with serious narssisitic personality disorder and bi polar.

    Any advice on these kinds of bullies?!

  64. I do have met some of those kinds of people in my friend’s group and one of them was my closest friend he was trying to fit into the group by talking about me since I am the main character in this group ,, I treat what I though my friend by ignoring the whole group and since they where all of them in the same category and I did find other people they where respectable people and that group still talking about me and i start new chapter with new people ,,, I did get some offers from some of them to go back with the group by apologizing and I did act like nothing happen I am busy doing my staff and meet people who I call them my friend and they are since they share the same view about the old group ,,,,,, guess what happen to the old group ,,, they end up each of them eating each other and all of them end up alone,,, and one of them came to me blaming me for destroying the group ,,, but I did nothing just leaving them ,,,, the old freind try to contact me and nothing work out since his freind left him alone ,,,,,, He broke my respect by not giving me respect I give to him and I that is ok since I became stronge with confidence after this experince and I don’t feel sad about that ,,,,, ,,, In conclusion who is bad will appear bad sooner or later they been as product of their actions and they desrve it ,,,,

  65. What if the person who does this is usually a nice person but they have some sort of malfunction that causes them to lash out at you and you feel hurt by it and they wont acknowledge it? And you try to tell them that they hurt you feelings but they ho like ‘yeah but you were acting stupid so I have to correct you so you wont be stupid next time’. so basically when you did everything in this article but they still have the upperhand and the boss is condoning their behavior. what to do then, besides finding a new job?

    • I found a new job. I worked for a medical group and they hired a new manager. There was no way getting around their behavior and the corporate medical heads didn’t seem to think the actions were appropriate.

      So I quit.
      Took them 6 months to fill my position.

      Go where you are loved. Not tolerated.

  66. This sounds like its gonna work i can’t wait to try it out. Everyone in my school mostly the boys make fun of me because I have ADHD. they are rude about it and say things to trigger me. I try to laugh it off but in the moment I straight up want to go back home and wish i never went to school. Everyday its a different struggle. Each day I face there immaturity. But every time this one specific person says something about it, other kids laugh and catch on to it and then they all say it to me. Everyone has a little bit of it in them I just want them to realize that it may not seem like its affected me when I’m with them, but deep down it hurts me, even to think about. They are boys they think they are funny and think what there doing is ok. I try to let them know how obnoxious and immature it is to make all these different sayings and meanings up but they don’t give a shit its frustrating.

    • Hang in there! High school is a blink in our lives. I graduated over 22 years ago and the pains of dealing with mean kids is still very real. My best advice, become a book worm and dedicate your time to education. My bullies started to fall offf the radar when I’d go be them the middle finger over what ever book I was reading. Soon, they gave up and moved on to other targets.

      Having a strong skills or an outlet is s important. I was lucky to have martial arts as an option at my high school. In 9th grade so signed up. Being able to resist weak minded people (people who single out and pick on others are very weak minded and brittle people in my world) mentally and physically did wonders for myself esteem.

      Just knowing I could now one thing f those jerks down with my fist made me emotionally stronger.

      Take it on the chin, and give them one right between the eyes by being more successful and interesting then those bothering you.

      Best of luck.

    • Really liked the article and will definitely put it to use. My friends always make fun of me in the group it’s like I’m the punching bag. They don’t want to hurt me but it always ends up on me. Just today jokingly they took a hard object and throw it on me it hit my head and none of them seemed sorry … I’m so frustrated with them I just want to leave everything am done go home

      • I used to have this. A way to deal with it can be down to the way you respond to jokes and teasing. One thing you can do is not react to that sort of thing anymore. They need to respect you.
        It might be easier just to get a new group. The others might bond together by bringing you down, which shows you are not seen as an equal. In that case just get out of there.

  67. I read all of the stuff and its great but how can you deal with or do it when you’re being made ridiculed online like social media? I think there should be an article like this on how you would deal with it over the internet especially social media.
    For example you have these “friends” that used to make ridicule of you back in school, and this ridiculing stuff is also happening in social media, ridiculing whatever you post or anything you say in chat online?
    How can you deal with this and prevent other future related stuff from happening over social media?
    I don’t meet them anymore as they already have jobs, but they still have this ridicule old mindset when it’s about me. I need this to stop, it’s not BANTER, I can always block them or deactivated my account and make a new one but if ever they find me they would just ridicule insult me again or try to influence others about me so it’s not probably going to solve the problem.

  68. This is just beyond brilliant. I wish I would’ve found it sooner, though I’m happy I finally found it.

  69. Put a name on the bullies behavior, “I think you are ridiculing me, most people would find this insulting”.
    In a macho culture its common to ridicule and put shame on people that talk about their feelings. So be prepared to put a name on this behavior as well “does me talking about my feelings make you teatralic”.
    If this doesn’t help, go into what about the persons tone/body language makes you uncomfortable.
    If they persist (you will have made them angry by now) tell them they are behaving threat full and that this is illegal. If they still persist ask them why they want you to file a police/HR report!
    You should now have enough material to file a report to the police or HR department.

    • Geat post. The main article is good but if the situation is a serious targeting of the individual, those responses will not work.

      If your the target (and that what it is) and it continues then this posters advice is the best. The situation requires a serious response and have you to raise the stakes to keep this person from targeting/dominating you. They will say “I was only joking” but don’t blink, don’t let them off the hook. Document it and make a mental note of who was present at the time. Also, do not rely on human resources. They don’t want to hear about it. In their eyes your just making waves and complaining. Don’t bitch about it to other employees either that someone is picking on you.
      They don’t want to hear about it either.

  70. If someone bullies you or says some stupid shit you dislike and makes you feel uncomfortable.. take your dominant hand, make it into a fist and proceed to place said fist into the face of your bully. Job done.

  71. Another good trick is to play dumb and make them explain the joke. Whatever they say look right at them and say that makes no sense. Could yoy explain it another way? Jokes lose their power when you have to explain them. Guy next to me at a bar one night said to the woman i was talking to Wow you’ve got great DSL. I could tell by her immediate reaction that it was as inappropriate. I said to him with my poker face she uses WiFi. Awkward silence with eye contact and he turned around and walked away. Got a free beer for that one.

  72. When i was in school this guy try to get me to say My Dixie Wrecked by reading it off a piece of paper. I knew what he was up to so when he said hey Justin read this out loud. I said My Dixie is Wrecked. No that’s not right there’s no is there. I know that but it’s grammatically incorrect. All poker face on me. No read it as it is written. Why it’s wrong. He kept trying and eventually gave up. My teacher said that was the funniest thing he ever saw.

  73. I would like to know how to ignore my ex-girlfriend who is constantly making fun of me at school, more or less with her friends, I have tried to ignore her, but it doesn’t work. Is there something else I can do?

    • Own it bro. I was out at a bar one night and my ex was there with her friends and one of them shouted there goes needle dick. They laughed and with a poker face I said yea all of you know that. Not like it’s a secret. Ex said you can fuck off now. I was until you ladies held me up. Go fuck yourself Justin! Twice a day in the bathroom. I got good at handling hecklers doing stand up comedy in college.

  74. Always throw in their mother.

    Funny guy: “So what movies do you like, except for pornos? Hahahaha”
    You: “That’s not what your mom says.”
    Funny guy: “…

    Funny guy: “Wow! Ever heard of ironing your shirt? Hahahaha”
    You: “I’ll be sure to mention it to your mother when she does my laundry tonight.”
    Funny guy: “…

  75. I partially agree with the post, but being complacent does not work with everyone. Some will say, “Look, everyone, what I told you, he’s a loser!” The best solution I found was shouting like a psychopath: “Fuck, shut up!” And if someone, like your boss, calls you for an explanation, simply say “I was kidding, but he / she couldn’t take it” since no one was playing in the first place. Then, most people will be on your side, because anger is contagious. Also, I would suggest to start persecuting the person, and he will be afraid, believing something is wrong with you.

  76. Hi I have been married for almost 30 years and recently divorced. Being around my ex husband who is so passive
    Aggressive and dominating has made me very ill and I had
    A sick baby who is thankfully growing up, I am in the process of trying to get away from him but I have this child and we
    Had a business together. Definitely moving forward to get totally away from him as much as it is possible. He is very
    Nasty and rude to me in a sneaky kind of way sometimes he is explosive if I tell him how I really feel. What can I do to try to take care of myself in the process of getting away from him?

    • When he starts getting really nasty just start recording it with your phone. It will drive him crazy to think that he might have to listen to himself being truly mean and nasty.
      This used to instantly shut my ex up.

  77. I’ve always been center of laughter. I don’t care tough, but sometimes it gets more embarrassing. I usually laugh with them , but in the end I feel like a looser. I think I should try this next time.

  78. I am in high school, and my partner for a project makes fun of my name, body, and says i am a suck up to the teacher. I have tried to switch project partners, and even classes, but the school and my teacher wont let me. I cant take any more of his treatment to me, and i have tried to do these things over and over again but i cant, what do i do?

    • You could contact the county school board to resolve the issue. Or, if it gets bad enough report the individual for harassment at the local police department and then request a restraining order against them. That would legally require the person to stay away from you at a certain distance at all times. I imagine the school would have to comply, but likely it would be the bully’s responsibility to work with the school to make sure they are not placed with you so that they do not violate the restraining order. It may sound dramatic to file a restraining order, but what this person is doing to you is harassment and you don’t have to take it. If the school isn’t listening you have legal options to take care of the issue.

      Also, remember that someone who chooses to bully you is not so much about a personal weakness on your part. Rather, it’s about the bully having poor personal character, and choosing to act as a social predator. People with normal to decent character don’t pick on other people for fun.

      God bless.

      Acts 2:38-41
      “38 And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 For the promise is for you and for your children and for all who are far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to himself.” 40 And with many other words he bore witness and continued to exhort them, saying, “Save yourselves from this crooked generation.” 41 So those who received his word were baptized, and there were added that day about three thousand souls.”

  79. I sent that last comment as a test of your skills. I do not think you are a moron. Your English is pretty good considering you are not from the United States.

  80. I’m grounded. In situations where I sense that either someone is being domineering, whether inadvertent or not, I stick to my guns, get what I want, whether it be information, a transaction, whatever it is, then I leave and don’t pursue anything further with that person.

    If you’re at a point in your life where you feel that everyone is steam rolling over you, it’s because you’re continuing dialogue and rapport with those individuals.

    Associate with people who love and respect you, and with people you love and respect.

    The world is too large and too diverse to not chose who you want in your life.

  81. I disagree with this approach. The only way to deal with a passive aggressive is to be more ruthless than them. Call them out on it but in a mean way. If it’s a man, undermine his manhood, “your passive aggressive comments are so female dude.” This is not to offend women, but calling him basically a woman will make him feel stupid. If it’s a woman doing the joke, tell her she is petty. “Man those backhanded jokes really make you seem like a petty bitch.”

    The main thing these people thrive off of is that they know you will never say anything. So instead, come back and chop them in half verbally. Be prepared with about 5 or 6 comebacks because a passive aggressive will always try to comeback with something like, “Gee didn’t know somebody was so sensitive.” You have to be able to comeback with something like, “Yeah I guess I have lost my sense of humor when it comes to assholes.”

    • Bro I totally Agree with you…ignoring is not the best solution to tackle these kind of people..they will bully again and again..

      • I agree with these guys…and like the author said, you have to make it not fun for them to try to mess with you. So go a few notches past ignoring. Hit them back harder (verbally only) than they did you. I also don’t agree with the “talking it out, explaining it hurts your feelings thing”. Lots of people would think you’re nutty for talking like that. Don’t get me wrong, in an ideal world this would be the perfect thing to do. But in real life a bully will take that little speech and run with it. Who knows how they would react, but it probably wouldn’t be good and it’s doubtful they’d even listen past the first few words. Instead, when you get them in private, let your anger out on them. Let them know you don’t want to hear any of their smartass remarks any more. Most of those guys crumble at the first sign of pushback.

  82. To be respected like a king/queen you have to behave like one, people treat you the way you portray yourself in their eyes, if someone makes fun of you, you should immediately put them in their place and tell them: “hey, who do you think you are to speak to me in that tone?!?” Or the golden bestie is silence is the best answer to a fool. You should study your opponents weaknesses and faults and when you are ever under attack use it as a defense mechanism to defeat that opponent.

  83. Oh? I tell my wife my feelings and she tells me I (meaning me) don’t have those feelings. I also asked her on numerous occasions to stop mocking me and it doesn’t stop.

  84. Hi. Thanks for this great post. It was really interesting to read and I’m definitely gonna try this. People always seem to ignore what I say, even my family members.. I hope that this could solve the problem.

  85. People always make fun of me uses mean words comment about my figure eyes etc..I never reply them back..but feels hurt..I don’t get support from anyone.my ex bf too used to make fun of me many times…is it bad to be innocent quite in this world

    • Basically that’s my problem it never works for people around too that would take it just try these steps like I would buy try anything to resolve the matter

    • True, its really hard when lots of people poke fun @ u then if I stop Dng what I am Dng they poss sat sumthing about this as well, like we had a morning tea shout & I didn’t eat my bun & everyone said dont u like it just because I was on my phone, why do they have to comment or they say your phone well used just because I on it, they dont seem to pick on anyone else,

  86. I used to be able to take it, but after many many years it’s finally got to me,
    So I’ve said I don’t like been joked at, he can’t change, but I can’t except the constant have joke on me, it said I lost my sense of humour, which is not true.
    How to I handle this? Maybe i have changed, but only in the sense that I like to try stick up for myself. Any tips? And this is not a work issue it’s in my home.

    • Yes, that’s true. I was ridiculed by this co worker of mine , she is claiming that she is going to get the job next school year as a Psychologist. Since she is going to graduate in two months. I can’t believe how she could do the job as a psychologist , when she doesn’t act like she is a professional, and apply what she ‘s been learning as a Psychology major. She called my name as if she wants to comment to what I have said during the informal meeting , smirked at me twice for telling the truth . The second time she did that to me at the same day, because she couldn’t get over it. I said , ” we have different principles , I have to protect myself , I have to have peace for telling the truth . And I trust this person because she is the one who could help by solving the problem, and the truth could set me free. And I am not afraid of what is going to happen , if I will be sued or not. I emphasized that “we have different principles”. For all I know , she has no work ethics , always on the phone facebooking ,internet while at work etc… and to tell me that she will be a good school Psychologist? Knowing her credibility… I will not be bogged down by her. At first yes, I got affected by it, because I seldom get this from people, but she took advantage of me being nice ,that I could take things and not be serious about it. I think it’s because she was not able to borrow money from me the second time.

  87. Thanks ! this sounds like something I could try. I have been trying to find ways to deal with this highly unpredictable co-worker . Hopefully one of these techniques would come in handy!

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