146 thoughts on “When It’s Fun to be Awkward And When It’s Not”

  1. Being free without anxiety- being moody- good social skills – the best me- and having actual people who are fun to be together with (friends)

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  2. My opinion about awesome social life is if one not at all scared on facing any kind of new people and if one able to achieve his career using proper like minded people then that one is having an awesome social social life 😀.

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  3. I think that being happy and having the right friends is my definition of an awesome social life. Being happy with who you are and what you are and being confident, for me is one of the most important parts of an awesome social life. To be honest, I am afraid of being awkward, but I think after the Awkward to Awesome course, I think I may be able to change that.

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    • I share the same opinion and think being awesome is when I’ll be able to feel confident being around all sorts of people and being able to feel relaxed and express my opinions freely.

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  4. I agree with everything!
    I think that it’s really great because before I did the test to this emails. I was simply lost, I had no idea what to do or how to do it right.
    Personally I have had it hard to make friends because, i didn’t know what to say or what I can say. It was all a mess anyway. I think having close friends to be comfortable around is much better than having alot of unknown once.
    It sounds really interesting because I already love this so much!
    Thanks David^^

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  5. An awesome social life for me is being surrounded with people who can bring yourself out without even trying or noticing. It just that natural instant familiarity and connection that proves to you who you are. (If that makes sense…)

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  6. To have an awesome social life means the pleasure you enjoy when sharing your ideas about certain topics with the people you interact with

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  7. Hy Morin… Thank you for this wonderful opportunity and all your emails. Well I think my own definition of an awesome social life is being around people that always motivate you and you feel comfortable around doing things that you extra ordinarily won’t do but once you do them you feel this extra ordinary joy and comfort.

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  8. Hi Morin,
    Thanks for your words of wisdom about communicating more effectively. They’ve really helped me and I’ve learnt a lot. For me a great social life is embracing me for who I’m and also embracing others for who they are, with or without our flaws, such as, social awkwardness etc.

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  9. Thanks for these awesome emails theyre really helpful. I would say it would be awesome to have a sense of humor and be able to get people to laugh. This would get people to want to listen to you talk since you are funny.

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  10. According to me an awesome social life would look like – me able to start conversation with the person i wanna talk to and not making dumb out of myself and investing more time to my like minded friends , with whom you can act like anything.

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  11. To be with the people I or you love, is never something to be taken for granted. The feeling of comfort is indescribable. Well, at least for me who reaallly hate being in a crowded place with acquaintances and work place.

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  12. Thanks for the emails!! They’re very useful and teach a lot about communication.

    For me, an awesome social life is when you can go out with friends a few times a month to places that you all want to go to. Or you take turns deciding where to go.

    When you can share your stories about various topics and listen sometimes as well as talk!

    I think an awesome social life is created when people may be busy but can always make time in the future for you. And then you can do the same for them too!

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  13. Mr. David I must say I’m really enjoying your articles. You r providing the kind of stuff which is really close to my life. Your articles not only tells about basic human social problems but also gives solutions on how to tackle them effectively. I used to be a very nervous type of personality who always complains about insufficient enjoying life. I was abused mentally and physically in my childhood by my parents and classmates due to which I have developed an anti social type of personality. I sed to be shy, nervous, angry at different situations without any valid reason bcz I lacked emotional maturity. But time passes and I have grown more mature by age. Now I don’t care about anything happening in the world. What i care is just how to make your each day better than previous ones. Now I really enjoying doing small stuffs. I have grown passion for traveling and doing different new things. My goal is to just explore my life and the world more and more. I have developed a mindset of peace and satisfaction. I hope we will colloborate in near future. Nice to meet u Mr. David

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  14. Awkward to awesome sounds like a great way to improve my relationships with friends, family and significant others! I would love to also learn how to improve emotional intelligence to catch subtle body language cues and anticipate people’s emmotional needs, especially if talking about a tough or controversial subject. I have trouble approaching these subjects in a way that does not start conflict or undue mental strain with the person I am speaking to.

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  15. For me having an awesome life would be to have friends (I don’t mind if they’re few, if they are good) and hang around with them without having to worry about whether I would like them or not, just be with them, chilling.

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  16. This is fantastic! I’m learning so much. My ability to talk to people is growing! Thank you very much David for sharing your knowledge! God bless you!

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  17. According to me an awesome social life is which you have many good friends to hang out with, who respects you, confident speaking in public etc

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  18. Well If you talk about social life, it’s simply mean that you are presenting your things, your life your daily basis routine to all the people around you.. but if you ask for Awesome Social Life, for me that means you are free to live your life the way you want to, you don’t need to think before speaking anything socially, or before presenting anything to around the social people.. you don’t need to make yourself comfortable as per other expectation.. it’s only you who is comfortable and this is the important thing that you only have to think about your comfort, your expectations.. not others.. This is Awesome Social Life for me..

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  19. Hello 🙂
    When I hear “awesome social life” the first thing that comes to my mind is being free and able to say whatever comes to my mind without thinking that I could say something wrong.
    I overthink what I’m about to say too long that sometimes it makes me look awkward.
    I’ve been applying some of the tips you provided in your emails -and by the way they are AWESOME- and I’ve been noticing positive changes in my social life 🙂

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    • You summed all what I was thinking to write. It is amazing how can we relate to each other experiences. I do overthink I am very awkward and my awkwardness held me back from living free. I also think those emails are the best so far.

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  20. Hi
    An awesome social life to me is when I can be just me…Not being expected to have an opinion or to contribute to a conversation. Sometimes I really just want to listen and observe, other times I like to chat mostly one on one.
    Regards
    Gerda
    Thanks for the good content!

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  21. I think you have to feel awesome with yourself first. And get over the feeling of being judged and being afraid of being embarrassed. I think that’s my biggest obstacle.

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  22. When we can say what we want to say, and don’t regret saying what we did, then it makes that interaction pleasant and meaningful.

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  23. My definition of a good social life would be someone who is confident in what they say to people and strangers. They also have a somewhat deep if not totally deep connection with people when the talk to each other.

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  24. I find I be my self no matter who I talk to.
    I can’t always get on with some.
    We find that we can’t understand each other and I just accept it.
    I learnt to start over again.

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  25. First you have to feel awesome with yourself first before you can be socially awesome, you have to look within yourself and accept who you are, the good and the bad and then tell yourself you are awesome and wonderfully made. We are all awesome in our ways even if we don’t all know it we are, that is why it is important to surround yourself with positive friends who also tap in into your current of your awesomeness, this makes you feel even more awesome and equally makes they people around you feel awesome too. I’ve suffered from social anxiety, low self esteem all my life, I’m slowly learning how to be grateful and appreciate the little things and it’s done wonders to my life, so don’t beat your self up you are a work in progress!
    In conclusion being socially awesome starts with you, there is no limit to how awesome you can be and equally no limit to how awesome you can be make people around you feel by just simply being awesome yourself just they way you are !

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  26. My definition of awesome social life is quite similar to your definition. Because I believe that you need to have someone who you can tell all your problems to and share good memories. Further I need to inform you that all your emails are really helpful, also you are doing a great help for everyone. I searched everywhere for a real advice about social anxiety but everything required to pay. I am really grateful to you. May God bless you.

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  27. Hi David. I’m struggling with making and keeping friends. I’m nice to everyone but I don’t feel like I have any true, always there, got your back friends and it makes me upset. I don’t like being lonely. People are nice to me but I want someone I can always turn to. How do I make my good acquaintances want to become my friends? How do I keep my guy friends after they don’t have a crush on me anymore? How do I make sure that my friends are my friends? Thanks

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  28. To me, an awesome life is when I’m able to accept who I truly am, doesn’t have to be fearful or anxious that I might mess up the conversation and whatsoever. Besides, being able to enjoy myself in every moment of time makes me feel that my life is awesome

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  29. Dear David, I really love and appreciate your approach to overcoming social anxiety. They are realistic and easy to relate with. Well, my definition of an awesome social life is being able to express myself without feeling judged or paranoid.

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  30. An awesome social life for me would be to have a special woman to love and be loved by, to have kids that look up to me and to have close friends I can talk to about anything. I would also like to be able to start conversations with strangers easily and to be known as a warm and friendly person.

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  31. Hey thanks for your advice, it’s honestly the most accurate I’ve ever heard but how do you shift ideas and tips into practice. I read all of your tips and tricks and it fills me with so much confidence but as soon as I get into a social situation it’s all gone. I can remember what I have to do and say but the conversation still doesn’t flow. How to I make the switch from theory to practice so I can actually connect with people?

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  32. Awesome to me is when you can be totally yourself and have your friends enjoy you for you and there’s no over thinking did I say something wrong? Could I have said more or less? None of that, just being and having fun with who you are with.

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  33. I don’t know how to connect on a deeper level. Sometimes, I feel like i click with a person but don’t know how to connect in a way to deepen the friendship. I try establishing things we have in common but it feels like surface level stuff. I have also tried asking open and random questions to no avail. I am a person that gets bored easily so this may be one of the reasons. I’m also the person reaching out to the other more often, so feels like the other person isn’t interested. All my friendships tend to fade away within a few months. I’m sick of it, what should I do? I’m not looking for generic advice like, ask open questions, do an activity together etc. I’ve done all that with no results. I want advice that will help me

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    • Same with me I hate small talks I think they are meaningless. I can not be engaged in stupid convesations people make to pass time. I always wander why my friends loooovvve to gather and have group converstions. What is so great about throwing jokes and short stories. I tried I tried to share but it is so awkward I can not say the right thing in the right time. It does not come natural to me. We are observer. We are not engager. We observe other people talks. That what we do. We are great in one one chat but in a deeper level. We go deep. We hate superficial noises. But that makes us less desirable when the other person just want to chill. I am just tired of being less fun. We are not fun maybe we need to learn to have fun. I think also we are truthful. We do not say something that we do not mean. I wish we could play and joke around act and do fun staff. I am sorry for the long response. I hope it makes sense to you.

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  34. For me awesome social life would be one where I could talk to anyone without thinking twice, where I’d be more confident and less self conscious, where I’ll also give my suggestions in important matters apart from taking orders. I don’t talk to people because it’s my thinking that people wouldn’t want to talk to me or I’d be disturbing them, this is one more thing which holds me back from having an awesome life. My social life would be awesome when I’ll be able to be myself in the crowd without any fear of judgement.

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  35. Having great conversations with others without the pressure to feel they must approve of you first is what I consider a awesome social life. Presenting yourself as you and enjoying each other’s company makes the whole connection feel more real and close. I just have a hard time figuring out if I’m too awkward to the point it makes the other no longer wanting to talk with me. I guess have a hard time just letting things slide.

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  36. My college life started a month ago and forget about friends I have not found a single person who regularly talks to me everybody has made their groups they go out for outings and stuff but I hardly get that kind of an opportunity. I have realized that the time I enter into college I become a different person I mean I think I get a bit needy for attention I tend to over think I have hardly any topics to talk about I mean IDK what happens you know my school life was a bit dull so I had a lot of expectations from my college and in the past one month I have realized that things in my are getting worse day by day I am not able to handle this Loneliness and anxiety sometimes I miss important lectures just because I have to sleep till late and then I expect from others who I hardly talk to, to help me with the lessons I have missed and I tend to get a bit overboard with that stuff I literally thing I have forgot how to make friends can u give me so e advice on how I can make my college life better both in terms of personal and professional

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  37. Ackward is presenting yourself as the opposite of who you really are. In social settings, I become this enthusiastic extrovert seemingly saying all the right things at the right time. But in all honesty, it takes a tremendous amount of energy. Afterwards I avoid the people I interacted with for fear of them discovering my true personality. Awesome is confidently conversating about anything. Finding out about a person and then REMEMBERING what they said, because you were listening to THEM not your own nervous self talk.

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    • Awkward is feeling that you are missing out on thriving . Your own awkwardness is restricting you from living as passionately and fully as you can – be that “failing” to make more connections with people or failing to present yourself as an assertive great person .

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  38. Awkward to me in socializing, is feeling you have to say the right thing all the time & not be yourself by not being perfect on what to say like why? Just be liked or notice. When talking with people. Saying this is awkward. Reminiscing in your head all the time.I did & or do. Thinking it to at times its weird. It happens
    Even to me. Its ok.

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  39. Hi David,
    For me an awesome social life actually is approving yourself without checking for others approval.When you do that and are happy for who you are,then nobody can turn down your happiness.And happiness is what an social life is all about.You can do what you want to do.
    (I think so,Because that’s what I lack!)

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  40. My fortieth highschool reunion is coming up. I was traumatized in childhood and was awkward during my school years to say the least. I’ve done lots of work to heal and plan on going to the reunion. I’m reading one of the books you suggested, The Fine Art of Small Talk. (what was available at my local library) And I’m hoping to be able to practice at the reunion.

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  41. An awesome social life is having a circle of friends that appreciate you as much as you appreciate them and you are not always the one reaching out in a one-sided friendship. You have people you can call on and hang out with, and those you can really share your heart with. You also can be a support to them as well because they are real people who don’t try to make you think their life is perfect.

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  42. My definition has changed as I’ve aged but unfortunately it has also changed because I’ve given up to a certain extent on the hope of a thriving, fun and busy social life. I do think, however, that my definition now is more authentic and sincere. I would just like to have a few close friends to talk with, laugh with, go out to dinner with and just do life with. Honestly, I’m looking for community. It has been so difficult to find. I try to be sincere and authentic and I’m looking for those qualities in a friend. It seems all I’m meeting are people who keep things very light and aren’t interested in really getting to know me or delving into a new friendship. It’s as if their dance cards are all full. But surely there are still a few people who would like one more friendship. Regardless, my pursuit of friendship is growing old and frankly I’m so damn exhausted. I get that I’m a little introverted but I’m not a hermit.

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  43. An awesome social life for me would be to stop being nervous, tensing up in social situations, and just be able to talk to anyone I want. Your emails have been helping me a lot! Thank you!

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  44. Hi David,
    My definition of awesome social life is to be able to express my opinion and confidently interact with other people especially to the people you recently know.

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  45. Hi David

    An awesome social life for me means being able to go anywhere by myself and not feel awkward starting a conversation with someone because I am lost for words. I would love to feel confident and hold a conversation without my nervous taking over and say something that ends in dead silence. Awkward. Can’t wait for your course. I’m so excited to have found you. I hope to break out of my shell and finally enjoy my time with people instead of trying to avoid them.

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  46. I think my deffinition of Awsome would have to be the ability feel confident and comfortable talking to people of high importance in my life without the fear of being judged and feeling I have said something wrong.

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  47. My definition of an awesome social life probably means having close friends to hang out with. Maybe I feel this way because I never had many friends. I feel that an awesome social life would be possible when I am able to talk with my friends (not necessarily close) without getting nervous.

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  48. My definition of an awesome social life is when you have friends to travel around the world with , friends with similar values as yours. ?

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  49. Hi David and all
    I think an awesome social life comes first by social interaction with good and bad people.Jealousy comes out and about because people can be too curious sometimes but the more social interaction meens the more one can increase his/her self of steem this is down by recieving hard personal self-knowledge and meeting such people of this type also breaks the jealousy cracks
    Sincerely Moe

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  50. I would like to achieve all of this you said but dont know how.

    It is awesome in the way that I can be who I want to be with people I want to be with. I think it’s awesome to have a close family of friends who I can always reach out to and who I can trust will be there for me. At least in my head, when I hear the “Awesome” in “Awkward to Awesome,” I’m thinking about how awesome the small things in a good social life can be:

    > Having a late night walk with a close friend talking about life.

    > Enjoying a conversation with a stranger and making a real connection.

    > Feeling confident that you always know what to say next.

    > Conveying who you are and making people interested in you.

    > Always having close friends you can reach out to and hang out with.

    > Feeling confident talking to the one you’re attracted to.

    > Being free to do what you truly want without being held back: Traveling, joining a new course, volunteering, or starting your dream project.

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  51. Awesome social life means to me having a amazing life of happiness relationship with others.a feeling that every carries when we emerged together.

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  52. This looks interesting David!
    For me awesome is when ppl around me feel awesome in my presence! And carry that feeling for long and crave for more “me” . Is it possible?
    Would wait for ur reply!
    Best,
    Namrata

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  53. I was an extrovert when I was young but when I grew older, it became less until I becane more aware of other and overthinking all the tine about what they think. This hindered me from being who I am and doing what I do. With this in mind, I agree to what you have said, being awesome is being who you are in any situation.

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  54. Before that Thankyou David for these email, i was so relate and am so excited to hear a lot from you about this subject because you know David i am also been struggling with this aspect of my life. I am really fond of socializing and talking to people but I still felt this awkward feeling inside of me.. coz sometimes I felt that I am not very good in speaking and kinda noticed that sometimes whenever I spoke, not all are interested in hearing me. I need ur help! Thanks a lot! Have a good day!

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  55. An awesome social life is when you connect with people confidently, help them amd they trust you as well as they like to talk with you, thats the awesome social life according to me??.

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  56. I suffered from social anxiety for many years, mine depends on the person I talk to, the more I care about the person, the worse my anxiety is, I cannot make my face relaxed and it just keep tight and giving awkward expressions, and I cannot focus on what they say, sometimes the people I talked to got the same awkward expressions, then I know that they feel uncomfortable, and I start to avoid the conversation with them next time even I really want to talk to them. Also I avoid to join the social places with the one I’m attracted to, if there are many people, and when I talked to other person instead the one I’m attracted to, I cannot stop my anxiety when this person is there or watch at me, that will make me so uncomfortable. It is even worse than I directly talk to them, I totally understand that we don’t need to be look down upon ourselves and I don’t think I am, but I just want to feel relaxed when I talk to someone I care about.
    Even I keep trying to go to the social places to get a practice, it is still very hard for me to let my anxiety go. Hope to have more advice that makes it work.

    Best regards,
    Jessica

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  57. to me awesome would mean being able to chat more freely with different people without over thinking what to say next or holding my self from talking what i want to say because am afraid of saying the wrong thing. being able not think about what other people are thinking or saying about me during a conversation- being able not to think about being judged.to be social awesome i think i would be able to stop being self conscious during a conversation and be able to flow with chat without feeling as if i am intruding or talking too much.

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  58. being respectful and trustful, to act naturally but with respect and be on my word. try not to judge people as much as I can.
    best regards.

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  59. To me being socially awesome is having conversation and not having to think that if i had said this, it would have been better.
    And also being able to connect to who you want to, opposite sex and same.
    And also not having to think before hand what to say, how to react to the response and having not to dread the so much fearful awkward silence.

    Thanks David, Amanda and Viktor ( + all the people in the back stage ). Keep up the good work

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  60. In all honesty, I came to this sight looking for information on social interaction– just like many others. So I wasn’t surprised when I got exactly that! These one on one-esk emails give off a casual, comforting vibe that really helps when trying to learn something new, especially something like social adequate.

    Unfortunately for me, these useful emails don’t shed any light on what I’m looking for. Don’t get me wrong; this advice is amazing, and I know so many people who could use just a piece of this. But I don’t need this advice.

    I don’t mean to sound harsh or narcissistic– but I’m already extroverted and I have no problem making friends. I’ve met so many nice people; we just don’t connect, you know? And it’s really annoying when these people don’t understand why I don’t make an effort to get to know them better.

    Actually, I came here because I was feeling guilty and anxious. I don’t want to loose the friends I have and I want to deepen our bonds, but I don’t want to be cold and closed-off to everyone else. I might be over-thinking it, but I feel like I’m trying too hard and at the same time, not trying hard enough. Does that make sense? Maybe I don’t ask enough questions, or maybe my confidence is overwhelming, but I’m sure someday I’ll figure it all out!

    Some of the stuff in these emails have been very insightful, but it’s just not what I’m looking for. And I really appreciate the effort that was put into this. I’m sure– no– I’m certain there are many more people out there who would benefit from this. In fact, so many of my close friends are said people. I only wish I could help them with this advice without sounding like a jerk or something. That’s a nice thought.

    With that in mind, I’d like to thank the people who put in the time and the research for this project. I wish I could say it helped me greatly, but I don’t think writing a heartfelt comment and then lying about it is very appropriate. It did however help me self reflect and become a little more spacially aware.

    So, thank you! And may your advice keep helping others!

    Sincerely,
    Emma Nageraboshi

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  61. Hey I have been getting you emails for a while now and I don’t really know how to explain a awesome social life. I mean i’ve been in multiple social conversations where I would say wow this is a really good conversation, and other times I would say something and think to myself “Hayleigh your so stupid why would you say that.” I have noticed over time that I don’t always have to say something I can just listen.

    I would like to tell you something though……
    I have a really awkward boyfriend and I am awkward as it is, but I want him to feel comfortable around me. He never knows what to say but I can usually start up a conversation. The question is when is he going to start his own conversations???

    Sincerely,
    Hayleigh

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  62. An awesome social life is feeling you provide value for those you interact with, _and_ that you feel they value you back.

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  63. I think an awesome social life is being confident in who you are as a person with the people you want to be with

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  64. A great social life/friendship: openly and equally showing care for one another. Too many times I experience even with my closest friends that we can’t openly show how we care about each other’s feelings and well being…maybe it’s a teenage thing? A rejection thing? Eitherway, a great social life for me would be the freedom to be myself among all. A few groups of close friends and many casual friends from all around the world. Openly loving! Accepting! Diverse!

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  65. My conversation always, invariably,ends up with me being put in the”friend”category with women. Why is that? And how do I put an end to this? I tend to think that it’s a defensive move by the ladies, but I’m getting very tired of it and would like to know what to do to stop it from happening!

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  66. I’ve made friends! Woot. But how to you invite them over and stuff without it seeming like some weird date or just anything that won’t make the experience as awkward :I

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  67. A great Social Life: One that I have many casual friends with a few close friends that share common values, interests and history. Where we both can share or talk about a common activity regularity, and where we both respect and accept each other for who we are.

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  68. Hey David,
    I love that you are starting another program. My idea of a fun time is going camping and hiking with friends and any big group outing. I think that by taking your course, I will be able to learn how to connect to people and LEAVE A MARK.

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  69. An awesome social life for me where I am popular and friendly with everyone by BEING MYSELF. I would love it when people approach me with their problems(don’t get me wrong,i am not saying that they should have problems). But i always love to be a shoulder for them to cry on and i want them to understand my worth. I want to have daily have the feeling of being needed upto at extent.This would make my day and make my life awesome.Last but not the least, i would love to be comfortable talking with anyone and getting to know all my friends personally and i want them to trust me. I love it when socially all relationships are built on trust.
    I also want to independent but i have this inner feeling that i want other people to depend on me…. Well that concludes my imaginary social status that i keep dreaming to have but unfortunately can’t achieve it anytime soon.

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  70. I think being social is a good thing in life because being comfortable talking to people that you know. But I always keep myself in a shell all the time when I’m around people. I just need to work on expressing myself.

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  71. I agree to every single thing you mentioned. And I love reading your articles. Very sensible, but my problem is conversing with my husband mostly. I make friends with anyone but very hard to do it with him. Is it because he is avoiding me. He is very good with everyone else.

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  72. Classy akward …having monemnts of awkwardness turned into a thing that all people rise to do or people repeat after you did them..

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  73. I think awesome social life describes a life that allows one to fully utilize the available opportunities to do whatever they feel, like many friends, going places and they enjoy doing these activities.

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  74. Hi David,

    For me “Awesome” means, to talk to strangers in gatherings and be comfortable with them such that they like me and start respecting each other.

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  75. I have a problem, I get to be very social at times but then when I try to remember what I did to achieve that but it’s just all gone and I go back to getting everything you explain social anxiety and awkwardness to be, I feel humiliated for not been able to do the most basic thing in human interaction, I do thank you for all your content, it’s really been helping me, I just wish I didn’t forget how to keep it up.

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    • Same here. On some days i can talk to people perfectly fine, and then i think i’ve finally cracked the code, only to be completely socially incapable the next day!

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  76. What I can really say about awesome social life is that I feel great when talking or when I’m around my close friends. I’m not always afraid of making mistakes around them, I don’t feel cautious. I’m always full if energy.
    But on the other hand, those I’m not close to or meeting for the first time I’m always afraid of making mistake, I isolate myself. If I happen to say something and they all look at me whether it is good or bad, I feel awkward but have improved a little bit though

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  77. An awesome social life for me is to be able to express myself without feeling like I am always judged and hated by others. To me, I would like to go out with more friends and parties I am invited to. With some friends outside of school, I like doing physical activities, traveling, and drawing (to me that is much of an improvement). I want to be confident in my own skin and not be noticed and stereotyped because of my race. As well as making some of my dreams come true. Personally, I like having deep conversations with close friends because small talk really scares me and I tend to live in my own mind. This also means I that I stick with two or three friends because they get me and I am afraid if I am open to others they might not be real or will not be the same as some of my friends now and that they will get a wrong perception of me.

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  78. Well, for me an awesome social life is when I have the confidence to get out to the real world and socialize with people instead of being stuck here in my own little world. It also means that I am enjoying my life with my closest friend without feeling afraid to talk with them because of I’m afraid of being awkward.

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  79. Hi David,

    Thanks for your help and assistance. I’ve really found it useful.
    To me, an awesome social life is being able to not just survive but thrive in any social situation and not get totally overwhelmed by anxiety.
    I have a very active social life and like to be able to listen and respond intently to anyone in the room, even people whom I may have nothing much in common with, but this isn’t always easy once anxiety and pressure to be amusing gets in the wa but I’m working on this.
    I just need to tell myself that I don’t always have to make an impression because that is too much pressure and what makes me anxious. To be able to feel totally at ease in any social setting would be my idea of an awesome social life.

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  80. For me personally, awesome social life is when you participate, enjoy and socialize in all sort of different social activities: parties, theater, social groups, travelling, adventure, fine dining etc. instead of focusing on only one, few or none….basically, if you are put in any situation, you will be able to socialize, connect, be knowledgable and enjoy

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  81. My idea of an awesome social life would be to first have enough trust in humanity that I could feel comfortable around people socially and not just on a professional level. To find and trust true friendship would lead to a great social life…at least I believe it would for me.

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  82. Hi Dave,am really grateful for all you have been sharing. I am already seeing changes. I was able to start and sustain an interesting conversation with a total stranger.Now I can say stuff to keep a conversation going instead of awkward silence.My idea of an awesome social life is being able to connect with anyone with ease.I should be able to speak up and express my views in a conversation with others instead of being awkwardly quiet especially around talkative people.Being socially awesome means I will be able to enjoy the company of others and that others would value my presence …I find it easy to talk to people at my level but when aroundthose I admire and deem better than me I fail to sustain a meaningful conversation.. how can I improve?

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  83. Hi Dave,am really grateful for all you have been sharing. I am already seeing changes. I was able to start and sustain an interesting conversation with a total stranger.Now I can say stuff to keep a conversation going instead of awkward silence.My idea of an awesome social life is being able to connect with anyone with ease.I should be able to speak up and express my views in a conversation with others instead of being awkwardly quiet especially around talkative people.Being socially awesome means I will be able to enjoy the company of others and that others would value my presence …I find it easy to talk to people at my level but when aroundthose I admire and deem better than me I fail to sustain a meaningful conversation.. how can I improve?

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  84. This is a really late reply. I’ve been dealing with school stuff and exams so haven’t had any time.
    My idea of awesome is basically being able to the things I love with the people I love. Like for instance whenever I have a weird dream (and I that’s almost always) once I wake up, the first people I tell are my 3 closest friends and my boyfriend. They always so my dreams are like stories which I never get to finish. So they try to finish it on their own. It’s a weird activity that no one apart from us understand, but I always think it’s awesome.
    Or like how during the last week before the holidays I would go on a walk with my best friend. At first I thought she hated it and I was too shy to tell her how much I enjoyed it. It was later that I realized she always looked forward to it. I’ll never forget how happy I felt, I was smiling like an idiot. It was the best most awkward moment I’ve had with her
    Basically if I have the courage to share the things I love WITH the people I love, then that’s awesome to me

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  85. Awesome social life acc to my pov is..
    You have good interaction with everyone ..you exchange smiles whenever you meet..greet each other with respect..
    Actually shy ppl can’t HV dat coz they often think about awakardness

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  86. I think my definition of an “awesome” social life is being able to speak up, and say what I want even if I think people would think it’s weird or awkward.

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  87. Hi Dave!
    I’m really excited to begin this journey with you. Finally, at the age of 17, I understood what a friend could bring in my life and what I could bring to others.
    I think my ideal of awesome in a social context is me driving a passionate discussion with two people about what we value the most and what we plan to do to achieve that. It’s my favorite kind of conversation.

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  88. Hi Dave thank Your emails I’ve found them very interesting so far.

    I suffer from loneliness living alone and I’m a bit shy as well. I lack confidence and have low self esteem.i find it hard at times to start a conversation and if I’m out for hours in company a lot of the time I’m quiet. If the conversation stops I get that awkward silence.

    I would love to be able to talk more and start a conversation.

    I find messaging really easy, but I’d love to speak to people face to face without the awkwardness silent bit.

    I feel as though my past marriage and not socialising much at the time has affected me.

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  89. A great social life is when you can totally be yourself.
    Totally be yourself and the people you are with like or love
    you just as you are. And not being two faced or appear to be
    something you’re not. And also, not be a fake person and be
    a genuine person.

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  90. I think what I really want in life is to have more close friends and have the skill to be able to easily make new friends. There is one guy I’ve been wanting to talk to for a while and I could get to know him better. I really want to become friends with him, but I’m just to scared to go up to him and say hi. I don’t really know what I’d say, and I don’t want to scare him off either. I just want to become his friend, but I’ve never been able to make any friends on my own. They’ve all just come up to me and asked to be friends.

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    • Hi Emma. I don’t claim to fully understand why you feel that way, but do you think this might be because of either fear of being judged/rejected, or your ego of not approaching someone first (for fear of being humiliated again)? In my experience, even though I don’t think I’m a very proud or arrogant person, but I do think the ego factor was at work when I’ve felt similar issues. If you think the reason is something similar to these two, I think u should try what Buddha preached: let go of yourself comletely. Believe that if you aren’t “rejected” or “humiliated” once a while, then you haven’t really achieved anything. You must let yourself be “humiliated” in this way if you really want something meaningful to happen.

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  91. I recently had a co-worker of mine working at Subway with me. He was only 16 but he had the most amazing social life I had ever seen. He was very easy to talk to, had a pretty girlfriend he much cared about, and plenty of friends who would come and eat at the Subway we worked at. I worked with this guy five days a week but he had friends of his come in and eat there an average of 2 to 3 days a week. This told me this guy must have been very good with social skills to have that many friends coming into Subway to see him on a regular basis. This got me thinking, how can I become that good at socializing to where I will have friends and a girlfriend like this guy? For me, I am comfortable meeting people and making plans to hang out with people. However, I am not good at hanging out with people on a daily basis for long periods of time. This is one thing I want to change so I can have more deep, close friendships where friends will come and visit me because they want to. This is something I would be interested in you talking about in future videos.

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    • @ Anonymous! Hey, I think I understand a bit of you getting fed up of seeing your friends on a daily basis and for long periods of time. It’s totally okay if you are that way, and you should look for friends who would understand that about you. You can still try to change that gradually if you really want to, but know that its a normal thing to be that way oftentimes. If you really find friends who’d understand that u don’t wanna be with them practically ALL THE TIME, I think they’ll be best of friends you can ever get.

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  92. For me an awesome social life is when i can be myself and free to share all of my thoughts even though some of them are awkward and i hate it because i’m only shy at first ,the moment i get comfortable with someone they immediately like to spend time around me because im funny smart and easy going .

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  93. It’s exactly as you said it. An awesome social life for me is not partying with the rich and famous every weekend and always in exotic locations with exotic humans. For me it is being able to connect deeply with people who I have an interest for no matter how short of a time we spend together.

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  94. What next? You’ll be sending more emails?
    I really liked the content..any other content like these which can help me with my problems with talking to strangers?

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  95. An awesome social life, for me, is simply having some friends to have fun with every now and then. Friends who can be consulted if necessary. It’s fun to go to never-before-seen places with others, including our families.

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  96. I agree. I think that an awesome social life is being confident around people and knowing that you will never run out of things to say. I too believe that close friends and family are the best blessing and give true meaning to life. Like you say, a great social life is being able to be your true self around anyone.

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  97. My awesome social life would be to invite people to do things and be invited to do things, yet have enough time for myself alone to recharge. Kris

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  98. I think an awesome social life would be having a fun time with just about anyone, because you are socially independent. Having deep conversations with people, while also having the best time ever with them would be awesome too. The main goal would be to communicate often(small talk) and having purposeful conversations with just about anyone, while having fun.

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  99. I think of awesome in this as being able to talk to people and feel equal to them to be thinking about what they are saying and be able to say what I want back instead of thinking about what they think of me and being afraid to say what I want because I don’t want them to know how I am feeling, which is afraid, afraid of their opinion of me. It holds me back everywhere I am.

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  100. I really love these confidence courses! Thank you so much – you have helped me improve a lot. One thing: How do you loosen up before and during a conversation?

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  101. I think having an awesome social life means that I am surrounded with people I admire and that I do not care if they have little flaws because that makes them even more attractive. I hope we can always learn things from each other and we make each other better person. I had a friend almost like this when I was in college, I learn from her and she tells me that I gave her courage, but I didn’t think I was fully devoted and completely comfortable in the relationship because I am most of the time too self-centered and overly sensitive. Your advices are so down-to-earth and helpful, I just started learning them and I think I already feel like improving is not that hard. Thank you

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  102. My definition of an awesome social life is having people who you can be yourself around and doing fun things together such as going to the movies, shows, events, etc. I’ve always wanted one of these, but never really knew how to start. I want to be more confident and always know what to say in every situation.

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  103. David, I love the ‘Awkward to Awesome’ title. Immediately I thought of converting ‘awkward’ social activity to ‘awesome’ social contact. The title is appropriate and ‘point on’ the issue.

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  104. When I think of a awesome social life I think about one specific thing: Who I am as a person mathers! That I do NOT feel that words and thoughts that comes from me are worhtless. And that I have a flow of sharing and geting in return, not because I need to, but because it’s just the way it is with friends and family. And I don´t have to think about how to act or how to say things, because I already feel safe in the fellowship. 🙂

    I love getting this emails by the way – they already working 😀
    I think you make so many persons life so much easier!

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  105. My awesome social life would be to have a few close friends I can share everything with, and be able to confidently talk to strangers

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  106. Awkardness is about randomness thoughts, not orgnized. also, there is an ebook called seductive story telling , and another one is storytelling techniques google it so you could get out of the fuckin awkardness.

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  107. Awesome social life = have great chill, drama free people to share interests and new experiences with like kayaking and hiking. And bonding over life stories and dreams.

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  108. My definition of an awesome social life is to be completely relaxed in every situation, with different type of people. Knowing what to say and do without feeling limited or awkward.

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    • Hearing the title alone gives me goosebumps already #Awkward to awesome… The mail’s I’ve received these past days has been helpful. My convo has really improved …keep up d good work

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  109. My definition of an awesome social life is to have lots of connections in the right places and a play hard, work hard lifestyle.

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  110. My definition of an awesome social life is having people you can rely on and have a good time with. People you can go on adventures with.

    Reply

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