Here are the most frequently asked questions about Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation. If you don’t get your question answered below, just reply to any of the emails I’ve sent you! I read all the emails personally and will come back to you as soon as I can.
The best way to find out if this program is right for you is to try it yourself. You’ll get a 60 day 100% money back guarantee. That means you get a full refund up to 60 days after you registered for the program if it turns out it wasn’t right for you.
Will this work for me?
What can I expect?
About the program
Will this work for men and women?
In a study, researchers saw some differences between men and women when it came to socializing.Aukett, R., Ritchie, J. & Mill, K. Sex Roles (1988)
They saw that:
- Women’s friendships are often more intimate
- Women spent more time discussing personal problems than men
- Men talk a bit less about feelings than women
- Men, more often than women, meet through doing an activity together
In our material, we’re going to look at conversations both between women and between men.
However, the underlying psychology is universal when it comes to making conversation. As an example, what you learned so far works the same for all human beings:
- Turning the conversation into personal mode to start bonding
- Using conversational threading when the conversation dies out
- Finding commonalities
Will this program help me with my dating?
This is a program on how to make conversation. There will be no “pick up openers” or similar techniques. However, quite a few participants started this program as single and are now in blossoming relationships.
As you become more authentic, confident and able to connect with people, you’ll become a more attractive person. Both among friends and partners. Here’s what one of our beta testers told me not too long ago:
I just walked up to the girl I like for soooo long. It was a huge step, but I had the confidence and knowledge of what to talk about. If I hadn’t had this course, I would never dare to talk to her.
Will this work in my country?
There are many differences between cultures. Generally speaking, Americans are more extroverted than people from Asia. South American cultures are often more expressive than West Europeans.
We’ve made sure to take this into account designing this program, and I think that we’ve succeeded:
I’ve personally used it making friends in the US, Thailand, China, France, Spain, UK and here in Sweden. More importantly, our 118 beta testers from all over the world report great success.
The reason is the same for why Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation works for different ages and genders:
The psychology behind why humans bond is universal.
Am I too young/old for this?
The majority of our beta testers have been between 20 and 50 years old. The youngest is 16 years old and the oldest 55. Human psychology is very much the same no matter your age. We’ve had beta testers and participants of older programs of all ages reporting great results.
Will this work for my very specific situation?
Awkward to Awesome has been tested with great results on people from all walks of life. Our beta testers are men and women aged 18-55. They are people from all over the world with all kinds of careers and lifestyles. Some of them would mainly like to be more confident in social settings. Others would like to be better at bonding with people they come across. Some of them would like to have a better career, live in a larger house, have a bigger paycheck or a better physique. Still, they’ve had great results with Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation.
These people all have one thing in common. They’re quite thoughtful and tend to overthink in social settings. If you can relate to this, I am confident that this program will work for you, no matter your specific situation.
Who’s this program for?
When we let our beta testers try our program, we saw how some mainly wanted to be more at ease in conversation. Others mainly wanted to be better at bonding. Some were already doing most things right but wanted to reach a more advanced level.
We’ve designed the program in a way that works no matter where you are in this diagram.
Earlier I talked about taking really small steps and doing what excites you, not what scares you. What’s cool is that with our method, you can take small steps in the right direction no matter your starting point.
Depending on where you are in the diagram, here are my recommendations for you:
You want to be better at connecting
You’d like to be better at connecting with people. You’re able to make new acquaintances, but those seldom turn into long-term close friends.
Module 4 of the program, “Conversations that Bond” will be especially valuable for you. Perhaps you feel like you’ve been hitting rock bottom, or you’ve made some progress already. In either case, you’ll find exercises that will help you connect more easily, without having to push your limits.
You want to be more confident
If this is you, module 1 and 2, “Conversation Confidence” and “Effortless Conversation” will be game changers for you. These module works for you who feel very nervous, sometimes even shy, when it comes to socializing. For you who’ve already made some progress, it will help you to take the next step.
Perhaps you’ve already made some progress and are much better off now than, say, a year ago. Perhaps you feel that you have a long way to go. In Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation you’ll first learn to identify where you are today. Then, you’ll be able to, at your own pace, improve from that point. We won’t push you to do things you don’t want to. Instead, you’ll do what will make you improve.
What some participants in our older programs told us about confidence:
I am a lot more confident in social situations, i feel I’m a lot less awkward and find making conversation and friends a lot more of a natural process rather than thinking it was like cracking a code. I now approach more people in an attempt to make friends or start a conversation than i previously did and for this i thank you very much!!
– Armaan Chana in London, UK
As time wore on, many of my friends began to leave me, and having very few close friends with whom to interact, i felt lonely and left out, never having the adequate skill and confidence to make new friends and build ties with others. (…) With the many techniques, methods, tips and exercises that i have followed from your program, i can honestly say that it is truly changing my life for the better, strengthening my overall confidence and other skills crucial to a more social life.
– John Claveria in Manila, the Philippines
I was free. In year 2 and during that summer I had people commenting on how outgoing and confident I was (even how much I talk). I was in my element, I was embodying it. I had lots of fun and met cool people. One of the best summers ever, and just cause of the little things, nothing grand really happened but I felt happy
– Joshua in London, UK
I have always felt nervous around my boss. Today I implemented your advice and instantly felt more self confident around him. He is now much nicer to me and I feel in five years from now my career will have progressed much further as a direct result if this.
You’ve already had some success and want to take the next step
Maybe you’re one of our advanced users, who’s already had some social success. Then, Awkward to Awesome helps you take the next step when socializing. It’s a great feeling to be able to:
- Be the center of attention and keep everyone’s attention
- Connect with people and become close friends really fast
- Be the one who people look up to and gravitate towards
These are the things most people only dream about doing.
What if I don’t have the looks/ money/ career/ lifestyle/ experience/ height/ facial bone structure needed to succeed?
I often hear how people say:
“This won’t work for me because I don’t have the right looks.”
“In my city/country, people are too self-absorbed/busy/shallow/any negative word.”
“Money/career/status is what’s needed to get accepted in this society.”
“People look down on me because I’m too short/work as a postman/have a car from 1998.”
This is called “letting yourself off the hook”, deciding that your life is a product of circumstances you can’t control. Some people take little responsibility for their life situation and can’t see how they can control it. This program is not for them.
Luckily, we can do a “reality check” and look at people who share our “misfortunes” but still have a great social life. This helps us make a powerful realization:
The way our social life turns out depends largely on the way we approach people.
Some of our beta testers are unemployed, overweight, short, balding, inexperienced, the list goes on. Still, they’ve made tremendous progress. The reason is that it all comes down to how we approach people. It’s about mastering a specific set of social principles. These are the principles we will learn in Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation.
What if I blank out in conversations today?
With Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation, you get several powerful mindsets to help with this. You’ll be practicing these mindsets when you’re with people you feel comfortable around. As these mindsets become second nature to you, you will notice how you’ll no longer blank out. You’ll be able to think more clearly in social settings.
You will also get our “universal fall back questions” that you can use in almost any conversation.
What if I don’t want to “play the social game” and be a people pleaser?
We teach you how to be yourself and get away with it, even if you, like me, have a quirky or odd personality and humor. When you master the foundations of bonding with people, that’s when you’re able to “get away” with being who you want to be. At that point, you don’t have to put on a mask to fit in anymore.
Why not just deal with this by myself?too?
You can deal with this on your own. I did. However, it took 8 years for me to get to a level I was satisfied with.
This program is a bit like pressing the fast-forward button.
There are so many obvious mistakes and so much needless pain and rejection going through this alone. Those who participate in my program have decided to learn from my mistakes instead of treading water on their own.
Even for people who are several years behind, this program gives the opportunity to make a giant leap to close the gap. Many of our participants even decide to go further. They use their motivation to excel above what most people only dream about.
Is this only for people who want to improve their conversation skills, or will it work for those with anxiousness or shyness too?
We use several powerful methods that will make you feel at ease in social settings. These methods have been proven to work both for people who feel just slightly uncomfortable at times, and for those with more severe anxiety.
What if I lose my motivation halfway through?
The most common reasons we lose our motivation is the following:
- It feels like we won’t succeed
- We don’t see enough results
- Something gets too hard
That’s why we’ve designed the program in the following way:
- It clearly shows you how you can succeed
- You’ll see the initial results quickly
- The exercises are fun and motivating, not hard
We’ve been watching our beta testers, and most of them felt motivated throughout the program.
What if I fall behind?
You can take the program at whatever pace that fits you. If you are unable to attend for a period of time, you can just start off where you left. The only one setting the pace is you. We give you the tools and the support you need to achieve the goals you set for yourself.
What if it turns out Awkward to Awesome is not right for me?
Awkward to Awesome: The Art of Making Conversation is the result of over 20 000 surveys, hundreds of deep interviews and months of beta testing. Our beta participants are between 18-55 years old and from all over the world.
That’s why we’re confident that this program is effective. It will help you get more confidence in conversations and better at bonding.
What if now is not a good time for me?
A “theme” I recognized whenever I was thinking about committing to a book or a program was a voice in my head telling me things like:
“But I should try that technique I read about last week first”
“I should get X handled first”
“I should get Y finished first”
“I need to come to terms with my mental baggage first”
“I should free up more time first”
Truth is, the time will never be perfect. If you wait for things to be perfect, life is what happens while you make up plans. You want to prioritize a great social life sooner rather than later because when you do, everything in life gets both easier and more fun.
You want to ask yourself: I’ve been walking this planet for X years, and I’m still not where I want to be. Should I continue like I’ve done before and hope to one day figure this all out on my own, or is now the time to start following a proven system to get this handled?
How long will it take for me to see results?
Everyone is different and it’s not possible to set a fixed timeline. But this is the typical journey our participants take:
- Often the first thing they see change is how their conversations run a bit more smoothly: Less awkward silence and better flow. This is mostly thanks to mindsets and small insights that are easy to use immediately. They also see a small improvement in their self-confidence. But all these improvements are quite superficial and vary from day to day.
- A few weeks later they start to be better at finding mutual interests with people they hit it off with. They now become better at keeping in touch with people they like.
- After a few months, they start becoming fluent in conversations with strangers as well as friends. Things to talk about just pop up naturally.
- Here’s also where their self-confidence really starts to increase. It’s because the anxiousness about what to say or how people will react to you doesn’t control them any longer.
- At this point, most of them are able to be who they want to be and don’t need to compromise who they are. At the same time, they attract friends and partners.
- What takes the longest time to change is self-esteem. Often it’s first when they’ve made many friends and see proof that others like them, that their self-esteem grows strong.
Just one subtle change in one of your conversations may be all it takes. It can be the difference between making a lifelong friend, getting a date or nailing that job interview. This program is packed with insights that will help you make A LOT more than one subtle change.
Or you could sit at home trying to figure it all out on your own. But I’d not want to relive those painful mistakes over and over for the years it took me to figure them out.
Making conversation is a skill and therefore something you can get really good at
This program is based on the realization that we’re not born good conversationalists. Everyone has to learn it. Some learn it through trial and error, starting at preschool. Because they started practicing early, they come off as if they are born that way. Luckily, we’ve seen over and over how our participants can reach impressive results in a very short time. It’s because you jump ahead of all those years of trial and error. Instead, you follow a proven system.
This is what a long time reader said to me about her journey and approximately how long it took:
I’ve been home schooled, so I didn’t have very much social experience and I wasn’t very good at making friends. I hardly had any friends. Almost a year ago, I started going to my church’s huge youth group. As you can imagine, from my background, I got off to a bad start. Your blog, the free parts of your program, and a book called How To Win Friends And Influence People changed all of that. Especially your guide: How to be more outgoing, has really helped me. After reading your blog and the book I mentioned earlier and applying what I had learned, friendships have blossomed at my youth group. Your concept of slowly going out of my comfort zone has really helped. I have more friends at my youth group than I thought I was capable of making. I’m still shy and all of that, but I have definitely changed. Thank you so much!
– Kaitlind in Corona, CA, USA
This is what a participant of one of our older programs said (we’ve iterated on those older programs to make this one the best there is):
Do I need to force myself to talk to strangers?
No. We don’t believe that is an effective method of improving. We’ve tried it, but our experience confirmed what other studies have shown:
Most people can’t push way out of their comfort zone day after day.
Our exercises are designed to be fun and motivating. We all have daily social interactions in life, anything from the cashier to family or friends. In these interactions, we can pay attention to our behavior and improve.
How does the program work?
This is an online program that takes 4 weeks to complete. You can access the Awkward to Awesome through your computer, your tablet or smartphone.
The program is divided into 4 modules and you get one new module every week. I explain all the concepts in clear and easy to understand videos. Then, you see real world examples from the dinner we filmed with strangers who’d never met before. You’ll get to see real world examples for every concept we go through, whenever it applies.
Together with the videos, you’ll get exercises that’ll help you turn this into actual change in your life. For each module, there is a comment area where you’ll be able to discuss the material with both us and others.
How much time will this program take?
Our beta testers spent roughly 2 hours per week of studying the material. Then, they used their everyday social interactions to think about what they’d learned. A social interaction can be anything from the cashier to family or friends. The duration of the program is 4 weeks.
Is this a live program?
This is not a live program. You take the program through our website. You’ll be taking the program together with hundreds of others and can get inspired and motivated by them. But if you want to do the program at your own pace and without the involvement of others, that works great too!
The program is only available to you who are an email subscriber. Register here for Awkward to Awesome.