The Best Way to Use Small Talk Topics
In this post, I will let you know my best small talk questions – to make you awesome at keeping a smooth conversation running.
While small talk might seem unnecessary, it has a very specific purpose. Small talk is your opportunity to find similarities with the person that you talk to. Why are similarities important? Because the more similar we feel towards another person, the better chance we will have of becoming friends. The next time you make small talk, try to look for similar interests. The questions below are great to use when looking for similarities and an important part in improving small talk skills.
Ask the Person Where He or She is From
Simply ask “Where are you from?” When someone has told you where he or she is from, you can ask more about what it was like growing up there, if the person liked it, or why he or she moved. There are often emotions connected to where a person comes from, and talking about a person’s feelings and emotions are great for making a conversation more interesting.
If an interesting event has occurred in the world or in your near surroundings, it’s a great topic to use in small talk. Keep in mind to avoid political or religious topics while you’re only making small talk with someone you just met. This is because the other person don’t know you yet and if you say things that are the opposite of his or her views, you will have a harder time making friends.
The less a person knows about you, the more the things he or she DOES know about you will affect that person’s picture of you.
While some see this as a cheesy small talk topic, it could be the savior if the feared awkward silence is about to occur. Don’t say “The weather is nice” if you do not want to sound like a cliché. Try to customize your talk about the weather to the situation; “I can’t remember having these many cloudy days in a row” or “This is almost a bit too hot for me. What temperature do you prefer?”
Asking about someone’s job is a great way to make small talk – as long as it’s done right. Talking too soon or too long about work can make you look boring. Therefore, before you feel that you are stuck on the subject – ask the person what he or she is doing on their spare time. On the upside, you will get valuable information about what kind of person you are talking to. Perhaps, the person has a job you can relate to and can both have a discussion around. Make sure to cover the topic of work but do not get stuck in it!
This is the most interesting topic of them all. Why? Because the chances are that you will find a similar field of interest. As you know, as soon as you start to talk about a subject that you are both interested in, time flies and the conversation gets amusing. Everyone has to have some kind of interest if you dig deep enough.
Watch our article on how to make conversation interesting here.
Feelings And Beliefs
This advice is seldom taught in small-talk recommendations. However, it is one of the most interesting things that you can talk about. One mistake that many people make when it comes to talking about feelings and beliefs is getting too deep too fast. While asking about the more general topics above, ask the person what he or she feels about them:
“How did it feel moving to a new city?”
“What kinds of weather do you like the most?”
“Where would you like to live if you had an unlimited amount of money?”
You can ask crazy questions if you want, as long as they are related to what you previously were talking about. They make conversations a lot more fun. Don’t forget to share your views on these topics as well.
After a while, you can ask even deeper questions. Check out our comprehensive guide on how to ask about feelings to make close friends super-fast.
While small talking, always is on the look for things that you can both relate to. You will both enjoy the conversation at first when you find a similar area of interest. When you find the interest, you will bond on a deeper level. Here are some other, more general things to talk about.
Ask the other person where he or she has been. You will get a picture of the other person by asking about this. It is possible that you have been to the same places. If you have been or want to go to any of the places the person talks about, let the other person know it.
Friends and family
Ask questions about how the person knows the others at the party or if he or she knows friends you suspect him or her to know. You can also ask about the other person’s siblings. When you have established a closer relationship, you can ask questions about the person’s family.
Don’t forget to ask questions
These are a few tips on how to create small talk. If you make a statement in the small talk, I recommend always ending it with a question. That is also a bulletproof way of ending awkward silence since the person doesn’t have to come up with something new to talk about.