Viktor Sander B.Sc.

How to tell if a girl likes you: 42 signs she has a crush on you

How do you know if a girl likes you or even has a crush on you?

My name is Viktor Sander. I’ve coached hundreds of men to have more success with women.

Here’s a list of 42 signs to help you understand how she feels about you.

1. Is she laughing at your jokes (even when they’re bad)?

This has always been a BIG GREEN SIGN of interest for me. I’ve seen it both in most of the girls I’ve dated and also in girls my friends have dated. If she got a crush on you, she will most likely think all your jokes are super funny even if they aren’t.

Read more: How to be funny (for un-funny people).

2. Is she mirroring you?

Mirroring means that her body language, posture, or even what she’s saying reflects what you said or did. So if you take a sip of your glass, if she’s mirroring that, she’ll also take a sip of her glass. Or if you cross your legs and she does the same, that’s also mirroring.

Take note that mirroring is done subconsciously when she has a very good rapport with you. But it can also be done consciously if she really wants to impress you or bond with you. It’s a great sign either way.

3. Has she added you on social media (like Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, or WhatsApp) after you met?

This one means she wants to stay in touch and is at least a little bit interested in you. It also makes it a lot easier for you to take initiative.

4. How long are her texts or messages compared to yours?

Is she always giving you short answers, or is she giving you a small novel as a reply?

If her texts are about the same length or longer than yours, that’s great. It’s especially good if they’re longer than yours.

If you’re usually giving her long replies, but not getting the same in return, it means you’re probably too eager. In that case, it’s often good to step back a bit and try to match her better. Give her some space so she wants to come back to you again.

5. Is she teasing you?

Is it mean teasing or more flirty and light-hearted?

Most forms of teasing (even mean) are usually a sign she’s interested in you. I LOVE it when a girl I like tries to tease me. It means she’s trying to create a flirty vibe between you and that she wants a reaction from you. Just don’t take it too seriously and try to have fun with her!

6. Is she doing the “lean in”?

If she’s leaning in toward you, that’s a sign she’s eager to get your attention or get her message across. And in the best case, it also means she’s eager to get closer to you.

7. Is she getting “too close” to you compared to what is normal?

If you’re in a conversation and you feel like she’s edging closer to you, or as if she’s almost uncomfortably too close to you, that’s a good sign. It could mean she’s attracted to you and wants to feel closer to you both physically and mentally.

Take note that different cultures have different “personal spaces”. So, if she’s from a different culture than you, it might just be because of that.

8. Is she’s doing the “lip bite thing”?

Biting herself lightly in the lip is a flirty and cute (or sexy) signal. If she’s biting herself in the lip while you’re talking, that’s great. She’s probably into you.

9. Is she smiling toward you?

If she’s smiling toward you from afar, that’s an invitation to approach her. Or she’s flirting with you. (I’m assuming you didn’t just forget to put your pants on when leaving home. I almost did that once, not recommended!)

If she’s smiling toward you when you’re in a conversation, that’s a sign she likes you. Especially if she has a light smile while you’re not even joking.

10. Is she doing “the lick”?

Is she licking her lips or teeth? This is similar to biting her lips, but a bit more subtle and less flirty. Still a good sign she might like you.

11. How much is she blinking?

If she’s blinking more than normal, that’s a good sign.

12. How large are her pupils when you two are talking?

If her pupils get large when you’re in a conversation, you’re doing something right. This one is quite subtle because pupil size is primarily determined by light levels, but secondarily attraction can also increase pupil size.

13. How long is she holding your eye contact?

If you notice that she’s holding eye contact slightly longer than normal, she’s probably interested in you. That kind of eye contact often feels more intense, and can even be a bit weird or uncomfortable.

14. Is she giving you a light smile when you get eye contact?

Say that you’re all standing in a circle, and when someone else is talking, you two get eye contact. Does she give you a slight smile? She likes you.

Same thing if you get eye contact at a distance, in a park or at a bar. A smile is like an invitation to start talking.

15. If there’s background music, what’s her body language and what is she looking at?

This sign is most useful at a place with some background music, for example at a bar or a club.

If she’s moving in rhythm with the background music and at the same time looking at you, that’s a sign she’s attracted to you. Dancing like that and looking at you is an inviting form of body language. That tells you she wants your attention and is trying to get you to make a move.

16. What’s her posture like around you?

Does she straighten her posture when she gets your attention or is close to you? That means she’s trying to make a good impression on you.

17. What direction is her body facing in a group?

If she’s facing you more often than she’s facing others in a group, that’s a sign she’s into you and values you more than others in the group. This is especially telling if you’re not even the one talking the most in the group.

18. Where are her feet pointing?

If her feet are pointing toward you, that’s a sign in the same line as if her body is facing you. She’s subconsciously focused on you which makes her feet point toward you.

19. Is she fiddling with or straightening her clothes, jewelry, or accessories?

This could be because of nervosity, but it can also be because she wants to look good in front of you. It’s a classic sign of attraction.

20. What direction are her palms facing?

If the palms of their hands are pointed in your direction that signals she might be interested in you. It’s a weak signal, but it’s still positive because it’s part of an open and welcoming body language she has toward you.

21. If you touch her, does she touch you back?

For example, if you touch her arm, does she touch you in a similar area later on in the conversation? If she does reciprocate your touch, that’s a great sign, but it also depends on if she’s touchy with most people or just you?

Also, shy girls usually don’t touch back because they’re so afraid of messing up.

22. Does she touch you when you talk or in any other situations?

Common areas to touch are arms, shoulders, back, hands, or thighs. Hands or thighs are usually more intimate if she touches those.

23. Do you ever have “peripheral physical contact”?

Peripheral physical contact is when some part of your bodies are in contact with each other when you are doing something else.

For example, if you’re both sitting down and your thighs are barely touching each other. Or if you’re walking side by side and she grabs hold of your arm. That kind of passive physical contact means a lot and can build a lot of tension and attraction.

24. Is she giving you more of her attention than she’s giving others?

For example, if you’re in a group but she seems to direct most of her attention toward you. Or if she’s only asking you questions or if she’s laughing more than others at your jokes.

The more attention she gives you, the more interested she usually is in you.

25. Does she ever blush when you talk or get eye-contact?

She might just be shy, but she’s probably a bit extra self-conscious around you because she likes you.

26. Does she ever seem to look in your direction from afar?

Girls are often a bit sneaky when they want to check you out. They can make it seem like they’re only looking in your direction or just grazing you with her eyes. I’ve even seen girls using window reflections to check out a guy (and to check if he’s looking at them). Sunglasses are even sneakier.

So if she’s looking in your direction, especially if she does it several times, she’s probably checking you out.

27. Does she keep the conversation going when you stop talking?

What happens when you stop talking or can’t come up with anything to say? If she seems eager to get the conversation going again, that’s good. If she excuses herself, she may not be that interested.

Click here to read my full guide on how to talk to girls.

28. Does she always reply when you call, text, or message her?

Quicker responses are often a sign of interest. But many girls are so afraid of appearing needy that they delay their response even if they like you.

29. Who texts or calls first?

If she’s often the one initiating, that’s a very strong sign she’s into you.

But if she never calls or texts first, that’s a sign of lack of interest. In that case, it can be good to take a step back to see if she will take initiative when you don’t do it before she even has the chance.

30. How often does she text you?

Compare this to how often you text her. It’s the same principle as matching the length of her texts. She’s eager if she’s texting more often than you, and you’re eager if you’re the one texting more often.

31. Does she ever stammer, stutter, or forget what she was about to say in a conversation with you?

This could mean she’s a bit extra shy or self-conscious around you, which tells you that she might also be a bit extra interested in you.

32. Does she back off if you get a bit too close?

If she doesn’t even flinch when you get a bit too close to her personal space, that’s a sign she wants you close to her.

If you take a step closer, and she backs off by a step, that’s a sign she’s a bit more reserved toward you.

33. Does she ever talk about things she wants to do with you or show you?

Planning or mentioning things they want to do with you in the future is a very strong indication of some sort of interest, romantic or platonic.

For example, if you’re talking about a newly opened restaurant and they say “We should go there someday!” or “I’ll show you how amazing that place is!”

34. How does she react when you discover you have something in common?

If she’s happy, that’s good. This sign is extra strong if it’s something very trivial, like that you live in the same part of town, that you’re the same age, or that you both like pizza.

35. Is she asking you any personal questions?

If she is, that’s telling you that she wants to know more about you and is interested in you. The more she asks, the better.

For example, asking about your plans for the future, your childhood, or just about your favorite food.

36. Has she asked about your plans for the day or the weekend?

This might just be empty small talk, but it could also be her trying to open a window where you can meet again and hang out. It’s more likely it’s a sign of interest if she brings it up near the end of the conversation.

37. Does she seem embarrassed if you two are the only two people left in a situation?

If she does but doesn’t do anything to leave the situation, that means she’s just a bit shy but still interested.

A classic example is if you meet her with her girlfriends at a bar, and then all her friends leave, but she stays. That’s perfect because it also means her friends approve of you.

38. Has she told her friends or family about you?

This one is most relevant once you’ve already started dating. But it’s such a huge sign of interest (and approval) that I thought it was worth mentioning. It’s even bigger if she’s from a culture where approval from the family is important.

If she’s told her family, it means she is visualizing and planning a future with you. Congrats!

If she just told her friends, that’s also great, but not as big as her family.

39. Has she ever offered you a massage?

Offering a massage is a nice thing to do, but it’s also a smooth way for a girl to get you both touching each other. (Remember to offer her one back. If you like her!)

40. Does your best friend like you?

Is she acting differently from how she usually behaves? Does she seem jealous or dismissive of other girls you might like? Is she suddenly extra touchy-feely? Is she unusually interested in your interests?

Those are all signs your best friend might have started liking you as more than a friend.

41. How do you know for sure if she’s interested?

You can’t really know for sure if she’s interested just based off of a sign in this list. But there are a few rules you can use to help you know:

  1. Is she regularly showing you different signs of interest?
  2. Does she act differently to others than to you? (So she’s not just flirty with everyone.)
  3. Has she shown any particularly strong signs of interest?

42. Are you still unsure if she likes you?

I’ll do my best to help you interpret the signs you’re getting. Just write it down in the comments below in as much detail as possible.

Viktor is a behavioral scientist specialized in social psychology.

Before he joined SocialPro, he worked as a coach helping his clients take the next step in their personal development.

He has degrees from the University of Gothenburg and Chalmers University.

Follow on Twitter or read more.

Viktor Sander B.Sc.

Viktor is a behavioral scientist specialized in social psychology.

Before he joined SocialPro, he worked as a coach helping his clients take the next step in their personal development.

He has degrees from the University of Gothenburg and Chalmers University.

Follow on Twitter or read more.

Viktor is a behavioral scientist specialized in social psychology.

Before he joined SocialPro, he worked as a coach helping his clients take the next step in their personal development.

He has degrees from the University of Gothenburg and Chalmers University.

Follow on Twitter or read more.

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Comments (140)

  1. Phillip

    It’s a woman I meet back in February this year. We agreed to be just friends, but my feelings for her have grown, not sure if hers has as well, most of the signs you speak of are all there, but she keeps telling me she not ready for a relationship, I don’t ask and have never told her how I feel, but she keeps reminding me of this on a regular bases.
    What’s worse for me is I know currently she has had a Fwb going on with another woman, she tells me it’s just fun as that’s all she after, but then keeps inviting me every where she’s going, the smiles the dancing the touching is all confusing me, she acts like she wants more than Friends but then tells me she is not ready for a relationship.
    Haven’t just been friendzoned, reading into the situation wrong as I have feelings, or is it just a matter of time, let her so her thing and wait and see, or is it time to man up and tell her how I feel

    • Viktor Sander B.Sc.

      She could very well be attracted to you, but still not interested in a relationship. She could also just like the attention you’re giving her.

      I think you should emotionally prepare yourself to move on. Make your move, but be ready to get rejected. And then move on to greener pastures.

      The worst thing you could do is to keep waiting for her to “get ready”. She might never get ready for something serious with you, and then one day she’s suddenly ready when she meets someone else.

      I’ve been there. Waiting for someone to get ready, who never got ready – for me. It’s the worst.

  2. Nevin

    Hi Viktor,
    I recently met this girl online and I recently asked her out on the date and she agreed. We both went for lunch and she asked few questions for me but I kept the conversation going and it was chill. After lunch, she asked me places to eat and I told her maybe next time we could go and she seemed good about it. I asked her about her schedule for the week and she said she would let me know. After the date, I texted her and said I had a good time and asked when she was free. She did not respond after 1 day. SHould I wait or is she just not interested?


    • Viktor Sander B.Sc.

      She’s not interested I’m afraid, but she’s probably afraid of rejecting you because she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. There’s also like a 5% chance she’s just really busy, but I wouldn’t hold my breath for that.

      Keep looking for someone better, you got this!

  3. Dave

    I have met a girl and we both get on really well and I have some sort of feelings for her. She displays many of the green signs in this article and she has suggested that we meet up again and get something to eat / her come to my place. I think we are both okay with just being friends at this moment. I am a very anxious person and overthink a lot so I am anxious about my next steps in talking to her. How can I create this friendship and take the initiative to invite her to do things and get involved with each other’s lives? How can I keep the conversations interesting without letting anxiety take over and how can I become a interesting person she wants to be around, although I know she likes being around me anyway I don’t want to screw it up. She compliments me to me and other people so I assume that’s a sign she likes me even as a friend?


    Hi Viktor,
    There is a girl I had interest in, but later on she started showing feelings which I knew she was interested. After a while, she started pretending as if she was not interested, or even making me jealous. The first time we met, she called her brother who was my friend back in university, to let him know I was with her. Recently, I told her I don’t think I can date her, that we should Just be friends (via text/chat), and her reply was: “let me first give you a hug, thank you very much”.
    Her next chat immediately after that was: “how can I invest in cryptocurrency”, which she knew somehow that I am very good and knowledgeable in that area.

    Could she still be interested in me, or she felt rather heartbroken or happy that I said I can’t date her?
    Or could her interest in what I like be a means to get my attention back to her?


  5. Anonymous

    I’ve known my female friend for a minute I recently told her I like her she said”I like the relationship we have now it’s not really a good time for me to change it”. Any suggestions if she likes

  6. Nick

    A girl I work with is throwing my head all over. Started with a work do last year, she sat with me, legs over mine, took my hand to drag me out to the smoking area,pulled my hand around her waist to her arse, proper flirty. Then as nights go on she socialises with her friends and I do mine. Over the past few months she would every now and then pass a comment to me regarding pretty much anything. A week or so ago she added me on Instagram, and she has no other guy from work on there despite working closer with them. I decided to drop her a message 2 days ago as a response to something she randomly showed me at work, and her responses went almost straight to innuendos and clearly pretty raunchy related stuff, but denies all knowledge of anything that happened at the party last year. Messages go from wanting me to be ‘exciting’, some teasing but also an occasional short message and long between replies. I don’t know if I’m onto something here or if I’m just being used as a way of getting attention. Thanks

  7. Jala

    There is a girl in my high school, we have talked just a few times and she seems nice to me. The thing is that we don’t get to talk much. What I have noticed that she does greet me with a nice and cheerful ‘hi!’ unlike the way she greets her other guy friends. Her guys friends also tell me that she thinks that I am a smart guy. I like her a lot and I just want to know for sure that whether she like back or not? Is she just friendly or is there a chance for something more?

  8. Lucy

    One of my best friends is showing loads of signs but I’m not sure if it’s just coincidental. She put her legs on mine the other day when we were sat next to each other in class and cuddled me and hugged me whenever there was an opportunity e.g. I was saying oh no I might have to do the 800m on sports day and she quickly grabbed me and said “oh (my name)” and squeezed me gently I don’t know how long it would have gone on if I hadn’t pulled away. Then later she kept leaning into me and then put her hand on mine and was teasing me a bit and then she kissed the air near me in a kind of jokey way (“mwah”). I was really nervous and kept pushing her off in case people saw us (we were in a lesson) but I don’t know if she’s just like that with everyone or it’s just like banter because we are close friends or anything?

  9. Gloria

    I’M a female and I was at a dealership and the finance manager shared some personal information with me. She told me she was divorced, she had a daughter, she didn’t do church, and she would like to do lunch sometimes. She gave me her
    direct number at work not her cell number. Do you think she want a friend or lover.

    • Viktor Sander B.Sc.

      I doubt it was purely friendship. But it could also have been business, maybe she’s part of some MLM-scam she wanted to recruit you to.

      Did you get any flirty vibes?

  10. Vinit

    We are swim mates, she is 4years younger than me and I think she likes me, do you think this age difference can be uncomfortable for her?

    • Viktor Sander B.Sc.

      What are your ages? It depends!

  11. Pius

    I suspect she’s a bit older and I think she knows it too. But I’m not sure of what she’s up to. She greets me whenever she sees me, but initially, her greetings weren’t always audible enough. I think it’s because I was not responding at first, but since I noticed and started responding, she’s been greeting loud and clear. It even feels like she may be looking for a way to talk to me, but I’m not sure.

  12. Dean blears

    Hi.was there for her in a breakup.shes always texting me.comes over when im out.laughs at alot of things i say.when shes down she always txt me.shes just started to go on a thew dates with a guy but just says i will see were it goes.tells me when shes been crying.if im out she always looks over then comes across aswell.just not sure how she feels.

  13. Tawqeer

    Few signs shows she likes me. But some times i feel that she is not sexually attracted.
    Some times i linger my hand on her external thigh she dont take my hand off even. But sometimes she dont sit with me in front seat.
    I dont know is she intrested sexualy or no.
    She smiles, lock eyes, sometimes her body language shows she is into me. But i am not 100% sure. please

  14. AJ

    How do I know if she’s into me like the other day I was texting this girl inviting her to come over to cuddle and watch movies with me she said lol ion wanna tease you with my body with a 😉 what does this mean?

  15. Jennifer

    Sir, I got a question about you men please help as much as you can. 1 of my men friends while alone will not smile at me but around his friends he will. I have a broken foot his friends asked how I was doing and I said I’m getting over a broken foot they said we heard I smile and said OK. His friends while we are at places will be talking then looks over at me a lot.I have walked past him on 28th of June and looking down looking at him out if corner of my eye smiling around his friends my friend said as soon as I walked past him he looked and smiled at me. We’ve in the past 4-5 years ago flirted locked eyes and he tapped my rear 4 times I acted like I tripped to get him back I said sorry he smiled said it was fine. Last 2 years we both have been not talking as much we both went through a divorce but now things is coming back around like it was the looking the smiling. What is your opinion please help ease my mind.?????

  16. Sam


    I actually have a question that concerns me. I sometimes get bullied by my friends at university. It is not physical bullying. It is actually verbal bullying.

    The problem is that I got bullied in front of my crush, but I try my best to answer and argue with what they are saying. Do you think that she is not interested in me anymore because of that?


  17. Anonymous

    And also she stares at me when iam looking around… Plz tell me what should I do??

  18. Anonymous

    Ok. I like a like a girl in my university. But iam not sure if she too like me.she do the lip biting thing. She tries to keep the conversation going even if I have stopped talking. I also told that I like her and in future i want her but she always she i’ll do whatever my parents say..but she always laugh when I say that I like her and need her… What should I do??

  19. James

    She always seems interested in what I have to say, has a nickname for me, laughs at pretty much every joke I tell, and she said I should work the exact same days she does after school.

  20. Yeet

    Is she doing “THE LICK THING”!


  21. Kevin

    Hello i was actully curious been talking to this girl and everything goes smooth and we laugh and talk about everthing, but recently shes been really touchy,touching everytime and sometimes when our hands collide she touches my hands or our legs or very close that we touch each other and she likes to put her arms on my shoulder sometimes when i do mean joke but its all jokes it doesnt hurt but shes been touchy alot, and for testing her i saw a girl where we where and i said oh shes hot and she said hey im right here and she started to laugh.
    I dont know if it was a joke or maybe it kinda affected her i dont know but we do have alot of fun together but the thing is she has a boyfriend so im kinda confuse ?? I did ask her if she realize thats she touches me alot but she said im her best friend ?? Is she indenial ? Is there something building up.

    Thanks for the advice

  22. hyr

    i think u r a lv doctor

  23. Anonymous

    Ok so I like this girl from work. Whenever I pass by or talk with her she’s always prolonging her eye contact, smiling at me a little longer than normal, and she’ll always shift more towards me when we’re talking to each other or in a group of people. Also our conversations are always long and back and forth. I’ve NEVER been able to talk to other girls the way I’ve been able to talk to her. I notice that she doesn’t do this a lot with the other guys that she works with or talks to. I’m not sure if she actually does like me or if this is just her personality?

    • Anonymous

      Just give it a try! Give small hints and ask her out. Good luck.

  24. Anonymous

    Ok, so I like this girl who I semi regularly work with. Whenever I pass by her or talk to her she will hold eye contact with me for almost the entire time I’m with her, she will smile at me for most of the time I’m talking to her or whenever I pass by and she’s ALWAYS facing me when we’re talking. I notice that she doesn’t do this a lot with other guys that she works with. I’ve wanted to ask her out for the longest time but things always seem to get in the way. I’m not sure if she actually does like me or if this is just her personality?

  25. Anonymous

    theres a girl i like and she gives a lot of signs that she likes me: the teeth lick, the lip bite thing ect., but she says she likes me almost as a joke, does she really like me?

  26. Anonymous

    doesnt really talk to me. I think shes to good for me

    • Nick

      I feel that bro

  27. Anonymous

    She like says she won’t date me but she like play hits me and she but her hair in my ear and lately she’s been real nicer and she gets mad for me having another girl bestfriend. So like something tells me she likes me but she won’t amit it yet is it best if like i don’t talk to her for a while.

    • Anonymous

      She most likely likes you, as Viktor said, most shy girls will say that its a joke or play it off, but since she gets mad if you are best friends with other girls, bites her lips , etc., you should straight ask her, however this might come with a mild risk as she wont know how to respond as she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship between both of you, you should start a casual conversation and try to transition little by little to the question.

  28. Huskels

    I have a crush since the first day I saw him in 2017 and since then thing got weard, we are seeing each other at church, he is married but I cant help it I like this man, he always sits infront of the church and me at the back we hug sometimes, talk somethimes I even told him I have a crush on him and he was not angry at me just said maybe as a father but I told him no not at all. And he does not mind me being close to him or he to me and I once accidently touched his leg while sitting I thought I am going to get shouted at but he kept quite looking at me and I was looking at him, what a moment but we just carried on listening to the Priest.

  29. Anonymous

    Okay, so I like this girl and I have her on Snapchat and we’re #1 on each other’s best friends list and we have a 100 day streak and within them 100 days, we’ve hung out 3 times and we’ve done things together (sexually). But she calls me her “bestfriend forever” and all kinds of other things like “you deserve the world” and “you’re the sweetest guy I know”. I don’t know what to think about everything, I have more information if someone can help me out

  30. zackery

    this girl i like, she teases in the conversation, strong eye contact, she laughs at me if we just look at each other,feet pointed to me, she straightening her hair while we talk, she talks about her family to me a lot, even talks about her future education, kids, etc… seems to be open and closed case but i dont want to mess up a good friendship if she actually dont want to move it up a level.

  31. Jay

    I work with this girl, she always takes time to ask about out if work things like if I live local and how old am I, and the other day I caught her grinning at me as I passed her.
    Two minutes after, she came to ask me something and places her hands on my hips from behind and I was quite surprised.. lol.

  32. Jon

    She texts me everyday and will text all day long!
    She is always there when I need advice and to help me get through something.
    She is always telling me how sweet and nice I am.
    She is always laughing at things I say.
    She is aware of my divorce and ever since I moved out, is now happy and will FaceTime me.
    We talk on the phone for almost an hour sometimes more.
    She always asks how I’m doing.
    She always texts or calls me when she is frustrated or wants to vent.
    She says she is very appreciative of things I do for her and always being there for her.
    She went out of her way and out a lot of thought behind getting me a gift.
    She tells me she is trying to pay more attention to things I say and how much I pay attention to her.
    She is always telling me how great of a guy I am.
    She lets me know when she does things or when she gets home etc…

  33. Alex

    She smiles at you when you look at her.

  34. Sunglasses

    Okay so I’m gonna jump right into it. There’s this Starbucks I regularly go to and I’ve grown to know many of the employees but one in particular is obviously my favorite. She was the first one to ask me what my name was. We started talking each time and there seems to be some sort of connection. we both get more visibility excited to see each other every time I go through the drive thru. Yesterday we hit a new level of excited. I drove through after work like I always do because Starbucks takes all my money but I pull up to the window to pay and she’s standing in the background and as she sees me pull up she waves super excitedly at me(yes I’m sure it’s directed towards me I was the only one in her line of sight) then runs over to the window disregarding the paperwork she was doing also stealing the drive thru from who was running it. She says “what’s up sunglasses! I haven’t seen you in a while!” (She actually has a nickname for me) she then proceeds to tell me she started working nights and I should come in sometime. We ended up holding up the drive thru talking (it was both of us not just me). Today I did my usual and went after work. She happened to be working again she then proceeded to steal the drive thru window again and right as I pulled up she said “HEY QUEEN” super excited. She said she liked my new rainbow watch band and asked if I was going to the pride parade BUT THEN SHE ASKED ME IF I HAD A SNAPCHAT. So obviously I gave it to her because I was gonna ask her for her number at some point I just didn’t wanna scare her off or anything. I asked her if she was working tomorrow and she said she was working close. I told her that I would keep that in mind (super mysterious I know lol) and she’s like “alright see you tomorrow then :)”. We snap chatted almost instantly and she kept sneaking to use her phone while she was at work.

    • Mrs Nobody from Nowhere

      Well, I really fancy a male barista at my local branch of Starbucks so you’re by no means the only one!

      I get the distinct impression that some of his male colleagues think the situation is hilarious, though I must admit I have no idea whether they’re poking fun at me, him or both of us.

      Today one of these men told me I was a “VIP” customer and plastered a huge, exaggerated grin on his face.

      This was RIGHT IN FRONT of the one I like.

      So I just said that if I was a “VIP” customer, did that mean I could get a discount? 🙂

  35. Artrell

    Hi Mr Viktor please answer this so this girl that I like she will always play fight with me even though she does it With other boys then she will try to get me in trouble like she say that to the teacher that I kick her even though I didn’t kick her and today she ask do ever had girlfriend and I say no then she ask if I want a girlfriend and I say stupidly say no and then one time she that this girl like me even though I don’t the girl I don’t know if she like me please help me!

  36. Anonymous

    Hey .. I live in an environment where it is almost impossible to meet with my girlfriend.. I know her from 8 year but we fell in love in 2017 end. She likes me as she tells me but she always remain reserve due to religious belief and she is unable to text me everyday because she has no personal mobile.. she still pretend to love me . She also cant able to tell to her family and whenever i am angry on her often she says sorry to me. But she is not much interested in love talks but interested in general talks. I dont know what but just i want to know that does she loves me or not.. she is not jealous when i talk to other girls but she says that she trusts me and i’ll not leaving her anyway. We both are 18 years old.

  37. Anonymous

    Can we talk on instagram my insta is @im_jesus_martinez Please i need help

  38. Anonymous

    Hi my name is MXO Handebe . And I have a crash in my church her name is ALWA , she very full of her that girl I’m telling you man. One day it our second seveys in Church. She was sitting next to me busy with her phone whatapping during the surveys, So I was looking through her phone just to see who is she talking to ….what she said to me was very very hurtful. She said “HEY you what are you looking through my phone , stop look through my business boy” then I stopped looking as she told . Then I saw a pic of WEED on the a plant .And she said it again”HEY you are doing it again MFTHU” she said mixed imotion ….I don’t why . Then her friend then told to stop what to me , while her friend was telling to be nice . I was still looking through the phone , then I saw her sexy pic nigga yooo😍😍😍😍😋😘 . Her friend saw me acting all funny after looking through the phone , I may say she saw that crazy about ALWANDE .Her friend told me to tell she’s beautiful, ALWANDE was say that I will slap you ….in a fun way , she was like I’m joking while saying that . I just blashed and kept quiet….then I told my homie AVELA he said there one chick between whose crashing on me . I was maybe her friend not her . But ALWANDE eyes too😍😍😍😍

    But please there is more of the story it tooooo looooooong


  39. MXO

    It is really helpful… thanks for the update and for the record

  40. Angelo

    she said she wants to get to know me because she may like me help me im confused

  41. Ananamous

    I met a woman I text her she don’t text me back it takes a while she does not have eye contact once in a while she.does but I am intrigued she will let me message her legs and feet with oil what do u think

  42. Will Flach

    Okay so we talk on Snapchat and sometimes after swimming she will send me pictures of her by the pool she will answer my snaps sometimes right away and other times it will take her a bit. Also sometimes her friends will send me a picture of her when they hang out but she really gives mixed signals. We did talk at school to because we had all the same classes and one time we locked eyes for a long while then she turned away. Another time and a party the song single ladies came on when I was by her and her friends were pushing her telling her she needs to dance because she is a single lady. I really like her and I don’t know what to do because I want her to like me. She gives a bunch of mixed signals like sometimes she will talk then she won’t and I’m not the hottest guy at our school but I want a chance with her if it’s possible and if she at least kinda has a thing for me. I could really use your help.

    • Will Flach

      She also won’t give me clear signals and won’t talk about if she likes someone

  43. Bond

    So I’m High school with not a lot of friends and there’s this girl I like . To be honest we don’t talk much, she sits in front of me in one of my classes and the girl I like turns around and puts her elbow on my desk (she like rests her head on her fists ) while she’s following along with the book that our teacher reads even tho she know that I’m close to her and sometimes she draws stuff on my paper or arm ( I don’t know what that means). At lunch she has a lot her own friends and prefers to sit in a different table with me even tho there’s only 1 more person sitting with us. Is it just that she feels bad for me for not having enough friends or what?

  44. Anonymous

    A girl sat next to me in a lesson at school and started asking a lot of very personal questions. I am not sure if this is a good sign that she likes me though, because she accused me about liking her friend (although I don’t) a while ago when she sat on the same table of me. This was in a sort of jokey way though, so I don’t know if it is of consequence. Does anyone know how I can tell for sure if she likes me?

  45. Alex

    So this girl I like got kinda close to me, she was sitting behind me bc we were on a ATV but I scooted up and she would still get close. Is this a sign?

    • Anonymous

      FOR SURE

  46. Anonymous

    So there’s this girl at school I like but I’m not sure if she likes me. We have a decent amount of thing in common, and gives some of the signs here but gives me mixed signals. She smiles and talks to me when we are talking together, but that seldom is the case, and I don’t know if she does that with all her friends or not, and we’ve also only ever really communicated in a group. Also, she is fairly critical of things I do, like me overreacting at stuff (I’m spontaneous; I do this often), giving a passing remark. And often in brief meetings with more people, like entering the classroom, while she holds the door we don’t even make eye contact. But when I enter a room and it’s just us, she smiles and waves. And she has made jokes and teases to me, but mainly in the past when we interacted more. I don’t quite know her well enough, and her lack of a phone makes it hard to connect. What should I do?

  47. ken

    she does majority of these signs but has a bf. what does this mean?

  48. Matthew

    Hey I’m Matthew,so there’s this girl in my class who I didn’t like before but then after sometime I developed some feeling towards her,she’s the kind of girl who always talk to other boys really close but when she is around me she turns into a different person, she will talk less with other boys and ask me some personal questions, her friends also asked me my thoughts about her, she also gave me something l liked before and if I remember correctly she hinted at wanting to hang out, but the main problem is that during class she always sits around a bunch of boys and like talk all the time so I’m not sure whether she has feelings for me or not . It’ll be nice if you can help me with this

  49. jacob

    hey so my name is jacob and theres this girl named chloe. we don’t really talk much but she laughs at my jokes (we are both in high school btw and also in 10th grade). does she like me??? she also asked for my phone number in history class and then facetimed me even though we were right next to each other. is she stupid, or does she like me?

    • charles

      hello jacob i am charles it is nice to meet you i am in high school but nineth grade and i have had that thing happen to me a lot where a girl asks for my phone numbr and facetimes me immediately and once or twice she asked to hang out with me outside of school and we did and dated so i would say to ask her out.

  50. Peyton Havens

    There was a girl in my class that would always ask me to sit by her. She also had a friend that sat by her, and when she was there the girl that I think liked me would always talk loud, even if she wasnt talking to me. When her friend would move somewhere else she would talk to me in a whispery voice, like she was telling me a secret. There was one time where she asked me who I think she liked in that class. I named off every single boy in the class but myself and when my face started getting hot, thank the lord, my friend came over to me and started talking to me. Was all of this a sign that she liked me?

    P.S. She wrote her number in my yearbook with a heart and she had wrote “Call me!”

    P.S.S. I am very shy and she is very loud and I get a feeling that she loves making me uncomfortable because she always asked me who I liked and she would hug me at random times. She would also touch my foot and put her foot very close to the no no squar(she acted as if she didnt know she was doing it). She would also do the mirroring thing and would fiddle with her cloths alot.

    P.S.S.S. We are both 13

  51. dawn

    she has a girlfriend and she has this move that she will ask me to hang out with her secretly but with the group. if her girlfriend will be there to listen the conversation her voice change its tone it will become casual voice but if we are the only one talking her voice is soft and minimize where usually she talks to others with loud voice. she most of the time invited me to hang out than other friends around but if her girlfriend is there she will ask one of our friends to follow because they will go ahead to the place of hang out and she will instruct our common friend to bring me in the place.

  52. Tyler

    Oh and also, me and her used to be totally comfortable with telling eachother about crushes on other people but now we don’t really do that. but sometimes i will walk by her and her friends and i will always hear a little bit of something like “i like–” and they’ll stop as i get close. is it because they don’t like me or what??

  53. Tyler

    Hey I am currently in highschool(freshman) and there is this one girl(lets caqll her zoey) right? and like everyday we talk, she laughs with me a lot. but she is mean to me a lot as well 🙁 i don’t understand this. Then i forgot to text her back and she got mad at me and now we don’t really talk much anymore. She even told me she liked someone else but i don’t believe it. Mostly because one day in my conditioning class she thought i didn’t notice but when i was bench pressing she was staring at me, and i made eye-contact back and she looked away casually. Does she have a lot of feelings for me or?…. HELP!!!

  54. Chetan

    I am seeing a girl from 4 months. We text every day but neither of us has ever expressed their liking towards each other. She tells me of her financial worries and I am taking care of that. Whenever I call her to meet she never turns it down unless if its an emergency. What and how should my next approach be. I dont like her but I love her and I am feeling scared that if I tell her this and maybe she refuses my heart will be totally broken. She is around 15 years younger to me.

    Kindly suggest

    • Viktor Sander

      It sounds like she might be with you because of her financial worries. I’m sorry to say that. It’s very hard to build a good relationship on a financial basis like that. You will just lose even more money if you keep waiting without knowing how she feels, and that will sting even harder.

      And remember that broken hearts heal too <3

    • Anonymous

      Umm, she might be a gold digger also how old are you

  55. Max

    Hi Mr.Viktor

    I hope you can answer me considering this situation.

    I actually found my crush talking to another guy on the phone. Could it be that she is interested in him or just friends?

    This girl actually do send some signals which shows that she is interested in me.

  56. she is confusing

    I dont know what she is up to:

    we met once before. she liked me i think. but i gave her too much attention. she loves the attention.
    but she is shy and was nervous on the date.

    the date was boring and i couldn’t look so much into her eyes. she did not ask or said as much as i did.

    she said it was a good date but i did nit believe her.

    so i kept texting her and told her how great she is.

    but she was very cold from after the date, responding very late very short etc…
    i wanted to meet again but she had only lazy excuses.

    then I ignored her for some weeks and now she came back.
    she is nice to me and initiates contact.

    my problems are 2:

    why doesnt she want to know more about me; we are only talking surface matters, a little bit flirty or about her.

    second: i asked her indirectly to go in a museum together. she said i should go on my own.(and i dont think that she didn’t get it). so i think she doesnt want to hang out in the near future.
    and i also complimented her.

    >so what i think is: i gave her attention before. she loved it.
    now i have the feeling that she only taps at my shoulder and screams her i am! look at me! im so interesting. please follow me.

    she does only enough so that i follow her and keeps my hope up but only wants attention.

    > what i dont get: how boring and shitty is her life that she takes so much effort only for a litle validation and someone is thinking about her.

    >> so my plan is to play it cool like ice the next 2 weeks and see what happens.
    it’s actually too childish for me anyways. i dont need her. would be nice nothing more.

    she is 17 im 20
    she is a 7 im too i think
    she has not many real options right now just like me

    we have a lot in common actually but we dont talk about it somehow.

    what do ? am i right?

    • Viktor Sander

      I think you’re right about her just looking for your validation. She does not seem genuinely interested in you, she seems manipulative.

      You are worth better.

  57. GIZ

    Well I have a coworker who recently started at the job the first day she left a bit of space but did acknowledged me and asked several questions. The next day she new I was a little upset about work and offered me a hug. She’s been there for about a week and has constantly hugged me since. Hugs when she wraps her arms around my weist to hugging me from behind we do text she has started the text and I have started 1 time I told her she was cute the next day meaning today she let her hair down and she was even more stunning! I text her to say I don’t want to be a bother but let her know she was beautiful today she waited about 10 mins replying that I’m not a bother with a 😉 however she has let everyone know she is there to work not make relationships. She also said she could use a hug from me last night but I live 1 hour away from work. My problem is I’m lesbian and she to me comes off as a straight woman so I’m a bit confused as to how I should take her gestures. She knows I’m a lesbian and she has never really replied with her preference. So should I take it as she is just friendly with me because she does not act like that with others or should I just let it ride out.

    • Viktor Sander

      She’s definitely flirting with you. She even invited you home to her saying she needs a “hug”. Wow. Can’t be more obvious than that without saying it out loud.

      Don’t think too much if she’s straight or not. It’s her actions that count and they tell you that she’s interested. You got this! But take it slow since it’s a coworker and make sure you don’t have a falling out if it doesn’t work out.

  58. Bob

    Hi.. I’m unsure just need a little help please
    Ok signs I’ve seen. I’m male ten years older than her when I mention this she says that’s ok nothing wrong with that..but no mention of friends she has the same age. She’s told me many intermate things like she’s more confident with the lights off things about her exes .when we touch by accident it’s a oops like I want to but not sure if I can .from her.. also she knows I’m married but she’s single .texting is equal in length and who’s first

  59. Max

    Mr.Viktor when a girl does not pass by you in university and doesn’t want your attention means that she is not interested?

    The girl and I don’t know each other.

  60. Anonymous

    I’m not sure you’ll get this, but I’m just gonna take my chance.
    So, she’s:
    1 openly talking about romance anI me and stuff (she’s an otaku, I just like anime.)

    2 facing me FULLY with her body when we talk. No problem with that.

    3 not texting me first at all, but the one time we texted, she was overly excited to chat

    4 giggling at my jokes.not laughing her life away, but she’s chuckling/giggling

    5 she genuinely smiles when we talk

    6 her pupils dilate… (I think so)

    7 she’s really interested in my talent (art)

    8 she’s always excited to help me with math and stuff (not sure that’s a sign)

    9 she plays with her hair,but not while we’re talking, when she’s NEAR me.

    10 she dosent start conversations when we’re close to each other, but when I start one,shes fully engaged in it, and at times, excited

    11 she gets close to me, no prob

    12 she dosent go out of her way to touch my shoulder and whatnot, but she let’s our feet and arms touch when we sit together

    13 she has no problem walking beside me/ intentionally trying to catch up to me or slow down so I can catch up to her

    14 eye contact? No problem.

    15 she asks me stuff like “what are you doing this weekend?” OR “what are you doing?” Like it’s normal

    I’m asking these because I’m going to ask her out (not on a date, for REAL) because we have UNUSUAL chemistry. We really… have a connection. But, I’m scared I’m just mistaking it for friendship. Your see, I have problems with overthinking stuff, and I’ve been weighing myself down by thinking about this all through my free time. I just want to ask her to be my girlfriend, she says yes, and I rest. Because I feel like my FRIGGING HEAD IS GOING TO BLOW UP. Whats your take..?

    • Viktor Sander

      Sounds like she really likes you. But ask her out on a date instead. Or even better, ask her out on some fun activity without even calling it a date first. Don’t set too much pressure up from the beginning.

      I highly advise against asking her to be your girlfriend just like that, unless you’re 15 years old or younger.

      • Anonymous

        well then! i AM 15, so i’m gonna do it soon… i guessed since we’re both not very popular (oof) she’s probably just like me: she’s really nervous but she’s trying to hide it… makes sense… but anyway, thank you SO MUCH for the help!

  61. Gage

    There is this girl who will make eye contact with me, she will hug me a lot and sometimes I see her face flare up red with blush when I’m around. Should I ask her if she likes me?

  62. Max

    So I have a crush on a girl but we do not know each other. We see each other in university. We have never been in a conversation. But I saw some signs and I felt that she like me but I am not sure. One of the signs is that when I stare at her, she looks at me. That actually happened quite often. Another sign is that we had an eye contact that maybe lasted 1.5 seconds until I finally looked away. Another sign is that when I was at class, I looked at the class window and I saw her looking at me from outside of the class. So to sum things up,I caught her looking at me more than once at least.

    I saw actually another sign, but I am not sure if it is a positive one. The sign is that she is avoiding me. Today I saw her on the bus stop, but when she saw me she decided not to go with the same bus me. She took the bus that comes after.

    I would really be glad if you would help me know if she like me or not so I can approach her.

    • Viktor Sander

      It seems she’s at least a little bit interested in you. But it’s weird that she avoided you at the bus stop. Was it that it was the wrong bus for her? Maybe she just felt ugly that day and got self-conscious. Or she’s weirded out by you staring at her so much. It’s impossible to know without talking to her.

      I think you’ll know better if you manage to start a conversation with her. There’s no harm in trying anyway, if she isn’t interested you can focus on other girls instead, and if she’s positive, that’s amazing. You’ll be glad you tried either way.

      • Max

        But why would she feel weirded out by me if I caught her glancing at me and darting her eyes eyes away when I look at her?

        I thought that is she is weirded by me she won’t even make eye contact wit me at any costs.

        What do you think about that Mr.Viktor?

        • Max

          I mean that I caught her glancing at me before the day of the bus incident when she avoided me.

        • Viktor Sander

          It’s hard to know why she looked at you, she could also look at you to see if you’re staring at her again.

          But it’s more likely she’s a bit interested, but since she avoided you, she must be very shy or self-conscious around you. So that means you need to take the initiative since she’d never dare to do it. Let me know how it goes 🙂

          • Max

            Mr. Viktor, next tuesday will be the last day I see her in university because we have a 2 months vacation. Do you think that she will forget about me and that she won’t have the same interest as before when we see each other back again in university after these 2 months?

            The problem is that we don’t know each other and I don’t have her on social media.

            Do you think she will lose interest in me when we see each other again after 2 months or that is not necessarily?

          • Viktor Sander

            Not necessarily, but she might see someone else in that time. You will be kicking yourself if you don’t try at least talking to her. And what if you think about her for all summer, but then in the fall, it turns out she was never interested in you? Better to know now.

    • Olivia

      I think she does

  63. Zackery

    Hey the girl I think is interested in me she tends to do thes things play with her hair, tuck her hair behind the ear, laughing, hold eye contact, she even talks about her family and how many kids she would like to have. I feel like she is interested but she don’t text me I have to text her, but i all get a reply with the same amount of word as mine, and do you think if she was interested she would attempt touches?

    • Viktor Sander

      Doesn’t sound like she’s super interested from what you said, she might just view you as a good friend. It’s hard to tell without more info.

      Even if she’s interested, she might not dare to try touching you.

  64. Anonymous

    So she often looks at me I look at her she does the mirroring thing and I do it back but we are both shy and rarley talk but if I’m having a conversation with someone else she will normally join in

    • Viktor Sander

      Too little information to tell. She could just like you as a friend.

  65. Edward

    I’m the same age as her but there hot boys in her school and I’m normal British boy but she’s Scottish like really Scottish and she only likes me 23% and I love so much and now I’m stuck so if you could help me that would very nice of youXD.and live nexst to her but boys don’t

    Pleas help me

    • Edward

      And what does it mean when a girl is all ways punching you and then 1day she stops but then the next day she is punching you again when you did nothing to prothoc her what doe that mean


      • Anonymous

        Does she punch you when you’re joking?

    • Anonymous

      How does the other 77% of her feel about you?

  66. Eddie

    Hen we first meet she said that she would never go out with me.But I tell her that I like her she still respond to my texts not as fast as I would like but do respond. She say that I should not text or call her but she call and text from time to time.To I texted her told her dam girl you are fine in the last hour but at least she didn’t curse me out on the phone or text.

  67. Anonymous

    Alote out those apply but she talks to all boys in my class but me, what does that mean?

  68. Anonymous

    She just looks at me. And her friends tease her indirectly when im around. She notices every time i look at her. But unfortunately we never had any conversation. so i don’t know if she likes me or not. What should i do first?

    • Anonymous

      Try talking to her! Confidence goes a long way!

    • Anonymous

      She looks at me and I look at her and she smiles sometimes but we never talked so what should I do

      • Viktor Sander

        Talk to her.


    • Anonymous

      she probably likes you try talking to her

  69. Emmanuel

    Don’t know if she likes me, she always find ways to meet me but hardly starts the conversation. She talks to other boys more but still keeps her attention to me whenever I show interest. Can u help me find out

  70. Chris


    So this is kind of long winded but I have to get this off my chest, I have a friend, we are best friends. So here it goes.
    We met acouple years ago, I work for her on the side even though I’ve done work for her in the past. As we moved forward on her project I kept a wall up. We have a lot in common our background and life story, but around last October we were hanging out with one of her employees at a bar talking about the design, I noticed she she sat beside me the kinda snuggled up to me. I thought that’s kinda strange. Then me her employee start playing a friendly game of foosball, she’s standing there with us yelling my name, saying come on you can beat him, really cheering me on but I was getting killed by this guy. We sat back down. Finished our drinks and so on. As we depart she gives me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. Now keep in mind she’s always taking me out to lunch, buying me stuff and so on. Makes a big deal out of my birthday. So here comes thanksgiving, she tells me that she’s really thankful for me. She’s always giving me these looks. Well Christmas comes around and she sends me pictures of her in her pjs then of her and her husband, were both married, all in fun I’m thinking at this point. New Year’s Eve we hang out together because her husbands at work, lawyer. We are at another bar and a lady there assumes we are a couple and she doesn’t skip a beat. Goes with it. She calls me her frusband, bff, brother and so on, so we leave there go to another bar, very dark and quiet, we’re looking at videos on my phone of the days events and she snuggles up to me again. We end up back at her place, husbands home, seems alittle upset but we are all friends, as I’m leaving she begs me to go to a party with them, I told her I couldn’t and left, few days later she called me to meet her downtown because it was her birthday and her husband had to leave, on call, we hung out and shopped some. Acting like a couple. I giver her a card and acouple small gifts. Then they go on vacation, she calls me upset that her passport expired and that her husband and step kids were already there without her. She does call me to vent often and so on. Then she calls me one day to go to her rental property with her, saying she needed my help. I agree to go. Then next day her husband texts me saying he’s on call and ask if I could go help her. And I said yes even Though I already told her yes, so we go to her vacation rental property and go to town for supplies while a few other people are working and so on. Have a lot of fun just hanging out and shopping, later on that Night she tells me it’s her sisters birthday and that we are going to her birthday party, I agreed. Now keep in mind she made it a point to put me in the room beside hers, only thing separating our rooms is a door, we had started drinking some, I was already ready to go, I’m in her room and she says she needs to change, before I can leave she changes right front of me. The gentleman that I am I just turned my back towards her. We go to the party, I get out of her van and realized I left my jacket back at her place, she said she has just the thing, she hands me a poncho, as I’m tucking my shirt in she grabs me and starts running her hand down the front of my pants, I said what are you doing, with a big smile on her face she says I’m helping you tuck your shirt in…. then we go into the party’, I see her sister whom I’ve only met once, hand her her present from me, tell her happy birthday and so on, then I go outside, meet her sisters boyfriend for the first time and he says your chris? The chris? I’m like ya I guess, he’s says dude Lisa really loves you, looking at me dead in the eye, then I look at her sister and she says ya chris, Lisa really loves, she is so happy she has a big strong man like you in her life, I was floored at this point. We go on about the party, leave and go back to her place, alittle tipsy from the party, I’m laying in the bed and hear my door open, she comes in and says I’m gonna tuck you in….I’m like ok, she fluffs my pillows, blankets and so on and gets me a teddy bear out of her room and says sleep with this. At this point I still have my wall up. Being careful. Next day we work I’m getting ready to leave she tells me to come back into my room, turns off all the lights and we sit together in dark, she’s going on about how much stuff she has to get done, I pat her on the back then ask me to give her a massage. I give her a back massage then get ready to go. As I’m leaving she looks at me and says I love you. I tell her I love her also and leave, she looked really sad I had to go. Next day she sends me pictures of the weekend events and so on. Saying how cute… so we back to business as usual since but since then she’s gotten real touchy feely, doesn’t mind being in my bubble, she will also tell me how good I am, that I’m the best, and will tell her husband to let me do stuff because I’m better at it or that I know what I’m doing, even though he’s a great guy and very hands on do it yourselfer kinda guy, I catch her singing songs when we are alone together like wicked game by Chris issac.shes used the term soulmate and so on. Says I remind her of a movie star she had a crush on when she was younger, all of her friends know about me as well as her family like she talks about me. She will take videos and pics of me working and send them to people, friends and so on. She invites me out to eat with her and her husband and always sits beside me, he will leave us there together like he doesn’t mind or don’t care, nothing sexual has happened between us, I care for her deeply, she’s like my best friend , well it’s made me fall in love with her! And I wrote her a poem, gave it to her last week and she cried, leaned into me and said you know were both married right and that the universe was messing with us. I said yes but I just had to tell you how I feel. She always looks at me like she’s looking into my soul, whenever she’s going out of town she makes a excuse to see me before she leaves, and if I don’t see her for acouple days like weekend she always wants to meet up for lunch. I thought the poem would seal the deal or run her off but it did neither, she didn’t skip a beat. Still goes on like nothing but since when she looks at me it’s like she gives me this save me look. We do have a lot of fun together working or not. I can tell she doesn’t get that from her hubby, there’s more to the story but I figured it’s long enough. I know we are both married but I have never felt this way about anybody, not even my wife. I’m just waiting now to see what she wants to do. All the signs are there. I see it in her eyes smile and body willing to wait…. here’s the poem I wrote
    In every song I hear you should hear her sing
    In amazement at what she does can do and has done
    Wonder Woman super woman or just human
    I’ve never met anyone like her bet I never will
    I consider her perfect expressed it before
    In the beginning I put up a wall but a sea of emotions washed it away
    In short time or long time the wait
    This feeling what is it
    Maybe in another life or maybe in a future her
    The look in her eyes the feeling in mine
    Just friends why
    The lucky one to have this friendship or the pain knowing it can’t or can it
    The stories the times the connections
    She’s got the perfect life, she’ll say different me too or do we
    I don’t want it to end cause I know it will then be in short passing
    It’s not lust is it love
    What is it
    I’ve dreamt of her, I did again last nite.
    She’s a dream come true but a nightmare because
    I know I’m sane, is it a higher power
    She’s in my thoughts and she’s on my mind
    I want to climb the highest peek and screem her name because god knows I’ve yelled it in my soul many times
    She tells me her secrets I tell her mine
    Could I go on but of course
    Like a book that never ends but a poem that does.

    It’s just so crazy she made me fall in love with her but at this point I know she feels the same way but don’t want to mess things up between us. She treats me so different than anybody else, special attention. She’s always wanting my feedback on things even though she has it in her mind what and how she wants things. I feel like she puts me way up high on a pedistool, gifts, lunches, dinners and so on. I’m just a average joe. He’s a lawyer but tells me how smart and funny I am. She’s always hugging me, having me massage her or hold her. I can go on and on but that’s the jist of it. Help!

  71. Tim Bolton

    Usually when I’m hanging out with friends i notice her at the corner of my eye staring at me.

    She had a Instagram story saying “send a x if you don’t hate me” I sent it and she said that she would give a honest statement if I sent a pic of me I did and she said she misses talking to me and wished she had the same classes as me.
    Does she like me?

    • Viktor Sander

      Yes! Not sure yet if romantically or not though.

  72. Nothing.

    Okay… There is this girl that I like but I can’t figure out if she likes me back or she’s just being herself. She is sometimes taking my stuff like my hat, and she full on Sat on my desk… Weird because I have never seen her do any of these things. I don’t know if I’m being stupid or if I’m right and she does like me.

    • Viktor Sander

      Seems like playful teasing/flirting (unless it feels like bullying?). She at least has some interest in you.

    • Boi

      Boii she likes u

  73. Ellanor

    Im in college and there is this guy I’ve been talking to all semester. We have a lot in common and we vibe really well. We had a few classes together and we tease each other all the time. People say we are flirty but he hasn’t made a move, and hasn’t asked me out. We also text frequently but i can’t tell if he is just being a good friend or likes me more than that

    • Viktor Sander

      He’s most likely interested in you, but too insecure to make a move. Ask if he wants to go do some activity or something fun with you and see how it goes.

  74. Gabriela

    I have a friend and she seems to talk a lot about guys and her ex-boyfriend. But she is pretty touchy and gets really close to my face as a joke. When we talk we somehow end up holding hands kinda. And idk the overall vibe is pretty flirty the only off thing is that her friends say she is straight and she talks about guys. But idk, doesn’t body language say more than words do?

    • Viktor Sander

      You could try asking her if she’s ever been attracted to a girl. It’s a harmless question if she’s straight. And if she’s not or if she’s interested in you, you’ll notice on her reaction.

      Her actions definitely seem flirty. Worst case I think she might want to see if you are attracted to her to get a self-esteem boost. But I think it’s more likely she’s interested in you. But maybe she feels ambiguous about it also.

  75. Daniel

    Im in eighth grade and this whole year this one girl has always caught my interest she occasionally touches me and playfully slaps me along with a couple other things, she stares at me often and is always talking to me when we have the chance, i just dont say anything to her cause im scared ill mess it up in some way. What do i do?

    • anonymous

      if u like her too of course! but if ur to nervous just txt her if u have her number or get it from her friends or on social media. u can start there then once u think u can do it. go ahead start talking in person.

  76. L

    My best friend and me have been friends forever and recently she has been really flirty with me and even saying that she likes me but I kindly brush it off because ik she is joking well I think cause she’s been really confusing lately like she kissed me on the cheek the other day and she’s liked never done that and and we were texting the other day and she said she wants me all to herself and I really feel like she is just maybe joking with me but idk I tried to ask her about it but I chickened out 😞

    • Viktor Sander

      Wow. Seems as obvious as it can get. Unless she’s really mean and making fun of you or leading you on. But if she’s never been mean before + since you are best friends that seems unlikely. Don’t brush it off next time and go for it!

  77. Frye

    I’ve seen her looking at me but then she darts her head away the seconed I see her. And when she is around her friends she dosent really talk to me. But when she’s not with her friends she talks to me. And when she is talking she makes eye contact for a long time. I want to ask her out but i just want yo be sure she likes me

    • Anonymous

      Trying to find a crush

      • Anonymous

        A girl and I recently told each other we liked one another. Day after, she stops talking to me 😔

        • Viktor Sander

          Maybe she got nervous or afraid she’ll mess it up somehow? You never know what kind of issues someone else might have.

  78. Lavai

    My best friend and me have been friends forever and recently she has been really flirty with me and even saying that she likes me but I kindly brush it off because ik she is joking well I think cause she’s been really confusing lately like she kissed me on the cheek the other day and she’s liked never done that and and we were texting the other day and she said she wants me all to herself and I really feel like she is just maybe joking with me but idk I tried to ask her about it but I chickened out 😞

  79. Sandeep

    We are roommates sharing a different bedroom. She used to come see me when I am in the living room or kitchen everytime. We started hanging out, I see the signs mentioned in points 1,2,3,5,6,8,9,10,13,14,16,17,18,21,24,25,26,27,28,31,33,35,37 in her. She is making plans for the future but she is not coming out frequently now when I am in the room and also looking me from far but not approaching me.

  80. Alex

    What if she grabs my arm to take me to a place instead of just telling me or walking me there without contact

    • Viktor Sander

      It’s a good sign, but not conclusive on its own. It might just be the way she does with everyone she likes, romantic AND platonic.

  81. John

    There is this girl in my class ( sixth grade) and she always playfully punches me. Also, she ALWAYS asks if I would team with her in four square before she asks her friends. I don’t know if she likes me or not because, like I always say, middle school is confusing.

  82. Dev

    There’s this girl in my art class that I like (I’m in 7th grade). She is usually sitting next to me or asking me for help and when I see her for the first time in the day she’ll say my name in an excited high voice. She always laughs at what I say even if it’s not funny. Pls help me lol.

    • Julio Soto

      So this girl I work with, just told me she wants to be my best friend (I know, I got friend zoned). But I she feel wants to be more than friends. She playfully hits me, is nervous when she’s around me, and it seems like she forgets what she wanted to tell me sometimes. When we’re out, she constantly tells me to feel her hand because it’s cold. I may be looking too much into this, but I want to make sure the signs I’m seeing are somewhat true before I make a move.

  83. Brian

    This girl in my social studies class is always sitting by me and playing with her hair and glasses, I like her a lot but I don’t know if she likes me.

  84. Anonymous

    Thank you sir for your advice and replies.

  85. Cons

    There’s this girl in my class that I like (I’m in 7’th grade) she always stares at me but doesn’t smile we barley have conversation but she does blush around me sometimes what do I do please help

    • Anonymous

      I’m in the exact situation


    What if shes alwas laghing gigling or curling/playng with her hair and what if she pulls my hair p.s i am a guy and what if she says i love u or licks/bites hoer lips on a daily baises but alwas or at least just playfully and how do u tell if someone’s just blushing or has realy rosy cheeks p.s again im a thirteen year old boy but i’m still pretty mature enughf. a.k.a (teen)

  87. Luke

    Today she asked me to feel how soft her hair is at least 4 times. she always asks how She looks. we are coworkers in the food industry and she asked me to check if she had ketchup on her pants.she is always teasing me just making friendly cracks about things I say or do

  88. r bell

    A few questions:

    1) As far as teasing goes…is pretty much all teasing considered flirty, as long as it’s not mean-spirited? Example: making fun of your favorite sports team and poking at you for being quiet?

    2) How to interpret a woman staring at you, not breaking eye contact and not smiling?

    3) Same woman as the first two: so, there was a work social event for everyone in my department that she organized, and she asked me if I was going/tried to talk me into going. I didn’t go, and the next day she wouldn’t let it go that I didn’t come and kept talking about how I should have come and would have had fun. No one else reacted like this–one person said once that she thinks I would have had fun, but that was it. Everyone else went, so I was the only one who didn’t. This workplace is very big on “team” and relationship building, so…normally, I would definitely think this was a sign of interest, especially combined with some of the other signs, but it also occurs to me that she just could have been bothered that not everyone on the “team” came and that I like to do my own thing instead of acting like everyone else and trying to fit in.

    • Viktor Sander

      Interesting observations!

      1: It really depends on the context, it’s either a) flirting b) trying to be playful and have fun with you or c) bullying. It can also be some combination of those alternatives. What’s interesting with flirting is that it’s so ambiguous, it’s supposed to be hard to interpret.

      But considering signs 2 and 3, I think she might be interested in you because she’s giving you so much of her attention. Unless it feels more like bullying/trying to put you down? You should have a good grasp if she’s just mean-spirited or not. If she’s not, all of that attention she’s giving you definitely means something.

      • r bell

        Thanks, Viktor. I don’t think it’s mean-spirited or bullying. It’s more like what you wrote, i.e. I’m not sure if she’s just trying to get me to lighten up or if it’s more than that.

        How many signs do you think are enough to feel good about approaching a woman?

        • Viktor Sander

          You don’t really need any signs to go for it if you really like her. But at work, I would be a lot more careful since you don’t want to burn any bridges there. And you don’t have to “make a move”, you can just start talking more to her, maybe try to flirt a little bit to see if she likes it. If you get a positive response to the flirting, I’d consider asking her out on a date (or just a lunch/coffee so there are not so high expectations). And when she’s asking you to come to an event, you should definitely go if you’re actually interested in her.

          Best of luck!