Manners we can steal from charismatic people

My mom’s visiting from Sweden. Yesterday, I surprised her with a trip to a gospel church as I know it’s quite an experience.

The choir at the Brooklyn Tabernacle.

For me, the fascinating part was how the pastor presented his stories.

The audience was spell-bound by what he said – or, to be frank, HOW he said it.

You see, if we’d write down what he said word for word, we’d see how WHAT he said was pretty basic and repetitive. It looked something like this:

“You will overcome.
We will all overcome.
You will overcome.”

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How to take a life goal from pipe dream to reality

When I was around 9 years old, my dad showed me a picture of New York City’s skyline. I couldn’t stop looking at it. The year after, when I was 10, I wrote a little book that I named “The Journey to New York”.

That day, I made the decision: One day, I would live there.

In reality, it’s hard to just move to another country like that. You don’t know anyone. You don’t know how you’re supposed to make a living. And how do you even get a permanent residence?

When I was around 20, I set the goal to be in NYC before I was 25 and run a successful business that helped people. (This was after I’d just read book “The monk who sold his Ferrari”.)

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How I stopped caring what others think

Let’s talk about how I stopped caring about what others thought of me and how you can apply this in your life.

For me, it started a late night out, now many years ago.

I was just beginning my journey of self-development. I was especially concerned about my lack of experience with girls: I had never even kissed a girl.

I always felt like that was something I had to hide and make sure nobody knew about. I worried a lot what others would think of me if they knew.

But this night was different.

I had been out clubbing with my friends and had to grab something to eat at a local hamburger joint. There was no table available, so I sat down by a middle-aged woman.

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Why some people are so popular DESPITE their looks

Today I’m going to talk about why some people are so incredibly popular socially DESPITE their looks (and without having anything else in life going for them at all).

You see, once I was at a computer LAN (Dreamhack, here in Sweden). There, I came across a woman who was both obese and short. There was nothing about her looks that was in her favor. Her cheeks and shoulders connected seamlessly. She resembled a squish ball.

Let’s be honest. People who are unattractive often have a harder time in social life.

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How anxious people can become truly self-confident

Have you ever come across people who only seem confident on the surface? Like if their loudness, dominant manners and urge to take the center stage are more about compensating for insecurity?

Often, the reason for their overly confident manners deep down is a lack of confidence.

Then there are those whose confidence instead feels grounded and authentic. These people don’t need to show off. They can let others take the center stage, and when you talk to them, they don’t have to talk about how great they are. Still, they’re the ones people end up gravitating towards.

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How to become less self-conscious when all eyes are on you

If there’s one thing I remember from school, it’s the terror of arriving in the mornings.

I remember clearly that walk over the school courtyard, feeling everyone’s eyes on me like lasers scanning my every move.

I used to become so self-conscious that it felt like I’d forgotten how to walk. I had to manually control every move my body made and was certain that now, people didn’t just look, they probably took notes and had discussions about what a strange breed I was.

It wasn’t until one of my last years in school that someone told me something that permanently changed how I viewed things.

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How confident people deal with nervousness

A few weeks ago, I and Viktor sent out questions to over 10 000 of you. We asked you about how you view confidence and what specifically you wanted to be better at. It was fascinating to read.

Here are some stats from the survey:

Male to female ratio

Becoming more confident turned out to be universal for both men and women. Here, women were somewhat overrepresented.

Age

We were surprised by how people from all ages are interested in improving their confidence. The youngest being 16 and the oldest being 60, with the majority being 18-28.

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