20 Tips to be Witty

Being Witty

Here’s how to sharpen your wit and be quicker in your conversations. What we’ll go through:

  1. Becoming a quick thinker
  2. Knowing what to say to be witty
  3. Avoiding the pitfalls of using wit

For tips on how to be funnier overall, I’d recommend my guide on how to be funny in a conversation.

Part 1. Becoming a quick thinker

Part of wit is timing – to quickly come up with things to say. Luckily, you can practice becoming a quicker thinker.

1. Do this naming exercise to become a quicker thinker

Wit is often about associating in an unexpected way. If your friend has started lifting weights and looks like he’s added a pound or two, a witty remark could be “I see that the steroids are paying off”. It’s witty because it’s an unexpected association. Here’s how you can practice this ability. read more

How to Make Friends as an Introvert

and
Friendships for Introverts

I’m an introvert, so I’ve never been into networking events, loud parties, bars, or other extrovert social stuff. And when I did try going to meetups, I never really connected with people there.

Over the years, I’ve been able to build up a rich social life despite not being overly social. In this guide, I’ll show you how introverts make friends.

1. Polish up on your social skills

If you don’t do something often, you can get rusty. This definitely applies to meeting new people and getting to know them. A few things to remember to help you feel more confident and less nervous: read more

How to make friends after college

How to make friends after college

When I left college it got harder to make friends. I wasn’t overly social or interested in going out partying every weekend, and my old friends either moved or got busy with work and family.

The secret to making friends after college is to go to places where you can find like-minded people and meet with them regularly. Here’s how to do it:

1. Know that you don’t have to go out partying to make friends

Parties are great for quick hello’s but it’s hard to have a more in-depth conversation when there’s loud music and drinks flowing. To make a connection with someone you need a chance to get to know each other. read more

10 Best Self-Esteem Books Ranked and Reviewed 2019

Books on self-esteem

These are my top recommendation on how to improve your self-esteem.

As a behavioral scientist, I read a lot about self-esteem. I’ve also reviewed what people think about the books online, and compared that with my own experience. I’ve done this to create a comprehensive guide to help you choose the right self-esteem book for you.

Also, see our separate book guides specifically for self-confidence and social anxiety.

Top Picks

Top pick overall

1. The Self Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Overcoming Self-Doubt and Improving Self-Esteem

Author: Barbara Markway

This is my top recommendation in this guide. No questionable ideas – the entire book is based on methods that have been shown in studies to increase self-esteem. Barbara Markway is a renowned psychiatrist in the field. Even though it’s a workbook it’s not dry but encouraging and positive. read more

14 Ways to Find Like-Minded People

How to find like-minded

Here’s how to find friends who are more like you – people with similar interests and mindsets that you can connect with.

I grew up in a small town, as an introvert, which made it hard for me to find like-minded.

In this guide, I show what methods actually work to find people like you and turn them into friends. (I’ve tried all these methods myself.)

This guide works no matter your current social situation or the size of the city you live in.

1. Use these methods to figure out if someone’s like-minded

I’ve learned that you can meet like-minded friends in the most unexpected places. But I missed out on many chances because I didn’t make an effort to get to know people. read more

18 Best Self-Confidence Books Reviewed and Ranked 2019

Books on self confidence

These are the best self-confidence books, carefully reviewed and ranked.

We also have separate book guides on self-esteem, social anxiety, and body language.

Top picks

There are 18 books in this guide. To help you choose, these are my top picks.

Top pick overall

1. The Confidence Gap: From Fear to Freedom

Author: Russ Harris

Of all the books on confidence I’ve reviewed, this is hands down the best one. Why? It has the opposite approach to traditional pep-speech books.

It’s science-based: It helps you apply ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) which is well supported in hundreds of studies to make people feel significantly more self-confident. read more

10 Best Social Anxiety and Shyness Books 2019

Best Books for Social Anxiety

These are the best books on social anxiety and shyness, reviewed and ranked 2019.

This is my book guide specifically for and shyness social anxiety. Also, see my book guides on social skills, self-esteem, making conversation, making friends, self-confidence, and body language.

Top pick overall

1. Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming your Fear

Author: Martin M. Antony PhD

This is my favorite book for shyness and social anxiety. Unlike many other books on the topic I’ve read, it isn’t trivializing. It’s shows understanding of wherever your current starting point is. It won’t force you to do things that make you feel too uncomfortable. read more

How to tell if a guy likes you: 43 signs he has a crush on you

How to tell if a guy likes you

How do you know if a guy likes you?

My name is Viktor Sander. I’ve been working as a dating coach for over 8 years helping both men and women understand the signs we give when we like someone.

Here are the 43 best signs to help you tell if a guy has a crush on you or not.

1. Does he ever stare at you?

You probably know how hard it is to NOT look at someone you like. Prolonged eye contact without talking is a big tell that a guy likes you.

But to be fair, it’s common that guys stare at any girl they find attractive. And it’s an easy way for him to show his interest without having to approach you. But who knows, he might even have a secret crush on you? read more

How to talk to girls: 15 tips to catch her interest

How to talk to girls

I was one of those guys who never got any girls to like me.

Today, I’ve coached over 100 men and worked for 8 years as a dating coach. I know that no matter your current situation, it’s possible to become confident talking to girls.

Here are my best tips on how to talk to girls.

1. Best 6 things to talk about with a girl

What should you actually say when you start talking to a girl? What do girls find interesting?

Here are 6 topics that are fun and easy to start off a conversation.

  1. Movies, music, or books (What does she like? Figure out if you have anything in common.)
  2. Goals and dreams (What does she dream of doing in the future?)
  3. Family (Where are they from, does she have any siblings?)
  4. Traveling (Does she have any travel plans? What’s the coolest place she’s visited?)
  5. Work or school (What does she work with/what class does she like best?)
  6. What she likes doing in her free time

These topic are great to start off with because most girls have something to say about it. When you’ve started talking you can go deeper and develop the conversation more from there. read more

“Why do people ignore me?” – What to do when you get ignored

Why do people ignore me?

When I was younger, I was often ignored.

Later in life, I started studying social interaction. I figured out the secrets behind why we get ignored. Today, thousands of people take my courses on social skills.

Here’s what my journey taught me about being ignored:

By making small changes, you can make people notice you, respect you and want to talk to you.

Contents:

  1. “Why do people ignore me?” The most common reasons for general situations
  2. Why do people ignore me in groups or prefer talking to my friends?
  3. Why do people ignore me after I’ve known them for a while?
  4. Why do I get ignored on text/chat/online?
  5. People ignore me at a new job/school/place
  6. Feeling ignored and having social anxiety
  7. Feeling ignored and having depression
  8. “I think I wouldn’t be ignored if I was more good-looking”

1. “Why do people ignore me?” The most common reasons for general situations

Mistake no 1: You’re quiet or don’t know what to say

Here’s the problem with being quiet: People usually don’t understand that you’re quiet because you’re shy or don’t know what to say (or because you’re an overthinker, like me) read more

Quiet voice? – 16 ways to make yourself heard when socializing

Quiet voice

Have you ever been in a social situation where you felt like no one could hear what you had to say?

Or maybe you felt like they weren’t listening to you over all the loud stimulants surrounding your conversation.

I have a quiet voice and it gets strained in loud environments, so there have been many times in my past where I’ve felt like the group can’t hear what I have to say.

I would have something witty, or interesting to contribute, but my voice wouldn’t carry enough volume to be heard. Other times it felt as though there was never a break in the conversation for me to interject my thoughts. read more

12 Ways to Make Intellectual Conversation

Intellectual Conversation

I LOVE intellectual conversations.

When I moved to a new town and didn’t know anyone, I was starved on them. I just got stuck in small talk with people I didn’t know well.

That forced me to learn to be really good at getting past the chit-chat and making intellectual conversation.

1. You can’t make intellectual conversation with everyone

Some people just aren’t interested in intellectual conversations. Only some of those you come across in life will be.

This guide is about how to figure out who is, and get past the shallow small talk with them so you can transition into more intellectual conversation. read more

“I don’t know what to say” – 10 tips to always know what to say

I don't know what to say

I’ve always been uncomfortable talking to someone new or people I didn’t know well.

Over the years, I’ve learned exactly what to do whenever I found myself thinking “I don’t know what to say”.

First of all: It’s NORMAL not knowing what to say. I thought there was something wrong with me. It just turned out that I needed to learn some strategies for when the head goes blank. You see, social skills aren’t something we’re born with. They’re just that – skills – something we can learn. read more